So with the financial stuff and a heated "discussion" (I was hot under the collar and did the discussing) with DH. I did some calculations and looked up a few things to figure out how to make this right for me. (See previous blogs where DH makes a decent salary but really can't afford all the latest expenses and it has all been paid because I'm here with my paycheck.)

I know DH doesn't believe he sees me that way but it sure seems like I get treated that way quite often. Just because he isn't a jerk about it doesn't mean it's not happening.

He really had no clue how much was spent on the lawyer and GAL. His response was to tell me I supported him and what should he have done, not fought it? That wasn't my point.

(Rant on)
He sets up stuff with BM. It doesn't go into the calendar app until: he says something about a plan, I am surprised, he gets defensive that he told me/it's in the calendar, I point out its not, and neither are the other bunch of things he mentioned that I didn't know. Not that I have anything I have to do, but it's helpful to plan around for me and BS.

I guess I don't think that way and it makes no sense to me.

To me love is a feeling but also comprised of respect, friendship, tolerance, and acceptance...and some lust.

I loved my ExH but he did things so that I lost all respect for him as a spouse, we were no longer friends, I could not tolerate his behaviors, and those things combined to kill any lust for him. Do I still respect him? Yes in some areas. Are we friends? Most people would classify it as friendship. We tolerate each other but don't have to tolerate everything. And no, there is no lust.