Got flogged on another forum (different site ) for referring to skid 19 as "skid" and called a douchebag-argh!!!!
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I got completely flogged by calling him that when I responded to a post that was originally about whether skids should be treated the same priority-wise as biokids. I explained my situation, got flogged for saying skid and told that I blamed skid for problems, that dh and I are douchebags b/c we didn't want to take over raising of skid when he was 10 and biomom dumped him into the picture. She told dh he was biodad at age 5 cuz half brother biomoms side blabbed (they lived out of state and were visiting and ran into dh).
My point of view is if biomom had the right to decide whether or not to be a mom when she knew she was pregnant, biodad had the same rights. My blood is BOILING from being judged by these assholes!!!!
I don't get what is
I don't get what is supposedly so terrible about the word skid...
Exactly! I call my
Exactly! I call my step-daughters "StDs" as you get them same way.
Thanks, StepAside, I needed
Thanks, StepAside, I needed that laugh!!!!
LMAO StepAside!!
LMAO StepAside!!
Biodad's "right" to decide if
Biodad's "right" to decide if he wanted to be a parent existed at the time of conception. One the kid is conceived, he's on the hook.
Did you really get called a douchebag for using the term "skid?" Or was there more to your post?
I don't think so Oi Vey.
I don't think so Oi Vey. Biomom had these rights when she found out she was pregnant.
1)have an abortion (don't agree with it but she could have gotten one if she'd wanted to)
2)keep kid
3)give kid up for open adoption
4)give kid up for closed adoption
5)take kid to fire station or hospital and relinquish him.
Do you think biomom had these rights? If so, then once dad knows the truth, he has a right to decide whether he wants to or is ready to be a parent or not. Biomom lied and tidn't tell him until skid was 5. When skid was 10 (and violent, spoiled, and out-of-control) she moved him into the same town as us and expected dh and I to raise him for her. Huh-uh honey. You make the bed, you lie in the bed. It's not like dh had any reason to suspect biomom wasn't telling the truth in any case, and the guy she named the kid after had NO RIGHT putting his name on the birth certificate knowing he wasn't the biodad, raising someone else's kid as his own and then bowing out when it wasn't convenient anymore.
Was there more to the post? I stated the important parts of it....
It doesn't work that way.
It doesn't work that way. Welcome to the real world. Once a kid shows up, any parent can decide to be a parent or be a piece of shit who abandons it.
The financial obligation doesn't just "go away" cuz he couldn't keep his d!ck in his pants!!
Really? it doesn't work that
Really? it doesn't work that way in the real world??? Uhm, adoption isn't exactly rare, neither is abortion, and biomoms have the right to choose it (adoption, I disagree with abortion but if biomom had done it you couldn't have stopped her).
If you relinquish a newborn baby you aren't being a piece of shit who abandons it. You are taking enough responsibility to realize other people can give that child a better life than you can. Maybe the birth mother fooled herself the entire pregnancy and thought she could parent when it's not really the best thing for the baby whether due to financial resources, readiness for parenthood etc, or couldn't decide one way or another until the baby was born.
The financial obligation doesn't just "go away" cuz he couldn't keep his dick in his pants? It sure as hell does if another guy KNOWINGLY signs the birth certificate, has the kid named after him, marries biomom, moves out of state, and raises said kid as his own. Ask the lawyer who used to work for child support services who got the case dropped. It took only ONE PHONE CALL!
So you're with a bum. Yay
So you're with a bum. Yay you.
I would NEVER want to be with a man who didn't accept responsibility for his spawn.
There's a term for that: SPERM DONOR. Lucky you, you found one of the losers! I'm so jealous :sick:
How does dh not being ready
How does dh not being ready to father a 5 year old (or 10 when she dumped him into the picture) make him a bum? You never answered my first question. DID. BIOMOM. HAVE. THOSE. RIGHTS?????
Karma, baby. Just wait. It'll
Karma, baby. Just wait. It'll come.
Oooh, there's your magical question...
Sure, biomom has rights. She could abort, she could adopt (only with biodad's permission, though) and she could have left the baby in a trash can.
Those are all OPTIONS she could have chosen. They don't necessarily make her a good parent.
