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DH's weird comments and update from yesterday

Gabriels Mom's picture

Submitted by Gabriels Mom on Mon, 07/14/2014 - 10:04am

Update:

DH took SS to the doctor...no infection-SS needs to wash LOL

DH went into the bathroom with SS last night and instructed him yet again on how to wash his body and his hair. I can't imagine how embarrassing it is to have your dad watch you shower at 12 because you can't seem to do it. Whatever-hopefully it sticks.

DH's weird comments:

1. He said he feels like he can't take care of anything anymore because of me. He took them to the waterpark yesterday and when he arrived realized he grabbed my pass instead of SS's pass. He said his first thought was to call me and ask what he should do. Which made him mad so instead he went up to the ticket counter and explained what happened and they looked up our account to verify that we did indeed have 4 passes so they just told him to use mine. He did what I would have told him to do anyway. But he says that makes him feel like he can't do anything....IDK I thought that was weird.

2. He said he wanted to go to the park and cook out next weekend. I said okay and then he said "I mean I know SS won't be with us but I'd still like to go just me you and DS" I said "okaaaaay. DH, I love when SS is with us and I like to include him in everything but he's not with us all the time and I have said before that our life doesn't stop because SS is at his mom's. So we will go to the park with our son and fire up the grill and cook whatever." He said "Okay, yea, good." Weird

3. We were watching Ray Donovan last night. For those of you who don't watch it it's about a fixer from Boston and he "fixes" issues for movie stars and athletes. Dead hooker in your bed? Wife shot your mistress? No problem we'll fix it for you. So last night was wife shot the girl her husband was f*cking. Just in the arm. Ray came and picked up the injured girl. I said "Take her wallet and toss it, drop her off somewhere and tell her to call the police and say she was mugged." That's what Ray ended up doing. DH looked at me and said "You could totally be a fixer. You'd be great at that job." I have no idea how I'm supposed to take that comment. Ray is a thug that gets paid well to cover up crimes and threaten and beat people with baseball bats...

Comments

ltman's picture

Submitted by ltman on Mon, 07/14/2014 - 10:27am

Lol, just take the compliment. It's guy view, you get shit done quickly and effectively.

zerostepdrama's picture

Submitted by zerostepdrama on Mon, 07/14/2014 - 10:45am

For what it is worth:

1. He basically is realizing that you take most control over the household and handle it. My DH is an idiot. He lived on his own before me and did just fine. I come into the picture and now all of the sudden he doesnt know how to check his email or update his resume. He relies on me too much. So possible with your DH he is just realizing, hey I rely on GabrielsMom way too much for stuff that I can figure out on my own. But since I am a man, I just usually take the easy way out and play dumb and let my wife take care of it, because well the wife does such a good job at it.

2. Guilty dad and he feels like he can't do anything "fun" without his oldest. However he realizes or is realizing that life doesn't stop because SS isnt around. This is a good thing.

Gabriels Mom's picture

Submitted by Gabriels Mom on Mon, 07/14/2014 - 11:02am

Oh yea he lived on his own for years before we met and now he can't do anything. So annoying.

It took me a few years to cut out the guilty daddy crap. I'm glad he's realizing that it's not fair to punish DS by staying home all weekend because SS isn't home. I also think it's a punishment for SS to have to do something he thinks is endlessly boring because DS likes it. So we can do those things on the weekends. I have been saying it for years.

Aeron's picture

Submitted by Aeron on Mon, 07/14/2014 - 11:10am

I had DH look at me as I snorted over comment 1. So of course he needed to know! He then spent about 20 minutes trying to explain man brain to me. Apparently comment 1 has something to do with your DH wanting to be alpha over everything in his world and getting pissy when he realizes that he isn't the master of all roles in the household. My DH said most guys he knows go through this at some point after they get married.

What I got from what my DH said is that your DH doesn't want to feel like he's dependent. He wants to be the strong independent man and he had a light bulb moment going oh crap, I never take care of this kind of stuff on my own anymore, wtf. And that he might be feeling extra useless since he obviously hasn't been able to teach his kid to even wash properly.

Comment 3, we both agreed all he meant was he thinks you're a great problem solver and sometimes a compliment from a guy is just so not the way a woman would give a compliment....

step off already's picture

Submitted by step off already on Thu, 07/17/2014 - 4:34pm

I can relate.

DH and I went to breakfast this morning at a spot we go to often. I ordered. When the waitress looked at him for his order, DH looked at me and gave me the "you tell her" look. So I ordered for him. Then she asked him a question, something like, "do you want the gravy in a bowl or on the rice?" and the man serisuously looked at me again with the look. I had to ignore that one and let him be a big boy and let her know if he did indeed want the gravy on the rice or in the bowl.

Men rely on us so much. They hate that they do, but they do.