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Do you attend skid's extracurricular activities?

princessmofo's picture

SS aka Quitty McQuitterson is involved in yet another sport this Spring. Dh is insisting that I and my bios attend not only the games but some of the practices as well. Dh is claiming that ss has mentioned he would like our attendance. I call bullsh*t on this. Quitty has never once mentioned this to me or my dh and has never expressed having us present at any activity before.

In addition, Twat Waffle is extremely high-conflict. I avoid her and her cloven hoofs at all costs and I certainly have no interest in exposing my bios to her. In the past, when we did attend things she was present at, she would give my kids the stink eye and ss would glue himself to her and ignore his father. So I said enough, not going to anything else.

So my question is, how many of you attend skid's activities? And if so, how do you cope with it?

Comments

NoWireCoatHangarsEVER's picture

I laugh at Quitty McQuitterson. I just said it aloud yesterday and my friend just said "what?" Funny

hereiam's picture

Misery loves company, I say, he just doesn't want to go alone.

My SD had no extra curricular activities to go to, so....

My friend went to a lot of her SS's games (and practices) in the beginning but then she finally said, "Screw this," and just went to a few games here and there.

It can be so time consuming and exhausting. I used to go to all of my brother's basketball games (he is A LOT younger than me); I love him and loved watching him play and it was great spending time with my dad, but man, it was a lot.

And that's not including dealing with the ex and the attitudes, which quite frankly, I don't know if I would have had SD been involved in anything.

If your DH keeps making a stink about it, I would maybe go a game sporadically, certainly not any practices.

notarelative's picture

Practices? Parents attend practices?
Not me. I never attended bios practices. I always dropped off and picked up. Carpooled if I could.

My bios are seven years apart. I never made them attend their own siblings games.

Does DH plan to make this reciprocal and have SS attend your bios events?

Will SS even make it to the first game? Track record says no.

Cover1W's picture

Well, first I think it's nuts to attend practices after kids are over age 7. SD10 has a karate class she's been going to for a couple years now, and loves it, and many parents watch everything and film everything, hanging alllll over their kids. Ok I get it they are your kids but jeez - I just don't have that gene. I'll watch the end of practice sometimes if I'm picking her up but that's it. I would attend her test days but they conflict with my work schedule.

SD12 just quit track after 2 weeks. She's just like Quitty McQuitterson but a girl. Hasn't finished any series since I've known her. DP is now talking up freaking TENNIS with her...talk about expenses! I refuse to talk about it with him. So no, I don't attend anything of hers any longer. Because there's nothing to attend.

lintini's picture

We live 3 hours (6 hour round trip Saturday and Sunday) away and DH has to stay at his parents house for the weekend with SS14 in order to get SS to said practices and games. It's been insane and no I do not usually go. I didn't mind baseball since it's outside and it's usually nice out, but basketball is loud inside the gym with lot's of screaming and yelling parents, no thank you. SS14 doesn't appreciate it anyways. I don't want to see BM either. Plus ...it get's real old fast watching SS14's tantrums and all the back talking he does/running his mouth when he doesn't get his way.

Your DH can insist all he wants, but it should be on your on terms if you want to go or not. I used to go pretty often, and I saw it wasn't appreciated and I didn't enjoy it, so I stopped.

WokeUpABug's picture

I go to the odd game if it fits my schedule. BM is usually there, so that is a downer. I go only if it fits into my schedule - if I have something better to do I don't. I don't feel any obligation to be there, but know it's good for my relationship with skids to show some interest.

I think going to practices is just wackadoo. I don't think I even went to my own DD's practices. Agree with the poster who says DH just doesn't want to go by himself.

Maxwell09's picture

Keep in mind my situation is pretty uncommon here, but I go to everything: school functions, soccer practice and games (BM is his coach), TBall practices and games and BioBaby10m comes along as well. It's his first year in sports so things may change but as of now I go to everything. SS4 looks for us, he yells for me to make sure I'm watching him. BM goes to all his extra curricular activities but unfortunately SS treats BM like a peer and when he doesn't have time for her he lets her know. She sits on the other side of the bleachers on her phone until she can get someone she knows to come watch the game with her and cheers for him, but most days he's preoccupied with his TBall friends so she will walk along the field gate from third base (when he's on the field) to home (when he's batting) back to first (when he's waiting in the dugout to bat or switch to his glove) to get his attention. I think it's annoying for all of us but SS4 mainly ignores her so he can pay attention to his friends or coaches anyway so DH never says anything. So to answer your question, I don't deal with BM; she barely exists at TBall. I watch the game while my parents play with BioBaby so me and DH can watch him play. I love baseball though, I've been into it and so has my family all our lives.

