Good Morning, Steptalk! Steplife is hard. Exes and kids sometimes literally suck the life right out of us. Here's a simple mind exercize that helped me a few times. If it helps even one stepmom or stepdad...how awesome would that be?

If you watch snow fall onto the branch of a tree, you'll notice that as the snow begins to build up on the small branch, the branch bends. Some branches eventually snap, fall off the tree, and die. But healthy branches bend and allow the snow to fall off to the side. As the heavy snow falls from the branch, the branch snaps back into place, healthy and strong.

Or...As quickly moving water moves down a stream and eventually encounters rocks, the water does not continue to push against the rocks. That would be pointless. Water moves to the side. It finds another, easier route. And it negotiates easily around the rocks and continues down the stream.

I visualize one of those two scenarios in my mind when things get tough with my husband's ex or one of the kids. And I use the visualization during meditation and prayer time to quiet my mind and focus my thoughts. Those are not my ideas, of course. This is just one of the many coping mechanisms I've picked up over the years. It might not help at all. But it's worth a try. Meditation and/or prayer is powerful.