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BM's jealous...lol

mombydefault's picture

I have to share this, it's too funny.

My husband and I bought a new house over the Summer. We did not tell BM about it. In fact, we told ss not to tell her where we live. (Before anyone says anything, the BM somehow got it approved by the court to have my DH's address listed as the Starbucks location in a local mall so that she could be within walking distance for kid pick up arrangements. She wanted this b/c she does not have a car or a drivers license b/c her, and all females in her family, believe that men should drive women around and that women should not drive. I don't know how she got the Starbucks thing approved, but it infuriates me. Because of that I do not feel that we owe her any explanation of where we live, especially when my DH does almost 100% of the transportation. Her new husband does help out a little. She refuses to learn to drive to help out.)Anyways, she found out about the move and the house purchase. Within a few months her & her husband moved into a house. She told ss that they bought it and told him all kinds of great things about it. Her new husband, in casual conversation w/my DH, mentioned that they are renting. We don't care if they're renting or buying, but it's funny that she has to make it a big deal and lie to a 10 yr old.

At the beginning of Jan. I bought a new car. I bought it b/c my car was really old and no longer dependable. Honestly, I would rather not have to buy a new car, but it was necessity. On Valentines Day BM called ss (which she never did until recently) and began bragging to ss about her husbands new car. It was rather awkward, but funny. I guess she had to one-up me.

Suddenly BM is calling our house on a semi-regular basis to talk to ss. She never called up until the past 6 months. A couple nights ago she called DH's cell phone while we were out. He ignored the call, partially b/c we were out eating diner and partially b/c it was her calling. She called again later at 10 PM, but called from her husbands cell number. We like her husband ok, and my DH answered the phone. She was calling to speak to ss at 10 PM at night on a school night. Grant it, 10 PM is not that late, but it's too late to call a 10 year old, especially on a school night. I shouldn't be surprised though. She wanted to take ss to a White Zombie concert when he was only 5 years old, needless to say, my DH did not allow that to happen.

When she does talk to ss she uses baby talk and a super squeaky fake high voice. I don't think she realizes that even though she's barely been around to watch him grow up, he's still growing up. He's no longer 2 yrs old.

Last-Wife's picture

Why do they do this??? Our BM would always call RIGHT at dinner time, because she knew I firmly believed in all sitting down together. She thought it would garantee we would answer the phone. Even though we always told her we had a "no phones" policy at dinner time didn't stop her. Or she'd call at 10, knowing the skids' bedtime was 8:30, and then she'd bitch at us about how ridiculous it was for 5 year old to go to bed so early- (forgetting the skids had to be up each day by 6:30 to drop off at daycare).

GGGRRRR...

And mine even tops yours! We gave her a months' notice of our wedding. She rushed to courthouse the next weekend to get married BEFORE us. That was in 1998. But she can't remember that, and tells everyone they've been married for 14 years... What an idiot! LOL

purpledaisies's picture

Our bm's jealousy went so far that she down graded.

We rented for the first 2 years after we got married. Then when bm found out that we moved into dh's ex step dads house she moved out of her house. Why? B/c she thought that where she was moving to would make dh drive further to get the kids at her house. She put a clause in the DD that if she moves out of such in such county then they both have to meet half way. Now here is the kicker when she had that put in she wasn't such n such county like she thought so she HAD to move to that county but she messed up and moved to another county! LMAO

The place she had was a 4 bed room nice house that her aunt built for her and she did NOT have to pay a thing to live there. Now she lives in a small 3 bed room apt that she has to pay rent on! (she is on housing but still) LOL

Rags's picture

She knows where you live. At the Starbucks just like she told the court. If it is in the CO it must be true.

I have to say from your post that I have an amazing visual of your Skid's BM. She is a member of a freakish cult where women don't drive yet take 5yo's to White Zombie concerts. Sounds like a pseudo hippie, subservient female whack job, heavy metal head, freak commune.

Not that there is anything wrong with that I guess.

Holy crap. Where did your DH find his freak X anyway. The far side of the moon?

As for jealous Xs. They are jealous because they can't fathom that their own X has moved on to an ever better life. They have to try to play keep up with the Joneses and lie because often they are stuck in their mediocre lives because they cannot or will not better themselves. This is of course the fault of their X and not because of their own decisions.

