So step kid that we don't see. We didn't give a gift to. Well because we don't see him. He refuses to not only see his dad, but won't reply to texts or answer calls. Please know this is a response to parent alienation. The kid is 17 and a year ago the custody evaluator talked to my DH & told him there was really nothing that can be done for him because of his age. The other two are in counseling and bio mom has to attend too... But the oldest. Nope. So we talked. And decided. Getting him a gift would be nothing more than "checking him off the list" that's the only reason or thought behind getting him a gift. Period. And no matter what we get it's going to be heckled, berated & probably trashed or regifted. We discussed money but again, why? To say we did? So we didn't. Nothing. Extended family have asked about him. We are exchanging with family next week. I suggested inviting him to the exchange and if he comes, he receives and no other way. Why get a gift for someone who can't even spend 1 hr with you? I know he has a crap mom who would flip a bitch if he came but... He's 17. Time to do what's right. You're a big boy now. Act like it! It's a hard situation all around. But when do you hold them accountable for their rude behavior??? Is 17 old enough?