OMG! I did the exact same thing too and know exactly where you saw that!

We have a certain celebrity on this site as well. " Her" name was brought up...heh heh

Well, thing is there are stepparents that like their skids and enjoy positive messages-they just don't come to this site-or else they don't admit to it and just use it only when a vent is coming but otherwise don't speak of it. Or at least they TRY to have a better/positive outlook on their lives and choices.

They may struggle and not like certain aspects of their skids but hold some care in there....some are in impossible situations no matter how hard they try. Some dont try at all or actually initiate the tension.

A good part of this site seems to not like anything positive at all-i agree. Anyone that admist to having a decent step life is crucified or criticize for not being miserable and hating their skids.
Anyone that is being succesful or is going good you would think has more room to encourage others then those who have failed (failure comign from ALL sides of the equation) but they are looked down on and blasted for being happy or for TRYING to be happy and love their lives-or for trying to do better w/skids and their marriages.

Misery begets misery.

I don't hate anybody actually. Hate is a strong word and used much more actually than love, which is a more natural emotion in my book. Think about it, if we only loved and never knew what hate was- what a world we would live in.

I care deeply for my SD7, can't help it, I am a mom and have a maternal side to me. The problem is, SD7 does not "like" me- no matter how hard I try.

I normally bitch about DH or the outlaws anyways. I tried ONCE to blog about my own mom but had zero comments.

I was a member of another site for a really long time that I loved but when folks started getting all political - I got booted. I was friends who folks in both crowds and that was frowned upon. There was a pretty huge celebrity over there

I love this site - I don't have a ton of complain or ask about for step parent advice anymore - I just have my experiences to share.

I actually have a very happy marriage, but my relationship with my stepkids is non-existent at this point, due to their behavior.
I know at one time I felt a lot of bitterness and dislike for the situation, and for how my DH would behave, and as the kids got older they had to take some responsbility for their actions too.
I don't think I can say that I have ever hated my SK's. Their mom is another story, though.

I was in the same shoes as a lot of these posters not so long ago. I honestly don't put a lot out there about how good my marriage and my step-parent situation is right now, because I figure there are a lot of people with worse problems that need their issues to be read.

I too have a good relationship with my skids. they are normal kids for the most part. It has always been the bm that I complain about the most. I do have a wonderful husband that does back me up and sees he has to be a dad. Do I love my skids? Um not near as much as I do my own kids. However I never would do anything to make them feel less than while here. I do understand what some sm's go through and why they feel the way they do.

I also have a grip with society as always labeling the sm as the evil sm. From my experiences most sm try harder with their step kids then their own kids. Which to me very sad b/c her kids will always get the back burner and if she would just focus on her kids then her skids do have a mom and dad and their own family that focus on them. I just feel that a lot of the times sm's kids are the ones that get the short end of the stick not the skids.

i am on the fence on this ball park, although it saddens me to see so many hatful posts about skids and cursing, it's still only human and human can only take so much including all step parents. yes i agree, negative ANYTHING gets more attention than postitive's but that's just how it is.

i would be just fine seeing posts about venting about the adults, but even bio parents have to vent about their kids sometimes they just don't do it as much or as openly.

and this is a VENTING post, we all have our ups and downs, but i agree sparenting has more down's than ups (but not always).

i'll admit in MY personal sparenting experience, i try very hard to make sure kids arn't the one's to lose in the long run in every senario i'm handed, but in any divorce the KIDS are ALWAYS the loser's for something they didn't do....simply cause mom or dad or BOTH can't grow up and set aside their difference's

it's easier for sparents to "see" because we're on the "outside looking in" because we are not the parents.....and that's what makes us so evil, we can see more truth than the parents can and unconditionally loving a child who is always hateful to you because of problems mom and dad cannot set aside and grow up from, it gets old and a person can only take so much before the top blows.

there are times i hate my skids from all sides of my being for the way they treat their dad...but there are times i love them with all i have, they are my STEP kids, so i will STEP aside and let mom and dad (more mom) handle them they are her problem...not mine

Ah, I know that website, and I remember another post that highlighted similar passages. I don't think what I saw on that site was overly critical, but many responses did lack depth and the response times were very slow. I like this site, but sometimes it can be a bit negative (it is for venting, after all). It would be nice if there were a site, or part of this site, that separated the venting from the more constructive advice. It's all so subjective though, so I don't know how that would be possible. I know sometimes I feel silly posting my little vents or issues because they seem so trivial compared to the big issues that some of the posters have to deal with; on the other hand, it really puts things in perspective.

