If it's behavioral, DH might want to ask her doctor how to handle it. She might have something going on that's stressing her out, and he needs to ask her doctor how he can go about finding out what's stressing SD. Maybe she needs counseling, too.

Please take her to the doctors!! My son had encopresis the accidents were just that -- a messed up body that signals were all confused. What would happen was there would be blockage and the softer stuff leaked around it. He could have multiple accidents a day then once a week to ten days he would have major large movements. One blockage was a size of a baseball :jawdrop: Right before we found a competent doctor who didn't say it was all in hi head the size of his bm was to large to flush :jawdrop:

We had to change his diet. We had to help him learn to poop on a routine. He was on stool softeners for a very long time because we had to retrain his bowels and allow them to "shrink".

So instead of helping the 9-year old, you choose to humiliate her by not providing undergarments?

Lovely.

If it is behavioural I would revert to John Rosemond's creed. She is obviously too tired to stay up late if she cannot go to the bathroom on time. So she starts going to bed at 5:30pm - straight after dinner. When she is not 'too tired' to use the bathroom properly she may stay up later.

As she doesn't do this at school or at her friends places it sounds like this is a little habit she has learnt to control her surroundings as she can. Think about it this way ... she has a BMovt and suddenl;y the world revolves areound her whether in a negative way or not. At least it is attention. Sending her off with wipes and a bucket to clean herself up away from everyone else and no eye contact at all may get the message home.

Another thing you may try is every time DD is put on the potty, her 1/2S has to sit on the toilet to 'show her how' to use the toilet properly. When both girls get a result both get a reward.

I would certainly be restricting a 9 yr old who willingly poos herself to control her environment. The trick is to let her understand SHE controls her bedtime now. IF she CHOOSES to soil herself then SHE has chosen her bedtime that night. Just remember it may be so that it is part of her nature now so it may take a while for her to retrain herself.

As for your 1.5 yr old... good luck with that. Personally I think she may be a little too young but you know your daughter. If your daughter isn't getting the principle just let it rest for a few weeks and don't blame your 9 yr old SD. Toileting is a personal thing and she may see her 1/2S pooing herself however considering how uncomfortable it feels in your pants and the smell she is likely to NOT pick up the self soiling as an acceptable behaviour.

OP, the two kids are different. The issues with SD are exclusive of potty training your one year old. Please remember that.
Just potty train your one year like you normally would.
And get SD some help. At the very least, get her some underwear.

If she has "accidents," she needs to help clean it up. She sounds like she has some pretty serious emotional issues...

Well, I have no real advice here. I know people who have potty trained at 1.5 and it has worked. Others have had to stop and try later. No reason why you shouldn't try.

Punishment doesn't work as well for behavior modification. I'd say consequence is really the answer. If you have all assurances that it is not medical, then she should clean up after herself each time she does it. At 9 she can handle it. She cleans her clothing that she soiled and the area that she messed in.

I honestly wouldn't respond emotionally to it, just maintain a neutral tone and give her the task to complete. tell her ahead of time before it happens again

"SD, children your age do not do this. It stops for most children at the age of xxx. If you cannot go in the toilet when you have to go number 2 (whatever you call it in your home) then you will have to clean up your mess yourself. Anything that you make dirty, you will be cleaning. I will not."

You have to be consistent though. If you only do it sometimes it won't work. Complete follow through.

Sorry you received some flaming. Some users will just insult instead of provide an alternative. Maybe you just ran out of undies for her today or maybe you guys are tired of cleaning it? In any case, when you can, get her undies and make her wash them when soiled. I assume you were just throwing them out for convenience.

Hopefully, your baby won't pay too much attention to SD at this time. I would say around 3 or so is when they would want to imitate and take on her habits. Hopefully you will have this resolved by then. Just treat each child separately.

My SD9 did this too. We are not sure when it started but it was close to our wedding. I honestly believe BM put a lot of pressure on SD9 to help her get DH to come back to her and the wedding was a huge stressor for her.

As far as I know, it wasn't physical, I'm not sure BM took her to a physical doctor about it. However, she's been seeing a psychologist and the episodes seem to have stopped.

She was pretty embarrassed about it and would just throw her soiled underwear in the trash.

I believe she was just VERY stressed out.

If your SD9 is doing this it's not normal. Something is wrong and it'd be a good idea to get her into counseling.

No ideas on your one year old, but the two aren't related.

What worked for me, was letting her be naked. It was possible because we were in Hawaii when she was one, and lived by the beach for two months. Once the diaper no longer held and hid the stuff, but it started running down her legs and made a mess, she became waaayyyy more aware of it. After 3 weeks she no longer pooped her pants, expect for one single time a couple of months later. She also started to dislike pee down her legs and it wasn't too much after that she did not need a diaper in the daytime. Now I know that you may not have that option, but some regular naked time each day, maybe in the yard might help make her more aware. Kids tend to stay in diapers long partly because they work so well and hide and keep everything tidy for the most part.
As far as the nine year old, that is beyond me, sorry, no advice there.

I have got your fix. Take away all of her lower half garments and let her wear diapers in public. To school, out for dinner, to her friends house, etc.....

She gets a choice. Stop now or wear diapers to school,etc..... If you want to be a bit reasonable then put her in spandex sport shorts over her diaper so the diaper is clearly visible.

ZERO tolerance. It stops now or she goes in to diapers and stays in diapers until she goes 90days with no incidents. Each incidetn resets the 90days.

That ought to fix it.

Public humiliation always works wonders when necessary. IT worked on my Skid when he had this problem at 6-7yo. It only took one day in diapers and he fixed the problem himself.

I hope I am not too late posting this. I just stumbled upon this post. My daughter has had this problem for about two years...she is now 8. I did a ton of research and know she has encoporesis. I was very frustrated before finding out what was causing her to constantly have dirty underwear. It was so frustrating and I was constantly angry about it. I had her clean her own dirty underwear in the sink once as punishment. I even threatened to buy her a pack of diapers to wear..thank goodness I did not make her wear diapers, since that is a horrible way to shame a child, and it would have been a rotten mistake on my part to do that to her. I even feel bad that I made her wash her own dirty underwear. She kept telling me she did not know why she was having accidents. I sat her down and told her how much I love her and that we are going to fix this problem. I now make her sit on the toilet every evening now sometime between post dinner and her bath time. She has to sit for a total of 10 minutes, even if she believes she is done before 10 minutes it up. She brings a book into the bathroom with her or her DS to pass the time away, and she even brings the timer and sets it for 10 minutes. And, whoo hoo! It has been a success! She now is having regular BM's in the toilet and no more mess in her underwear. If we get off track, and I forget to have her sit daily for 10 minutes, the mess will start again. So, consistency is key. My daughter has had a lot of turmoil in her life, and I believe holding in her BM's is the only thing she must feel she has some control over. I'm not expert, but this is just my opinion.