The Dreaded School Project

Remember that "school project" that SS was supposed to get together with some classmates to work on?

It's due today.

SS was supposed to get together with these guys on Monday but instead played on the PS3 all day.

I asked SS and DW about a dozen times about it and all I got in response was that SS can’t get in touch with these friends.

This morning, when DW went to wake him up, he started right away with the waterworks. Apparently these friends ditched SS and decided to do the project on their own.

DW writes a note for the teacher saying that SS tried to get together with his friends but they didn’t answer his calls.

I looked at DW and I shook my head.

But now, I am not sure what to believe.

My initial thought on this; SS is a lazy-ass who will not go out of his way for anything, and now that the project is due, goes running to Mommy-dearest expecting her to bail him out.

Now I am thinking – “You know, if I was forced to work with a freaking idjit like SS, I would probably ditch him too.”

Report card in two weeks. Buy your shades and nuclear blast protective gear now folks.

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Draco, Email the teacher.

Draco,

Email the teacher. Flat tell her the kid spent all day monday on the PS3 and did NOTHING to contact the other kids.

At least ONE adult in this kids life needs to be capable of telling the truth.

Do you really think I should?

Do you really think I should? I mean....DW wrote a note saying one thing and my message will be saying something different. If I was the teacher, I wouldn't know which parent is telling the truth.

The only thing I can think that *might* work is to suggest that SS be made to do some extra work to be able to make up for the lost grade somehow, but I do not know how much this project is worth.

Do you really think his

Do you really think his teacher doesn't already know he is a lazy slacker?

I assure you... the teacher is WELL aware of it.
He/she is also well aware of the tall-ones helicopter mommy who will come hovering to the rescue anytime "the precious" is threatened.

And personally, I think it utterly SUCKS that your DW threw those other kids under the bus.
She has NO idea if her son actually attempted to call them or not.
For all SHE knows they were trying to get in touch with him and he was ignoring their calls so he could keep playing video games.

Frankly if I were the mom or SM of one of those kids, and my kid was accused of that... over something worth a grade.. and the other parent had no proof, their kid was a known slacker and the mother did not even ATTEMPT at any point to verify the slackers story? My ass would be in the office and all hell would be breaking loose...

And who would it be aimed at?

Your DW who accused MY kid without knowing the facts.

Your right, DW doesn't know

Your right, DW doesn't know if SS made any attempt to get in touch with those other kids. But DW trusts SS.

I on the otherhand....know that SS is lying about everything and anything involving school and school work.

Unfortunately, SS has DW completely snowed. Even when I presented DW with logs, emails from the teachers, etc. DW would still believe SS's side of the story.

I know it puts me in a very difficult position. How can I push SS to succeed when SS has DW wrapped around his finger? It's getting to the point where I need to take some serious measures, but I want to wait until the next report card comes.

It pisses me off because when

It pisses me off because when DW agreed to go halfsies with SS on the PS3 for Christmas, I KNEW situations like this was going to happen.

Is it possible for the PS3 to

Is it possible for the PS3 to have a little accident? So that it's not in the way of his learning, of course.

It's possible that SS

It's possible that SS couldn't get in touch with his friends that day because the project was already done, so they didn't bother with him. Meaning, SS didn't lie, exactly - but he also didn't participate when the OTHER KIDS tried to contact HIM. He figured they'd wait 'til he was ready at the last minute - he was wrong. *shrug*

What he said was true, from a certain point of view.

But I still think he bears responsibility for not participating in the project. If he'd made several efforts to get in touch with the other kids MUCH earlier, and they were "ditching" him, he could have gone to the teacher. The fact that he waited until the very last minute and then did NOTHING when he couldn't reach them means that this is still ENTIRELY his own fault regardless of what the other kids did or didn't do.

Wait, so he knew they ditched

Wait, so he knew they ditched him when he woke up? And decided to talk about it when it was too late to do the work?

Do you ever wonder if your skid is stupid like a fox? My brother is the king of playing dumb to get out of shit. He broke the blade on the ride on mower (by running over things) so many times he doesn't have to mow the lawn anymore.

Scubed, You need to run with

Scubed, You need to run with the extended ending:

SS will turn on the waterworks.
DW will IMMEDIATELY become offensive with talk of suing the school for injuring SS's fee fees.
Then she will turn on Drac0. How DARE the entire world lie about her son--how DARE the ENTIRE UNIVERSE be wrong about her son.

... cuz he had a hard day at

... cuz he had a hard day at work of course.

I think emailing the teacher

I think emailing the teacher is the worst advice I've ever seen on this site. Oh help me if my husband every did that to me. Although... I have been blessed with a backbone and would have punished my son for being lazy in the first place.