My own SS-18's SpermIdiot, SpermGrandMa and extended SpermClan are insanely jealous of my wife and SS. They rant about how my SS is spoiled, does not need the name brand clothes he wears, nice watch, electronics, debit card with access to adequate and regular money, boarding school education, how my wife is spoiled and does not need the big new houses, regular and nice new cars, how it is not fair that they (wife and SS) have all these nice things because StepDad is rich, wah, wah, wah.....

Of course they have no problem asking him to fill up their cars with gas using his debit card when he is on visitation. That is why we transfer money to his account when he travels for visitation and transfer it out when he calls after they pick him up at the airport. That really pissed SpermIdiot and SpermGrandMa off when we started moving money in and out of his account when he traveled and while he was in SpermLand. They told SS that our moving money off of his debit card was not fare because that was CS money and they should be able to use it while he was on visitation. We countered that crap by showing SS the pertinate part of the CO and CS rules.

Then they go on to ask my SS things like "does your mom still love me (the SpermIdiot)", "does your mom still talk about how much fun we used to have (SpermGrandMa)" and regular and ridiculous crap.

They don't understand that I am not rich, just educated and professionally employed at a decent income level. They also don't understand that my wife is a graduate degreed professional and that her income provides the increased standard of living that we enjoy as a family. They regularly argue with SS that his mom only has her associates degree. He knows the truth, he was with her every step of her education journey and understands the basic difference between the different degree levels.

The SpermClan is also in some whackjob fringe Christian cult that spouts all kinds of crap that is beyond belief including female subservience to men and that women are not as capable as men. I am not talking your traditional man as head of the spiritual family and household stuff, the stuff they are expounding is just freaky IMHO.

My favorite SpermClan cult story is when SpermGrandMa told the kids that men have nipples so that if the mother dies in childbirth the father can breast feed the baby. My son called bullshit on this one and SpermGrandMa freaked on him and told him that her pastor had told her this so it had to be the word of God and true he had sinned because he did not believe it.

:jawdrop:

So, I kind of get what you are dealing with as far as your Skid's freak cult BM is concerned.

Stepmom_of_4's picture

Our situation is the same... My DH and I got engaged and moved in together on Christmas a few years ago. As soon as the BM found out I was living in his house, she moved her BF in....and within a month got engaged to him.
We were engaged for over a year before we set a date for the marriage... as soon as she found out, she set hers for a couple of months before us....Everything I planned for my wedding, she tried to do first! :?

My DH bought me an SUV because of the fact that we have a family of 6, and I do most of the transportation, so we needed something that would haul all of us safely! Not only did she throw it up in his face, in every conversation they had for months, but she went and bought a new vehicle and told the kids that her fiance bought it for her... which was a lie. The BM bought a car and puts all 4 kids in the backseat! Safe, right?

Everytime we get anything new, the BM runs around telling everyone that it is because I think I am better than everyone and he has to spend tons of money on my to keep me happy! BLAH BLAH BLAH! But, in reality, every decision we make is with my skids in mind first!!!

Rags's picture

The SpermClan spouts the same crap about us as your BM does about you and your DH.

Don't sweat it. Over time you will bury her to wallow in her juvenile attempts to keep up and bad mouth you as you and DH move on with your ever improving life together.

In the mid 90's we bought a new car for my wife. 18mos later we replaced it with another new car. SpermIdiot and SpermGrandMa ranted about this for my Skid's entire 5wk summer visitation with them.

What they did not know was that the first car made my Skid violently car sick. It was a 2door with small rear windows that made him ill nearly every time he rode in it. Since he was too young for the front seat and we did not want him constantly yacking we traded it on a 4door with big back windows that he could ride in comfortably and without getting sick.

Petty mean and evil people that we are, the SpermClan was convinced that we did it to play the one up game on them and that I was buying my wife's and Skids affections when all we were doing was adapting our transportation so that the kid was not sick all of the time.

What people like these don't understand is that we couldn’t give a flying rats ass what they think, feel or do as long as it does not adversely impact our Skids or our families.

Though it is soooo much fun to watch them make asses of themselves and run themselves to financial ruin thinking the whole time that they are competing with us. When they finally realize that they cannot effectively compete they start making up BS in attempt to disparage the motives for our actions.

mombydefault's picture

Actually BM got married 2 months before us. I'm not sure if that was to beat us to it or if it was coincidence. Either way, it doesn't really matter.