I suckered myself
As a long time lurker I finally broke today. I needed someone to vent to that understands. I suckered myself into thinking that since the kids refused to have contact with SO it would be fine. I mean they were getting what they wanted 24/7 partying, drugs, and alcohol with there dope dealing mom/BFF. I wish that was just hearsay or a disillusion hatred story I made up, but it isn't. SO got served with paperwork at his work for child support. Which is really funny because BFF and step kids have the address, saying child support is going up over $300 because he didn't show up to court. Well he fixed that real quick and went right over there. They sent them back to court today to calculate child support. Anyone want to guess what California child support ordered? More than the extra $300 that's for sure, in fact it is a little over 1/3 of what he makes in a month before taxes. Between what he is paying out in taxes and child support now they will get more than he does. Now due to my recent job loss this is tragic to our household. SO and I agreed that since I only needed 4 more classes in college to get my degree that I shouldn't go back to work and just finish already (7 years in the making). So guess what happens now? I get to give up my dreams to help support the household. The ex wife who is now pregnant with baby #4 from daddy #3, who is currently incarcerated, to stay with her parents and get close to what I was averaging working retail. Child support is all kinds of stupid. My Daughters bio dad has to pay a whole $50 a month because he got married to someone who has a child and had 3 more kids with her. Here SO and I don't want to have another because of finances and everyone else is catching breaks because they're having them when they cant even support them. SO is now going to be supporting 4 kids 2 of which aren't his and doesn't know(both baby daddy #3 & #4 are in jail). Ex wife and her pious mom are going to be laughing with the check all the way to the bank. I mean SD17 is already bragging about it. Thanks California Justice system for serving a major set back in progress of people actually trying to better their lives and work hard. :sick:
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Comments
Sadly this actually is true
Sadly this actually is true in California. I've known people who have gone through this.
I don't believe that is the
I don't believe that is the case anywhere in the USA. You are not forced to pay CS for kids that are not yours(bio or adopted). Yeah, there are some men out there who agree to help support former stepkids after a breakup, but that is a choice they make on their own,not court ordered.
My SO also pays 1/3 of his
My SO also pays 1/3 of his income to BM and is liable for the SKids health care although he can't afford it. The system isn't right but I don't see any real changes for dads on the horizon.
Yes, they refuse to see him
Yes, they refuse to see him and are old enough to do so. Mom, has no rules. She drinks, does drugs, & parties with them, so of course they don't want to come to a house that doesn't allow it. Family says SD17 is an alcoholic already & SD13 is so addicted to pot that she can't function without it.
I think the OP see's the
I think the OP see's the additional money as being for the other children. Not the judge ordered her spouse pay for the children.
"2 step daughters 13 & 17. I
"2 step daughters 13 & 17. I thought them refusing to come see SO would mean we could move on. Boy was that a fantasy"
Why would you think your SO would not seeing his kids meant a free pass to 'move on'? Parents are required to support their children as long as they're considered minors. No state just pulls a random stick-to-ya' amount outta a hat. CS is based on your state's laws and guidelines. And absolutely no state makes some guy pay for any children who are not legally their responsibility (well except for the American taxpayers who end up supporting all the children no one else either will or can support **shrugs**)
So you're not working currently and receive a lousy $50 a month CS for your own two biological kids, 10 and 16. How are you financially supporting these two on $50 ?
Sounds like the guy was
Sounds like the guy was supporting the OP's bio kids. If she isn't working and her ex only pays $50 a month, someone had to be picking up the slack.
Kind of odd to complain about him supporting kids that aren't his in BM's home, when he's doing the same in his own home. :? I just don't understand how you can complain about BM, when you nor your ex were supporting your kids.
Leftover tax money &
Leftover tax money & financial aid from school. He was paying all the household bills and please see my latest comment. California law states they are allowed to take up to half his income before taxes.
Just guessing but I bet not.
Just guessing but I bet not. Currently pregnant, living with the GBM, spawning with criminals, partying with drugs n alcohol with her teen kids... doesn't sound as if BM has time to for employment.
Time share is a factor in determining CS in California, so not having the kids at all now did indeed play a role in enabling the BM to file for change in CS. California also goes with both parents income in calculations, the BM could be figured at California minimum wage if she is not working as she would have the potential to earn at least minimum wages. California law/guidelines are online and the OP could easily run a quick calculation.
Sorry I was really upset last
Sorry I was really upset last night. Only two of his ex wife kids are his. I said he will be supporting all four because she refuses work. So it will be his child support payments paying for all of them (she got off welfare because she knew she would get more in child support if she wasn't). As far as being upset when when he supports my kids. No I have always supported my kids he has always only paid half rent, bills, utilities, and so on because we couldn't come to an agreement on what was necessary. As far as him supporting me and my two for 6 months while I finished school, I did it all the time for him and even paid for things his kids needed when younger at times he was fired from his job because of his ex wife, laid off due to weather and when he went through school. This was finally to be my chance to finish. I haven't finished reading everyone's comments but thanks for all the understanding. I'm just angry as hell. This isn't the first time in our almost 11 year relationship I put my dreams on hold (sorry for spelling punctuation and grammar, I'm on my phone)