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What I have learned after 5 years of being CUSTODIAL StepMom

Pecanflower's picture

Submitted by Pecanflower on Thu, 01/12/2017 - 12:47pm

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will phone them on days other than just holidays.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will provide some sort of support or nurturing to her son.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will not use them to get attention from charities while never seeing the children herself.

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sunshinex's picture

Submitted by sunshinex on Thu, 01/12/2017 - 12:57pm

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will phone them on holidays at the very least.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will send some sort of card or gift on birthdays (or again, call)

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will help pay for minor things like a $20 school uniform when nothing else is paid by them, not even child support.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will drive a few hours to see them, instead of making excuses.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will avoid making promises they know they can't keep.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will not leave a baby in the bathtub alone.

A mother/parent who loves her/his children will not claim they'll be more involved "later on in life when they have more in common"

I could go on and on... I really, really feel for SD sometimes. She wants so badly for her mom to care but she just doesn't and it's sad.

sunshinex's picture

Submitted by sunshinex on Thu, 01/12/2017 - 1:04pm

Being a stepparent to a child with a crappy bioparent is difficult. It's so much easier to love them, especially when you see the hurt in their eyes when the bioparent lets them down again and again. But you never get to fix the pain they go through, no matter what you do. You can be the best stepparent in the world and they can love you so much, but they still wish their bioparent was better and you can't make it happen.

Hugs to you too!