Just another reason why I HATE THAT BITCH!
So I moved out April 25 and my H finally got his head out of his ass. He got on medication for anxiety and has not had a drink in over 40 days now. He checked himself into treatment and is doing really well. I am cautiously happy - I have my best friend back!
I told him he'd get another chance as long as he stays sober.
He thought he was cured. He had no cravings. Then he gets a text from BM Friday morning (for those who don't know, we have a No Contact unless Emergency order in the CO. They are not supposed to contact each other at all).
The text said: "This is BM. I'm so sorry I didn't sent a graduation invite to you or any of your family. You are all welcome at SD's graduation and Open House Sunday" blah blah blah.
Oh, in her defense - she DID send the invite. We got on Saturday...the day before the graduation.
Yes, I know that H should have figured that out but since we haven't heard from SD in almost a year, I had disengaged and I am the one who would normally let H know when things like this were going to happen. Plus last I heard, SD had dropped out of HS because it was too difficult to care for the baby, work FT and go to school.
H and I went to the graduation but not the open house. My MIL did go to the open house (God, I love that woman). She made sure to loudly proclaim to anyone who would listen that we JUST got invited last minute.
I guess BM's sister was giving BM a real hard time about it and BM was getting flustered and frustrated about the situation.
Oh, BM also mentioned that she has started her daycare business so she can still not have to work, be at home with her next baby AND get paid from the government to watch SD's baby, too! Good for her, fricken psycho bitch.
Skylark...please be
Skylark...please be cautious-you know alcohol doesn't make an abuser right? I'm very surprised you have agreed to go back so soon. We all make our own decisions regarding our marriages, but from everything you have said I really dont' understand your mindset on returning. Wait for the inevitable shoe drop...hate to be negative here.
@overit2 - I appreciate your
@overit2 - I appreciate your concern.
I have not agreed to go back. I am still living at my trailer and he is still living at the house in a different town.
I have just agreed to be supportive in his sobriety. I said that it will take a long time of us being friends and supportive of each other before we can move further than that. I have made it clear that this will be a slow process if we plan on fixing our marriage. I said we would have to start all over again dating once I was positive he would maintain his sobriety.
I have told him that if he is doing it for me, don't bother. He said he is doing it for his health and his children because there are no guarantees that I will be around after he is done.
It has been quite liberating. He has had counseling and found out specific things that he was doing that would make me leave and has apologized for specific instances because of it.
I refuse to get sucked back into a situation like before and he knows it. I have NEVER before given a guy a second chance. He is well aware there IS no third chance.
We have even been able to work through issues that were real hot buttons and would constantly start arguments between us before. But we were able to talk through the issue without either of us getting mad or yelling and we both felt better about being heard/understood by the other.
He was never physically abusive but was verbally abusive and angry but had only had issues with that while drinking. So, we will see.
It's hard enough to deal with a situation like this (because I DO want my marriage to work) but to have to deal with BM in the middle of it was just way too much crap.