Have you asked her why? Does she realize she's doing it?

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Just say hey I noticed you call them brother and sister why do you call BD a step - see what she says. I think it would be interesting to hear if this is something that the BM could have directed her to do...

I am 26 years old and even though I have to have brothers from dad, stepmum I always call them my brothers.I don't really refer to them as half as for me they are full brothers. Even though we half I see them as full blood. My step-brother and I are distant because we not blood related. However I do see him as even my half-brother as my father brought him up as his own. We not close really neither me and my half-brother.
I think when you live with your mother kids seem to take their mothers skids as their sister,brother rather than the one who don't live with them and thats there actual half-sister.

Well if your hurt about your dd being called hurt then your dp maybe aswell. Maybe he could or you can explain to her what it means having a half sister and step sis/bro and say she is really more related than them too. She does not live with you? So therefore will see them as bro/sis as they live with her. Your bio dd which is her half-sister she dont know so as far as she concerned she is half. She probably don't really know your dd that well. So is your dp hurt as if she is calling her step-siblings bro/sis but maybe she sees their dad as hers aswell.Many friends of mine live with a sis/bro who is actually half-sister and to them they are full blooded sis/bro and even some who is not they see them as family. There lots of people and relatives like my step-auntie which was with my uncles who sadly passed away. My uncle had twins boy and she had a son. So because her son's half-sister mum was unable to look after her as she had mental health issues she took her on as her own. So then she took her half-brother and think my cousins the twins a brothers aswell I think. Situations are weird that way really. Try not to let it bother you too much. Maybe she just wants me to know like I sometimes don't want people to think my step-mum is mum so I have to say that my brothers are actually my half-brothers from dads side. Especially if she don't really like you she want everyone to know your not her bio-mum and to do this and not hurt her mums feelings. Do you get what I am saying. Very complicated stepfamilies. :?

Like she is being vindictive. Call her on it or say as I do to others who mention it. There are no halves or steps in my house, we are all a part of this family. My SS is very proud to have 2 brothers, a big one and a little one. He has never called either one a step or a half which is politically correct. When my toddler goes to bed, I say go say goodnight to brothers, he walks into their room and yells, goodnight my brothers, they both smile and hug him to death. It's beautiful and it warms my heart I think if my SS did throw in the word half I would be ropeable and tell him in no uncertain terms, he is your brother, if you want to play in half and steps, do it where my boys or I can not hear you!! Must break your heart.

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*

Well then you know she's just doing it to get to you. By calling her a half sister people will know that not both of their parents are the same and if they know you guys that means they know they only share a dad. That seems important to her for people to know. Maybe as she bonds with her the half will be dropped...or maybe she needs to bond with you more to drop the half. I would say let it go if you can. Do you refer to her as your step-daughter instead of daughter? Maybe she sees it the same way. I have a big family due to remarriages. I have 1 "whole" sister, 1 half sister, 1 stepbrother & 2 half brothers. When I would tell stories to someone that involved one of them, and would use brother or sister, if they didn't know them well they would always end up asking which one, what side of the family, etc to get a better feel of who I was talking about. So as I grew up I think I just learned to give them labels for others people's information. But it certainly doesn't mean I feel any differently towards my half sister than my whole sister. And I'm closer to my step-brother than I am my half brother. Sometimes its just for informational purposes. But from her response, it seems like she is a) just trying to get to you and b) hasn't had time to bond enough with her yet.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

I think your SD is just trying to hurt YOU and make you mad. If you can stand it, you could play the 'broken record' of every time she says it, you correct her and state her (ridiculous) reasoning out loud so that it makes her look as rude as she is! I had a mean older sister and we never did grow to be close, so I feel for your BD!!!

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

I think that she is just continuing on her crusade that she started when she found out you were pregnant. She is no longer able to ask when you are getting an abortion.. so now she is devaluing your little girl by calling her a half. Do you normally react when she makes these statements?? if so, dont give her a reaction.. she is just trying to push your buttons.

What does DH say in all of this? Did he stop picking up only sd early from school??? or is he picking up both or rotating who gets to go home earlier?!

Hope you are hanging in there..

She really don't like and anyone probably assuming your her mum I bet she says no she not my mum. Ever she calls you by your name or she says this my step-mom.

She would be so jealous as she is not daddys girl no more. Maybe she still is and nothing changed really since your dd been born. This would be how she feels.
She probably feels like now her sister got her parents together she must feel the odd one out.

Actually jess its kind of weird the way she feel about her step-brothers to be honest. I can understand her see her brother as her full blood brother.

I personally feel bad for your dd but I guess she feels very very resentful towards her. Yeah its not really much you can do and you really can't force her not to call her sister half.

MIL married FIL when my wife was 2mos old. My wife has three younger sibs. They are her brothers and sister ....... period. My FIL is actually closer to my wife than with his other three and they are bio and my wife is not.

As for the ZERO child. I like the concept. How about "this is the parasite kid that mooches money from my family and lives in my home but is not my kid". Facts are not good or bad they are just facts. I doubt she would like being referred to as the parasite kid so make a deal with her. Her sister is her sister and she can be your step daughter. No deal then she is just the parasite child.

I just realized that she is 11. That is a little young for the vindictive approach. I would just talk to her about it and let her know that if she wants to be referred to as her name then she can refer to her sister as her sister. If not, call her Miss (last name) or hey you.

When my son was younger he came back from visitation with the biodads toxic crap perspective that SS could not call me Dad. BioDad told him to call me by my first name. I told him no. If Dad was not longer good enough then he could refer to me as Mr Rags. He said "I like dad" and we have never had to have that talk again.

Best regards,

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

in common, which none of the others involved in SD's life have, is your H.

I see the poison in SD17 against me-and I believe it's because I am the woman now supposedly permanetly in H's life. And she doesn't like it one bit. And H, of course, compounds the problem by treating her like the queen when she is here-to let her know, I'm sure, that she remains first in his life and always will.

Saying BD has ruined her life is out and out screaming-I am jealous! I don't want to share my dad with a cute little baby.
And I don't know what the cure for jealousy is.

She calls me her stepmom, or Zen when introducing. I call her SD or Rick's daughter for clarification sometimes, (like when I'm seeing people who haven't seen me in years and they have a confused look on their face as to how I got another kid in between the two boys since last they saw me.) But usually I have taken to saying these are OUR kids- BS, SD, BS, BD. I think if I keep that up, and BM continues to fade into the background, eventually SD will drop the step with me, and I will follow her lead. Though in light of everything that's happened the past year and a half, I should maybe take the lead on that one, without any pressure for her to follow.

I think your DH should address it. SD should know it's not ok to call her sister "half" and other Steps "whole." I definitely think it's a malicious attempt at hurting you.

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

She's 11............she's practicing for those teenage years! My mom said I went through them from 12-23yrs then she started liking me again-AFTER I had my first baby. Ha!

I have 2 half sisters/2 half brothers.

I guess I was too lazy to say the W H O L E thing out, I just called them my bros....sis(es). Honestly, I didn't realize it or know better-they were just...........family.

But I have always hated that whole COLD, step-dad/father-in-law/grandma-in-law/half brother/ not really my mom/not really my dad crap. I think that is the fastest way to alienate what could be a close, strong and loving family. If there's love and we take care of each other-WE are a FAMILY. We omit the "legalities" of adding the sur names (Is that what you call it?).

My vote is with the others, of course. I am a firm believer in if you don't know something--ASK--never assume you know what the other person is thinking. ALWAYS just ask...

And you know what? When SD is 30 and has cleared any garbage BM might have pumped into her brain, I'm sure she'll drop the halfsis stuff and remember how cool you were to her.