Family photos
I have a SD14 and two BDs 4 and 1. Am coming up on time to get their photos taken and I have a dilemma.
First, our church pictorial directory is getting updated. So I e-mailed husband three days (Thursday, Friday, Saturday) 3 to 9:30 pm. He picked Friday at 7:45 pm. Problem is, this is AFTER SD goes to BMs for the weekend. I do NOT get along with SD anyway, so no skin off my teeth. But I figured, give him the option and let him decide whether to include her. He chose not to. Then, today, I get an e-mail from him saying "Too bad we couldn't include SD. She will think WE did this on purpose." What?! I let him pick, but it will end up being MY fault.
Second, since before Mother's Day he has been promising me photos of my BDs. Hasn't happened. Now that Christmas is here, youngest will be 18 months. Last time I had their photo taken together was when she was 2 months old, and oldest BD "insisted" baby sister be in her 4 year birthday pictures. Sweet! I want to get BDs pictures taken again, but husband has been complaining that we need a new family photo. Can't stand to be around SD, and sitting fees for five people is cost-prohibitive. Can find a package for two BDs that would cost only $10!
What do you think? Should I grit my teeth and include SD, or is it OK to want pictures of just my two BDs?
i understand what you mean.
i understand what you mean. i want to get family photos done, one with jusy dd, dh and me, then one with all of us. it's fine want pics of just your biokids. now tryin to get dh to go along with it, thats different.
I'm seeing this differently,
I'm seeing this differently, I guess. Remember, the SD is DH's daughter also. Excluding her is in a way, excluding part of him. Whether you like the SD or not is secondary to the fact that your family includes your SD if for no other reason than to honor your DH. To me, excluding her from something as personal as photos is just going to put a wedge between your family. I would caution against doing that.
I agree
"I don't see anything wrong with wanting pics of your daughters by themselves however I would at least get some pics of BF and SD alone and maybe a shot of the family . That way everyone is included. I know this is expensive but it may prevent problems."
You should get her in the photo
YOu never know what it'll be like in 6 months from now or 6 years from now. When my step sister moved in with my family when she was 16 she hated everything and never talked to my mom (her step mom). But now they are great friends.
Get the pictures done, if not for you, then for your kids and your husband. He loves her. I know you love her too, you just don't like her right now.
Keep the faith!!
/rant off
Join JCPenny portrait club
You get free sitting fees. We went & had family photo's done this weekend. No sitting fees & I had a coupon for all sheets for 3.99. I chose 3 poses 1 of the whole family, one of the three boys & one of just DH & 3 boys for my desk at work. I am taking baby next month for 6 month photo ( too much for 1 day for him)
When he was 6 weeks I took all three & had their pics done together, baby alone( so cute him in his daiper laying on his tummy) and one of me & him.
I think after this the big boys will be sick of picture taking ( holiday time is not the time to do this on a Saturday, I bribed everyone with DQ )however their behavior was awesome.
Don't deprive yourself of this opportunity. Have the family one done, do one of all 3 girls & one of the little girls together. Chances are oldest will be sick of picture taking by that point.
We just did family photos
To elaborate, for SD's 14 bday husband had a friend who takes photos (semi-professionally) come to our house and take photos of SD and her two friends. We also had some taken of the whole family, as well as various iterations of that. So we have the family photo covered, in my opinion.
My issue is whether I have to include SD in EVERY photo session I schedule that involves more than one person.
I don't think a 14 y/o
is gonna care if she has her picture taken with a 4 & 1 y/o. I know that the boys could have come up with better things to do than that. They did it because they know it was important to me. I have promised them that we are good for quite some time that only their brother will be going because that's what you do with babies.
You know her, do you really think that is something at 14 she would want to do?
She doesn't WANT to do it, per se
My problem is primarily with my husband's reaction. But SD is very good at scorekeeping. For example, my mother wanted a picture of all her grandchildren (my brother's four kids and my two BDs). Despite my parents always being very good to SD, she treats them like crap. So, we scheduled the pictures for a day when SD would not be here, and I do not display the photo in my house so there will be no hard feelings. But she still wanted to know why she was not included. She does the same thing with her mother's two daughters (her half-daughters) and their grandparents. Want to be included in everything the other grandparents do with their two biological grandchildren. Even though SD has two sets of grandparents herself, one of which goes out of their way to spoil her rotten.
I am just torn about how much drama I want to create in the family, but I really want a new photo of my BDs.
I think you should just do it.
She would probably complain about having to have her picture taken with them anyhow. You will never get these moments back with your two girls.
How does her mom handle the situation with the other two girls?