Aside from that, I can't believe this 15 year old is crying over this stuff.

15 years old? Most 15 year old boys I know won't cry for anything or anyone. Does he not have a set of balls on him? Or some pride?

That's why I mentioned it was

That's why I mentioned it was the worst advice!

No he doesn't. Whole reason I

No he doesn't.

Whole reason I said email the teacher is this kid has mamma wrapped.

He lies to mom she buys it. And babies him some more.
BD doesn't care unless whatever it is MIGHT annoy the BM.

The only damn adult in this kids life who is actively trying to ensure the kid grows the fuck up is Draco.
And his DW castrates his every attempt.

Yes but emailing the teacher

Yes but emailing the teacher after his wife gave a note covering for Tall kid to blow both their stories out of the water says that Drac0 doesn't care that his wife is going to come out as a liar as long as he gets to burn SS.

I know that he's trying to raise this kid right and she's a roadblock but I don't feel that it's every good marital advice to go behind your wife's back to 'tattle' on her kid to the teacher.

What they need is to seek counseling.

On average, SS cries about 2

On average, SS cries about 2 or 3 times a month.

The next time he'll be crying is in two weeks when his report card comes in.

Although, by the way I will react, DW will most likely be crying too.

Agreed.

What do you mean he couldn't

What do you mean he couldn't get a hold of them? Does he not see them in class every damn day? I'm very sick of the Group Project Crisis every semester myself. It's always the "mean" or "stupid" other kids fault that SD15 can't participate or got a bad grade. Every damn time.

I don't care if the other kids ditched him or not. He was planning on the tears on Monday morning play from the very beginning.

Mom should have intervened a long time ago to make him a more responsible and likable kid but that ship has sailed. So in the here and now she should require him to do the project on his own. Once he has to do all the work, he may figure out it's to his advantage to be friendlier with the other kids and get on board for the next one.

I am attempting to put myself

I am attempting to put myself in the tall-one's position. Assuming that he is telling the truth, of course.

The main difference being, by the time I was 15, I was very self motivated. I was an A/B student at school and had two PT jobs after school and on weekends.

If I had a group project and couldn't contact the other kids? I would either have marched on over to one of their houses and bugged them or casually "tattled" to their parents that we had this big thing due and I'd been trying to contact them.

-OR-

I would have just done the damn project myself!

If I would have not done either of these things and then waited until the due date to cry to my parents? They would have said that I should have mentioned the issues to them or the teacher way sooner and that I'd better see if the teacher would be nice enough to assign extra credit so I could attempt to strengthen my grade! They would never have written a note like that!

I feel for you Draco. I just

I feel for you Draco. I just don't do it anymore. I can't. DH or I always end up calling or emailing teachers at the end of the marking period asking to accept this or that because SS didn't do it. I told DH I'm done. I'm not going to do it anymore. We told SS that it will never happen again. It is his responsibility to do his work and if he doesn't then it is his choice to fail. And I'm forcing DH to stick to it. It's hard. But I'm tired of stressing over his school work. DH and I have an understanding that no adult children that are not working will be living in our home.

Dis-engage! The teacher

Dis-engage! The teacher knows the tall one is a lazy idjit. And yeah the "friends" probably were achievers and didn't want lazy tall-boy to take credit for THEIR work.

I see this with Chef's kids. All their "friends" are drugged out, half-witted underachievers.

Birds of a feather.

And as far as you pushing this kid out the door because he's going to be a FTL: that will never happen as long as DW is NOT on board with your parenting technique and undermining everything you do.

Her non-parenting will ALWAYS trump actual honest-to-god parenting. Children, like water, will take the path of least resistance.

True, but as it has been

True, but as it has been said, you can't care more than the actual parent(s). Even if he doesn't disengage, the tall one will be a FTL and living in the basement for a looong time after his bios are productive, independent citizens.

He can proclaim a clear

He can proclaim a clear conscience now and maybe, just maybe, his wife will take a new interest in Donkey Kong. . she and the tall one can be reunited as one big happy non-parenting family!

I look at Drac0s blogs as actually being from the Girhippo's husband. I can only imagine what HELL he must be going through these last six years with her helicoptering, coddling, and massive excuse making for her rotten parenting. StepDaddyBigBucks must be on some sort of OPIATES to get through THAT!

Is DonkeyKong remarried? His 2nd wife/GF MUST be hoping by now that he will get back together with Drac0's wife (as I hope that somehow StepDaddyBigBucks will give up; that Chef can get back together with the Girhippo and the spawn of their conjoined loins.