This is about my BS, who is 14.

Last year EVERYONE (my skids, my husband, my mother and father, people at church, anyone else I met) wished me Happy Mother's Day. My then 13-year-old son was there. He heard them. He didn't say a word and I had to make a point of talking to him about it at 7pm at night. He said he was waiting until he gave me his card. I pointed out that he had all day to do it AND all the people who wished me well. It would have cost him three words.

So, this year, I'm thinking he set the bar so low it couldn't go lower. Boy, was I wrong. He did nothing about Mother's Day until late Saturday evening, half an hour before he was to go to a friends house for an overnight. This after I made outright statements about it coming up to both him and DH for the last 10 days.

DS texts me early morning asking to be picked up. I go get him. It was a 5-10 minute drive. Nothing. I am around all morning and go exercise at noon. Still nothing. I come back from exercising and am around for about 30 minutes. Still nothing.

(It should be mentioned his bedroom windows are right at the back of the house where everyone comes in/out. There is no way he missed that someone...maybe me...came home.)

I run to my mom's and decide I'll do something to treat myself for mother's day as it looks like nothing is happening, so I treat myself to a movie.
I get a text message from DH asking if I can get home in time to go out with my family...as of the morning he and BS had no plans for me for the day...and I told my mom I didn't want to go. Apparently they (my mom and DH) decided otherwise. I text back no, I can't. DH also texts me that he talked to BS and BS is going to apologize for not saying/doing anything yet. Fine. I go home though I don't want to, I'm expecting it not to go well. I should have gone with my gut.

BS gives me a gift and card and wishes me happy mother's day. It's 5pm. He beat last year's record by 2 hours. He asks me what's up, that it looks like I'm waiting for something. I didn't want to say I was waiting for the apology since I didn't think he knew DH had texted me. I got nothing. When he went past DH he told DH that "we're good." Now I'm upset because I was expecting an apology and he didn't do it. I'm upset with DH for setting my expectations.

Rather than go talk to BS about what they had talked about, DH says I should tell BS how I feel. I think this just makes me the bad guy again, but fine. I tell BS. Even tell him I took myself to a movie. He says he would have gone with me. I said that he doesn't even want to be seen at a grocery store with me, how would I know he'd want to do a movie? He said it's mothers day, so he'd go.

We eat dinner at home. I ask DH if he'd go to a movie (sure I'm willing to go to another one as I'd like to take BS up on his offer and do something). DH says yes. I go ask BS if he'd like to see the Avenger movie (thinking I'd offer something appealing). He said that he really didn't want to but knows he has to since it's mother's day so he guesses he could even if it's not something he wants to do. I just said fine and walked away, but the look on my face must have reflected how horrible he just made me feel.

I went to do some more laundry and BS comes over and says he was kidding. I am facing into the washer and I just start crying. I just can't believe this day.
1. BS had the chance to be the first to say happy mother's day and he didn't.
2. BS and DH went to get something for me at the last possible moment.
3. I haven't told them this part but they got me a potted flower and it's the one and only flower I hate.
4. DH tells me he talked to BS but when BS doesn't apologize, I have to go exact one from him. And I'm set up to expect one.
5. DH and my mom arrange for us to go with the family for dinner when I said I did not want to.
6. DH tried to make it better by saying he was going to get my favorite cake from the store but didn't. Uh, thanks? He made a cake but then had to run to the store for frosting. I love white cake with white frosting. He knows this. He made yellow cake with chocolate frosting. (could have gotten me the cake I like)
7. BS telling me he'd go to a movie, telling me he doesn't want to but knows he has to, and then trying to tell me he was kidding.

I turned on BS and asked him how the hell I was supposed to know he was kidding when he talks to me like that all the time. And that I call bullshit on his kidding, that he meant it. I spent the night awake either crying or dreading going in to work. I am in a small office and the only mom. Everyone will ask how my mothers day was. And, I had asked for a plant for my desk and now I have the flower I hate as teh thing I'm supposed to take in and put on my desk to remind me of one of my worst days. I hate lying so it would be untrue of me to even say my mothers day was "fine." It wasn't fine.

I am not at work. I am working from home because I am still on the verge of tears and I look and feel like shit.

I am supposed to go out tonight for a cousin's birthday and I just really don't want to see them either as I don't want to talk about yesterday and I know I'll burst into tears if they ask, and it should be fun for my cousin, not a sob-fest from me. I might ask my mom if I can drop off the gift with her as my mom is going, too.

Happy F-ing Mother's Day.

P.S. we don't do the mother's day/father's day trade, you get it if it falls on your weekend and right now I'm hoping next year that I don't have BS for mother's day. I don't think I can take how much worse it could get.