Should We Change the Locks?

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Since we have discovered the lengths that my SS's fiance - soon to be wife - will go to stalk me here, and interfere in other areas she doesn't belong, my DH and I have been talking about our home security.

Yeah, I know it sounds really paranoid, but please keep reading.

We have a Trust, and my DH made his son the Trustee IF something happens to the BOTH of us. We gave him a set of keys to our home. Also, in case something happens while we are traveling, he can get into the home.

Well, with all of this crap going on with his fiance, and other controlling and materialistic behaviors we have seen in her, we wonder just how far she would go.

My DH's EX has already shown us how greedy she is for money - so she can "Give her kids only the best.", as she said to my DH at their divorce. And how she tried to cheat my DH out of his share of the house sale. She would have gotten away with thousands of dollars if she had succeeded in her devious plan.

We don't believe my DH's son or his daughter would try and pull anything - but this fiance and her close relationship with my DH's EX has us worried!

If something happened to my husband, we just wonder how far this fiance would go to try and get my SS to "Get what 'belongs' to him" that was his fathers. My DH has some valuable collectibles. The EX might somehow (in her sly way) also influence this fiance to do something stupid.

After I became a widow, and was in contact with other widows, I was shocked to hear the horror stories of how far the deceased husbands family would go to get what they felt "was rightfully theirs" because is was their fathers.

I know nothing would happen as long as my DH is alive. If things work out somehow between my DH and his kids, we could consider letting them have the keys back, but for now, we have asked that the son return all the keys we gave him.

If he doesn't return the keys, should we change the locks? It would be a hassle, especially on the antique front door.

Do we sound too paranoid, or rightfully cautious?

as a widow myself, i am with

as a widow myself, i am with you. You can't be overly cautious. Death makes people greedy. I too read a lot of those greed stories from widows complaining about how even their nice in-laws or children ransacked the estate.

Protect yourself. I have had the same thoughts. If anything happens to SO, locks will be changed. I fully expect BM to tell her kids that they get anything in my home because it was "dads". I already know how this all works.

I would change your locks and

I would change your locks and not just incase something happens to him but because if she is that nosy she might just take any opportunity to see in your home with no one there to censor her. Plus I'm sure she would love to report everything she has found to her future MIL. Its not that much of a hassle to change the locks, just go to home depo and buy all new deadbolt/doorknob kits and make sure they are the same key batch, then go home and pop them in all your doors, we have 4 doors accesable to outside in our home and it took us 45min tops to change out all the locks, and they come with extra keys so that you can hide one and put the rest somewhere safe or trusted family members.

I'd change the locks and also

I'd change the locks and also remove the son as Trustee.

Change the locks and name a

Change the locks and name a third party as a trustee. It is weird that your attorney let you name the son. That causes so many problems, I work at a law firm that handles estates and that is just bad news trust me. Families turn on each other and only think in terms of money.