We don't really know, do we?
We don't always know why any of this behaviour bothers us, do we? We feel the anger and resentment towards those around us, but don’t necessarily understand why. Unless there is something psychologically wrong with us, there are probably legitimate concerns – real reasons for us to feel like sh*t.
This forum is for us to vent, to share, to hear other people’s stories of struggle. Sometimes we welcome a word of advice, but usually we just want someone (even strangers) to agree with us. Give us a cyber hug and say, 'I believe you' or 'I feel for you'.
Demeaning drama, inappropriate comparisons, pop pseudo-psychological questioning of our motives or personality and all other such destructive ‘words of wisdom’ have no place here. We get enough of that at home.
Don’t you agree?
I wish you all peace.
RenaissanceWoman
Interesting post!!
And I completely agree 100% with that, for the most part, we are here because we need some cyber hugs and support and to hear (or read!!) someone say "I believe you" or "I feel for you".
I guess what I don't agree with is your next statement that questioning of motives or personality should not come into play here. I've defended that position on another post, where I was taking heat for a response I made to a blog. I am only going to speak for myself here... but if I am being a jerk I want people to tell me I'm being a jerk! I don't feel it helps me at all if I say something or vent about something that's completely off the wall or wrong and people say "I feel for you". Or oh Poor Stick... you are right!! Unchecked, that could lead to me being even MORE of a jerk and hurting my relationships in the process!!!
Anyway, that's just my opinion on here... and I did ask people to tell me if they don't want to hear a dissenting opinion for that very reason.
Have a great holiday!
Dissenting opinions are welcome
yes, but it sure depends on the intention behind the post.
If I'm way off base with something, I hope someone will point out the errors of my ways, in the spirit of supporting my doing the right thing for everyone. Stick, I know I can count on you for that!
But, IMO, this isn't an appropriate forum for vicariously venting hatred for others on people who seem similar here. If someone doesn't like what I'm doing because they feel they're on the receiving end of similar treatment and spew their anger all over me because I remind them of someone else, that person has crossed the line from supportive, constructive criticism into vitriol. This just stirs up drama. Don't we all have enough drama already?
I'm in crisis right now. I could use a little help. And I know I'm not the only one. I try to help where I can. I sure wish those who are focussed on hurting others would channel their energy into helping and supporting others instead of hurting those who are already obviously hurting.
Well Said Selkie
And better than I could have hoped to say it. I see exactly what you are saying about sometimes people taking a stand because they are reminded of someone else.