I value this website and all the posters here. It has helped me enormously to read about other people's experiences, and to be able to share those stories and my reflections with BF. My relationship with BF is very open and loving, and my relationship with the kids has (so far) been amazingly smooth. BM doesn't really cause us problems, and BF has no in-laws for me to deal with. So my complaints are pretty minimal. This site had made me ever-grateful to BF, the kids, and even BM. I still have so many, many questions though, and they are not getting any easier as time goes on. I can't guarantee that things will always be so simple, especially if BF and I got married and had children together. Anyway, despite the negativity that is sometimes infectious, I find the wealth of knowledge and experience shared by this community of posters to be one of a kind.

I find this so funny - Seriously - how many of us have criticized people on this site and ridiculed because some of us love our steps? And some dont? isnt this what this site is about? If you love your steps and things are easy and great but you have some flaws you need help with - comehere. if you want to swear up a storm and vent about how much you can't stand your steps, mother in law, father in law, BM, or how your DH is sucking and how poor you are from CS...come here. We're open to everything. I love it. And if you feel like a nutcase...you're now bipolar, and crazy from all of this and you want to feel sane - COME HERE!! haha! I don't think I've EVER seen anyone ridicule someone on HERE for liking steps...I have seen alot of uh.."I feel soooo sorry for the kids....and who cares about you - its about the kids"on here...but I just call them haters...and they probably arent really step parents who are being manipulated by little gremlin children who know what they are doing!! People who havent been in our shoes, should not comment. Yeah...that was a rant. whatev. I LOVE STEPTALK!

I love love love this site I hadn't been on any other sites but after reading this post I decided to try and find some other sites just to see. Anyway found some interesting articles on ivillage I believe they were called 16 things every biomom wants to say to stepmom and 16 things every stepmom wishes she could say to biomom... Pretty funny and I feel largely inaccurate but that's just my opinion.

I also love hearing about stepmoms that have great relationships with skids, it gives me hope. But it's also nice to know you aren't the only one not inlove with them:)

I love my skids. I come here to get advice and read about experiences of others. I would like to try to avoid my skids hating me in the future. They are only 5 so they like everyone. I am also realizing how great my DH really is! I have unexpressed thoughts in my head about BM and the skids sometimes. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in being unsure and sometimes relishing the times they are with BM.

I was so happy to find this site! DH and I have full custody of SS10. BM lives 2 hours away and DH works second shift. Since I am a college student and usually home - everything was falling on me (cooking, laundry, responsibility of care etc.) It doesn't help that I do all the "work" of mothering, but BM gets to waive the "Mother" title around - if it's convenient for her that is. I was/am starting to feel very resentful to all involved - including DH and SS. When I started reading posts here, I realized that I wasn't the only one in this position and that it's OK for me to disengage and not bust my butt trying to please someone who looks at me as a servant. I often can't share these feelings with my DH, who is my best friend and my BKs are tired of hearing it, so who's left? You lucky people!

Oh No. Please do not start antagozing ivillage again. So not worth it.

I found another site and subscribed ($5 per month).

www.stepmommag.com

It's an online magazine for stepmoms! Recipes, craft and of course lots of different articles on all different aspects of stepmotherdom.

Check it out.

I love this site. I don't hate my skids, but i do hate how they behave theres a big difference and I don't care who you are EVERY parent is going to experience frustration like this weave they admit it or not the difference is we are real and honest about it. B4 I found this site I used to sit here in a ball of frustration wishing someone understood and feeling terrible about the way that i felt sometimes after coming here I know I can vent it out someone will listen make me feel a ton better and after all that with a clear head I can get thru the weekend and I'm so thankful for that. I do love my skids but I don't love how they act and the guilty dad parenting they receive and the advice I get on here helps so much I don't know what I'd do w/out u guys just sayin...

I agree with sourgirl and helpless-there are times I REALLY need to vent! And yes, there are many times I can't stand (even hate) the things my SD, 24 does to me-I didn't give birth to this wench, and I resent people saying I should have maternal insticts to love her. I have a BS-love him dearly-SD-NOT! I married DH, not his daughter.
P.s. I love the feedback I have gotten on this site-it keeps me from going insane!

I don't like kids in general. I have no interest in actual parenting. I think the Kid is ok as kids go.

this is about the only site I've found that doesn't think im some kind of she demon. }:) and tell me to make the mister available to date some "understanding single mom" instead of me, this horrid childfree witch. lol