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Help me please

legmel's picture

Submitted by legmel on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 12:19am

I have been on the site for about a few months now. It has been my saving grace.
My husband has 2 daughters 22y and 14y, the eldest does not live with us thank god! She is manipulative – bi-polar, border-line, had a baby a year ago, does not work etc. SD14y lives with us full-time and sees her BM EOW.
Earlier this week our housekeeper pointed out to me that she had on occasion found soiled panties with pads in it in SD’s cupboard. She asked me to please have a look at the state of SD’s room and cupboard as the smell emanating from it was disgusting.
So I tell my DH this on Monday evening – the hell that has broken out! Firstly me and the housekeeper are liars….SD told him that she had never ever put soiled underwear in her cupboard. I reminded him how many countless times we have discovered dirty socks, school shirts & panties already in her room. NOOOOO this time is different we are lying – I hate his daughter. How is her untidy cupboard affecting me….I am ready to walk away from this crap. Each week it is something else – does it ever get better?

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legmel's picture

Submitted by legmel on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 5:31am

Thank you guys – it’s just so frustrating. I unfortunately did not take a pic. The previous time she denied having done something I had the evidence in the form of photographs. She already hates that I make her do her own underwear and socks! Their father would wash their soiled underwear. Let’s see what happens tomorrow as he wants to dismiss the housekeeper for having lied – no princess is NOT lying *barf*
Sally – I don’t even want to set foot in that child’s room – she is supposed to be on an eating plan (she is about 20kgs overweight) she demands that her father buy her salads for lunch – but her room bin is filled with empty sweet, chips wrappers.
When I told him about the smell – his response “I will buy her new underwear, socks and shoes”?? I told him I have shoes and socks in my cupboards that are over 10 years old – my dressing room does not have an odour? He was so abusive towards me – I am still trying to figure out why he had such an outburst.

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 8:20am

My cleaning lady came to me one day and said I am not going in SS's room anymore if there are dirty clothes on the ground. So he was told by me and DH. He loves when she makes his bed and didn't want to give that up. So now if I remind him that she is coming in the morning, he picks it up.

Just do not let the cleaning lady clean her room. Mine only does basics in the kids rooms. No wiping anything down, just vacuum and sheets. I am not paying her to clean their room. That is what they should learn. Cut her off at the knees.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 8:29am

"maid"? "cleaning lady"? what are these??? lol!

i would give my left tit for a cleaning service. and NO, he/she would be spared the kids' rooms. AND their bathroom for that matter.

Ninji's picture

Submitted by Ninji on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 8:52am

I was thinking about getting a cleaning lady to come in once a month to do the windows, dust, etc...but I was told it was around $200. Maybe I'll do it once every 6 months.

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Mon, 02/16/2015 - 10:08am

I pay $85 every time she comes. She is here for about 4 hours and does all the heavy cleaning. I do it every two weeks. Used to do it monthly, but the last two years have gone to every other week. I work from home and I do not like to clean, but like a clean house.

blending2012's picture

Submitted by blending2012 on Fri, 02/13/2015 - 12:51pm

He may thing she is lying that the housekeeper said something at all. Next time, if the maid tells you - say "Can you tell my husband please? He doesn't believe it when it comes from me."

legmel's picture

Submitted by legmel on Mon, 02/16/2015 - 6:31am

Hi all - yes, we have full-time housekeepers, load-shedding and NO Walmart. Seriously though ripleyV2 I do think that sub-consciously I am curt and have a tone. She tolerates me, only because she does not have choice - she cannot live with her mother (BM lives in a bachelor apartment with her boyfriend and SD14 has to sleep on a blow-up when she stays over at BM). So she has to bear and grin it. I was ready to walk away last week - she had gotten on my last nerve. I agree he is way to protective over her.

It is her bday tomorrow - thankfully I have board meeting starting at 16h30...don't need to sit through that torture.