Is it really that hard!!
I have been w/ my DH for almost 11 1/2 - 12 Years we have BK - S4 - S9 and D11 - SD13 who has just moved in with us FT!! YEAH. I have had a lot of issues with this. Feeling second best and like I am a guest in my own home; she is a complete bully; BD cannot stand her - I don't mean sister stuff; I mean CANNOT stand her!She doesn't eat any of my dinners; walks right by me w/o saying a word - comes and goes as she pleases; the list in endless.
Now please don't take this as if I am saying I want my DH to tell SD that he "chooses" me over her - at all.
But just once when I am expressing my feelings or SD had done something wrong will he just stick up for me. JUST ONCE. Why is this so hard!! Simple little subtle things like this would make me feel important; like I mattered.
If you are not a united front
If you are not a united front then it will never work - do what I suggested in an earlier post - treat DH for one day like SD13 treats you - I bet he does not let you go the whole day being an asshole to him like she is to you - put your foot down now!! Sorry your DD11 has to deal with this as well!!!
Oh boy I hope you can get
Oh boy I hope you can get your DH to see the light and set some ground rules about respect. She has the upper hand right now and I don't think it will get better if DH doesn't change HIS ways. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I Agree with you; thanks. I
I Agree with you; thanks. I have a backbone when it comes to everyone else; I just don't with this issue. I think I am afraid - HE WILL say he chooses her over me!!
This choosing them over you
This choosing them over you is what scares the shit out of a lot of women on here - believe me your DH will choose you - he loves his daughter but he needs to be a father and you need to point that out to him. He will not divorce you - you may find it difficult at first but I promise you it gets easier - and the sooner that you two create a united front the sooner your SD will calm down!!
Good luck!!
PS - if she walks by you and does not acknowledge you then do not acknowledge her for meals, doing her laundry, driving her anywhere - when she needs money have DH do all of these things and see how quickly it changes and if it doesn't then at least you don't have to be a maid to the little bitch!!