Have to go to court
Forums:
Any experiences would be appreciated. SD was 2 when BM and my husband divorced. They got joint (50/50) physical and legal custody. He agreed to cover SDs medical insurance and pay daycare expenses. No child support ordered.
BM moved an hour away when SD was 10. SD lived with us about 65 percent of the time for the next almost 4 years, with no CS.
Husband agreed to let SD move in with BM mid-way through ninth grade. But she hasn't gone, and we just got court papers. BM wants sole physical custody and CS.
Any experience with this, particularly with getting awarded back CS from BM?
A little court experience
Check your states website and consult an attorney. My own opinion, sounds like you have a better case than BM since child spent more time with you over the years. Are there certain circumstances or reasons that BM wants this change? What about SD? Some states allow older children a voice in the process.
Hope this helps and maybe someone out there with more experience with this type of personal experience will post.
Good luck!
It's easier for everyone
If SD lives with BM and sees what she's really like. SD idolizes BM because she's only around her on weekends and gets to have fun all the time. No chores or responsibilities.
Husband finally agreed because he's tired of the arguing and fighting. But BM won't take SD without CS, and we're not in the mood to pay after we've had SD for almost four years with no CS.
Don't blame you there
Funny how BM likes to pull the bio card and the entitlement card to try and get what they want without having to give in return.
My favorite
Is that BM doesn't work. Hasn't for at least eight years. So, in the court papers, she says she is without means to pay her lawyer or court costs but that MY husband is able to do so for her.
I don't think her choice to work and leave me and my husband to raise SD makes us financially responsible for HER.
You're exactly right
I believe it's a way for them to hold onto ex....expect them to continue to pay for everything, including them, even after divorce and remarriage of spouse.
What does BM do for money?? Is she remarried??
If she tells the court she can't even pay for lawyer, how is she going to pay to raise a child day to day??? CS doesn't go very far, so is she expecting to live off the state if she gets custody??
Finances are usually taken into consideration for custody changes.
BM remarried long ago
When SD was 4. She has two other BDs, about 9 and 5. Husband works and makes about twice as much as my husband, so he supports her. And she could get a job! She has a bachelor's degree, same as my husband. She was making as much as him when they divorced.
Sounds like stubbornness
Or maybe spite. Are other two kids you mentioned from BM's current marriage??
My DH's ex won't work...thinks she' entitled to be waited on hand and foot by current husband and children and be handed everything she wants. Besides 3 SK's, BM has 2 children with current husband.
She has no degrees but could work as well, just won't.
I've worked since I was 13...for myself and to help support my family. I could never imagine just putting my hand out and waiting for someone to fill it. I feel more fulfilled by contributing to my family financially. I guess I just don't understand parents who don't want to help contribute in every way possible to help raise their kids but expect the children's SP's to help out financially....but never in any other way.
During my first marriage I was the primary financial supporter (part of the reason for divorce). After divorce, still primary provider for my son...didn't take long before ex wasn't working anymore. In fact, it's been so long, I forgot what a CS check looks like