Soccer is a little different though. BM volunteered to be his coach which she is probably regretting now but she isn't horrible at. But again SS thinks of BM as friend instead of superior figure so he comes and goes off the field as he pleases even when she yells at him to play or drill or whatever. Soccer is on "her" time so she is in control of SS; we just show up to practices and watch. SS4 still yells for us to see if we're watching him and ignores her whole family brigade for the most part. But there's been a practice or two when he's behaved horribly and embarrassing like drinking her coke then burping in her face, picking up the soccer ball and holding it hostage from the other kids until BM "loses her attitude" (yes that's a direct quote from him to her I heard myself) and throwing tantrums on the field because even though he switches teams everytime they score a point, his team is always losing....but we sit and watch. He's run over to me and asked me how he's doing and I will say "I saw you score, but I also saw you being mean to your teammate (he wanted to be first but girl was leader so he kept yelling at her telling her she was slow and needed to go faster) ".

This is our version of parallel parenting. DH is in control on his time (Week days) and BM is in control on her days. Each parents differently on their time so we deal with a different version of SS at those times. How do I deal with BM at soccer? Again I don't, she's busy trying to keep SS on the field long enough to play or not cause a fight all the while trying to be coach to the other kids as well. Now when SS gets older and he acts like he does now on "her" time when the sports start crossing over parenting times, then I will probably go less and less and save myself the embarrassment. We'll see.

Tuff Noogies's picture

yes, even when dumb@$$ had custody i used to go whenever dh went. it meant alot to him. she used to attend games and practices way back when, but then after a couple of years she'd drop the kids off and disappear for most of the game/practice. then she quit even showing back up and we'd bring them back to her house. i did it first for dh, and also because it'd get me out of the house and spending time with him - otherwise i wouldnt see him five nights out of the week!

the only exception was after the first year lurch played travel ball. the first year was exhausting and THERE WAS NO OFF SEASON - dh and i were both soooo sick of said sport, but i was the only one with the option to stay home, so i did about half the time the second year around. i think dumb@$$ attended maybe three games in two straight years.

mofo, if i were you i'd attend some, just for your dh. it sounds like he's using mcquitterson as an excuse cuz he doesnt want to admit he wants/needs your moral support. but, that's just my opinion Smile

princessmofo's picture

Ladies, thank you for all the input. I will limit my attendance to games that fit MY schedule and that's it. Smile

HadEnoughOfEverything's picture

No and I don't particularly want to either. It's just not something I would enjoy.
The stepdaughter is starting trampolining lessons on Saturday every Saturday. Something her mum booked.
If my DP is working on a Saturday will I hell be taking her.

justanothergurlNJ's picture

My bios are teens so no they do not attend. I however do go when I can because my mere presence makes BM EXTREMELY uncomfortable and it's funny HAHAHAHAHA }:) Smile

classyNJ's picture

Yes. I usually go to every game unless both SS's are having one at the same time and DH and I will do rock paper scissors. I only go to a practice if DH is working and that's to drop off since SS17 is SS13 baseball coach. I have never been to SS17 football practice.

I only go because the games fit into my schedule. If I have to work the odd weekend or have a chance to hang with my also very busy friends - then I do that.

Rags's picture

Yep, every concert, every game, every award ceremony, every Parent Teacher Conference for years and years. At least the ones I was in town for.

DaizyDuke's picture

I went to exactly ONE of SD18 games... and that was only because it was her last game before moving to another state! (YESSSSS) Hell DH didn't even go to all of her games and certainly didn't go to practices! DH doesn't go to BS6 baseball or soccer practices either. Who cares? It's practice???

I'd be OK with going to a skid game here and there but not to every single one.

SS played soccer once when he was like 10. I went along with DH to his games and it was torture because vagina face BM2 was there and I can't stand the sight of her. I would NEVER do it again.