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Talk about stupid luck....SD is a damn train wreck

Jsmom's picture

So I haven't given an update on SD17 and our fiasco over the holiday vacation because honestly, I can not discuss it without wanting to kill something. I just picked up my SS15 to take him to the ortho and who almost hits me flying into the HS parking lot, my SD17 who apparently is skipping first and 2nd period. Well I flip around to try and confront her and ask why she is coming to school late and she had seen me and rushed to get into school. But, I saw her and she glared at me before going in the door. I called the attendance office from the car and asked what her note said, thinking maybe BM sent her to therapy like she promised us. Nope! She had a headache and I signed the note. Clarified it wasn't me, it must have been BM but I don't see how she works a lot and we know this is a problem of SD's. So they asked me to verify if BM signed it, so I call DH and fill him in and try and go about my day. Telling him that if BM didn't sign it, I am telling the school. Well BM is working and since Thursday is a 12 hour shift for her, pretty clear she didn't write it. BM hasn't called DH back. So I called the school and told the lady to verify with BM if she signed it, but I thought that BM may cover for her. They tell me she did this last week to.

My 2nd call to DH to see if BM called back, I told him I was telling the school what I knew and it was up to them to proceed. So now they will call BM to verify the note. I told her she may want to verify any others she had.

Let the chips fall where they may. That kid knows I saw her. It will come back to me, but I don't care. You played us on that vacation. You ruined my vacation and you are playing everyone around you. I will not let you play me anymore. She is not welcome here and I told DH if BM doesn't punish her in some way and stick to it, then when all hell breaks loose, do not call us. We will not help you....

I may not have custody of you, but I will parent you in some way, however I can. I also, did something else about a trip she was planning for a mission trip and her bragging about not working and going for the pot and fun in the sun. Not fair to this pastor, so I happen to know someone and got his information and told him what happened and that she is bi-polar and not being treated properly and it was not fair to him to take her to Haiti for a mission trip and if something happened we are still liable. Needless to say she doesn't know what I did, but they are not taking her or her drug-addicted friend.

I may only be your SM and have no custody to try and parent you, but I will sure as hell not contribute to your delinquency. Raging bitch session over....One done SM.

Comments

Jsmom's picture

Glad to hear someone else is holding their Stepkid accountable. The shit is going to hit the fan on this and I do not care...I was literally taking her brother back from the ortho and had the damn dumb luck to be coming out as she was going in at 10:45 in the morning. I do not believe in coincidences. I really think that I was trying to disengage and god doesn't want me to. I am starting to think she is going to kill someone with that car and my DH is incapable of dealing with BM and BM is afraid of her.

If she lived here I would cut off everything and attempt to get her on track, but I honestly think that ship is sailed and all I can do now is protect my home and my two boys from her.

SituationalTourettes's picture

Excellent job! I would've done exact same thing. I will not willfully stand by and allow a child, mine or otherwise, to harm or endanger anyone else even peripherially. Also sounds like this girl has gotten way out of hand.

Did I read this correctly? BM IS AFRAID OF HER DAUGHTER? Wth is THAT? What kind of a wimp mother are you to allow your kid to get to the point where you have lost such parenting control that you are afraid of your kid???? Why isn't this girl under treatment for the bipolar?

And why is DH incapable of handling BM? She's nuts? He's nonconfrontational?

Jsmom's picture

There is a long back story to this situation. In summary, BM PAS'd my SD to sue us at 14 and after fighting it we gave up so we could raise my SS who didn't want to live with BM. My SD is out of control and about 3 months ago she wanted back in our family. So we took her on vacation with us and she was horrible and we had to send her home half way through.

BM knows she is out of control but works so much can't and won't deal with it. Their has even been an issue with the police and SD telling them that her Stepdad tried to strangle her. I can see now why he did. SD can push you very hard and she definitely has rage issues. BM is unable to give consequences. Weakest, worst mother I have ever had the privilege of meeting. I have no contact with BM other than a few emails in 9 years. DH tried to give her guidance recently even going so far as to draft an email on how to punish her. Nothing happens.

Now, BM has figured out that my SD is forging her signature on these notes and BM has to go to the HS today to see them all. Good, maybe you will finally do something or at least the school will. If she can't punish her now, jail is in future and they will not let you manipulate them.

As for your question about DH being non-confrontational. He did years ago and every time he did, BM lied. Again and again. Now it is apparent she has no clue and he won't yell, but he has been making sure every single time we see or hear something, he tells BM. It is working a little bit, since she has stopped posting stupid stuff on the internet. But, she is still out of control. My hope is BM wakes up soon, before we are picking her up off the side of the road. Then, my dream of telling BM she sucks as a parent, just won't be any fun....