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Downward spiral about to begin....

AlmostDone's picture

BM is bipolar and lives with her fiancé. He pays the majority of her rent and expenses.
OSD18 called me during work today, because she didn't know what to do. BM called OSD18, crying that her fiancé was dead. Talked OSD through some stuff (skids barely interacted with the fiancé, so they are upset that their mom is upset, not that he died).

I don't think he had much in terms of assets, and not sure if he had a will or arrangements to pass anything to BM, since they weren't married. I suspect BM will go off her meds, get evicted, and end up homeless as a result, stirring up a sh*tstorm of crazy in the process. Soooooo not looking forward to this.

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twoviewpoints's picture

Uh oh.

Was it a vehicle accident? Anyway, the kids are ok and safe living with Dad and you. Good thing. Bad thing is they'll worry for their mom and financially how mom will make out with him. If Mom stops meds and spirals even more so.

Does BM qualify for SSI. Maybe some other gov't assistance? I know none of is your problem, but if removes stress from the kids a nudge for BM to pursue what she perhaps qualifies for might help ease some of the meltdown.

AlmostDone's picture

Apparently a heart attack.
I don't know if BM qualifies or not. DH thinks she was probably bipolar when they were married (definitely narcisistic) but undiagnosed. She has advanced degrees and held a decent paying full time job during their marriage and for 5 years post divorce. She only became a diagnosed bipolar and "unable to work" /quit her job after I moved in with DH and she decided to try to get full custody (was 50/50), because she thought she was entitled to MY income. When the judge refused to change custody, and it turned out she made more than DH and needed to pay him child support (instead of him paying her), she became "mentally ill and unable to work" and told the judge she didn't want the kids if she wasn't going to get paid to keep them. That's how she lost all overnights.

I do believe she is mentally ill, but I also think she could self support if she wanted to. The judge decided her evidence (handwritten doctors note, not signed, not on letterhead) proved she was too unstable to work/pay child support AND too unstable to keep the kids.