Biodad has rights, too. He could have opted to keep his d!ck in his pants, he could have worn a condom (or TWO), etc. He's a sh!tty dad and one day you may be on the receiving end of that.
Good luck.
I have a feeling one day, when you're older and more mature, you'll look back on this part of your life and see the writing on the wall...
What I meant by the question
What I meant by the question was in your opinion should she have been able to choose those things? Whether it makes her a good parent is a seperate issue and discussion.
Yes biodad could have kept his dick in his pants (it's spelled with an "i" not an exclamation point), he could have worn a condom. That does NOT,however obligate him for parenthood if he isn't ready for it any more than it does biomom.
And no he's NOT a shitty dad. We've done our best to be there for this kid. But I have 2 kids who are in the 5th percentile for weight and height and do not have what it takes to raise a violent, spoiled, out of control kid. Besides, I'd be a shitty mom if I endangered my kids wouldn't I? And I have to work for a living, there is no possible way, even if I could restrain him (I'm not strong enough to and neither is dad) I can't shadow him (keep him in arms reach and within my sight at ALL TIMES) and I don't have thousands of dollars to hire someone to do so either.
And no Karma will NOT come to
And no Karma will NOT come to me on that-b/c I would never pull the BS biomom did. I would have told said biodad the truth, and if I raised a hellion I'd deal with it my damn self and not try and blame everyone else for mistakes I made. Kay?
Oh how cute. You want to
Oh how cute. You want to judge me but you won't answer the questions that make you uncomfortable??? How convenient and telling. Guess what, jerk, it is NOT dh's fault biomom and the dude she named steppunk after lied.
She wanted him to "step up" she should have told the truth from the get-go. Go away now!
Where's your question?
Where's your question?
It's the one where I said "I
It's the one where I said "I don't think so Oi Vey." My question is "Do you think Biomom had those rights?" To choose abortion, adoption, relinquishment when she found out she was pregnant?
Well?
Well?
I answered. See above
I answered.
See above
Well next time try answering
Well next time try answering THE FIRST TIME someone asks it
Irritated, I strongly suggest
Irritated, I strongly suggest you ignore the obvious trolling and attacks....you know they aren't true, I totally see your point.
I dated a man once that didn't know about his child until the child was 4 yrs old....she did same shit your bm did...but then he was forced to pay CS (at least he got the back payments thrown out0...and slowly build a relationship. They kind of do ok now, the kid lives in a different state-He does what he can but this kind of shit is the world we live in, it doesn't make your dh a bad man-it makes the state and family law incompetent and completely unfair. Women get all the 'say and rights' for 18 years but mans rights and say end when they have sex? Are you KIDDING ME??? Too bad ethics and morality hasn't caught up w/legalities. But again, just ignore the baiting...this person does that all the time to everyone. Not worth your typed words even honestly
You can report it also as harrasement
True I can report it as
True I can report it as harassment but it's also kinda fun telling her off!! All I can say is Thank God he never lived with us and we were smart enough to call a lawyer and have the child support case dropped.
First of all who's to say the
First of all who's to say the kid is his? She lied for 5yrs, had another man sign B.C. moved to another.state for this man to raise the kid and now that the guy isn't around to take care of her kid and pay her way she wants your DH to have SS? No way, no how. I fully agree a mom has the right to abort (don't agree but she.does) to adopt it out, give it away... So why doesn't the dad? And FYI you do not have to have the dads permission to do any of this Oi Vey or whatever your name is... Oh and (Oi Vey) your vulgar comments were not needed either. Someone needs to wash your mouth out with some bleach. You are saying all this crap about Irritatedgal's DH but not a single word about how she lied, had another man raise SS and now she just wants to drop the raging lunatic SS of on DH's doorstep. What mom does that bs. What she is doing is far worse.
I do have to agree w/
I do have to agree w/ irritated on this one.Luckily my psuedo step CTBB wasn't a monster,(well a little in his teen years) but if he was, in the words of Peter Griffin, "no freakin' way"! You made the monster lady, now deal with it. OP on this site says it best, somthing like, "this isn't a village, raise your own damn kids!"