CS question -Posting as a BM

OK, so a couple of months ago my ex took me back to court jumping up and down how he wanted a month in the summer with the kids. Ok- I agreed to 3 - 10 day visits (my kids are kind of young and a month straight is a long time). He promises that he can take vacation and actually spend that time with them, blah, blah, blah. He only took one week off during that time- (eye roll, like I didn't see that coming). Whatever, that's why I pay for daycare.

Then about a month ago I get ANOTHER summons to reduce child support because with that 30 days in the summer he now hits 91 days for the year... are your freaking kidding me, that is what this was about??? So here is my thing. He needs that 30 days in the summer to get him to that point to drop CS by $250 a month. HOWEVER- he is deploying from March to October next year! So that means no spring break, no weekends for 6 months and no summer. OH and that mean he will be MAKING $700 more a month during the deployment.

What do y'all think will happen? Will the judge tell him to wait until after he is done with the deployment or will he get the reduction based on what he has the potential to get in vistation?

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He only took one week. Have

He only took one week. Have the judge smack him for filing fraudulently. He gets the discount if he takes the time. IE the kids have to actually spend that many overnights with him, not just on paper to get the discount.

Then ask "while we are here' to have a temporary CS modification done due to his forthcoming deployment that during that time he will be missing x amount making his annual overnights fall to (insert #) oh- and dads income increases, so please recalculate and thank you.

Then turn to your ex and smile sweetly

He took them overnight for

He took them overnight for all 3 weeks, he just took them to daycare all day- he didn't take the vacation time as promised- which is why I agreed, thinking they would have quality time with a parent versus daycare.

It was just the fact that he

It was just the fact that he lied about and promised the kids Disney. Instead they just went to his GF's family's place...

So do you think the

So do you think the overnights spent with you where the kids go to daycare the next day don't count as YOUR custody time? If you use the logic that his overnights for 3 weeks dont count as parenting time, then yours doesnt count either.

And who cares where he was taking them? He is their dad. He doesnt have to take them anywhere. Your plans have never changed????

I would agree with you except

I would agree with you except for the "next year hasn't happened". This was very well planned out on his part. He did this with the sole purpose of me not being able to address it before he leaves (you have wait 6 months to file for changes and he will be gone) and once he is back he is back and it wont be an "issue" for another 2 years.

The change in child support

The change in child support would be a 'back pay' for the extra time he had the kids & needed to feed/clothe/pay for daycare.

You can go for a change as soon as his time with the kids is missed & reduced. Also, if he gets an increase in pay that's also a reason to go for a change.

I'm not sure what the judge will do though. Bring evidence of him leaving for next year. They will probably say next year hasn't happened yet, come back next year. But it depends on the judge & the state you're in. Good luck!

1) I spend vacation time with

1) I spend vacation time with my kids when I have vacation time from work. I also don't work 12 hour days have leave them in daycare the whole time when I do work.

2) I don't want his extra money I just don't think it is fair that he doesn't have any visitation for 6 months which leads to more cost for me and he pays LESS. I was married almost 10 years. I get it.

3)They didn't go to their grandma's they went the the new GF's parents.

I think you missed a lot in this post and need to read about the physical abuse, restraining orders and the fact that last month he holed up in his house with the kids and the police had to come and remove them AGAIN.

This whole thing is to get out of supporting his kids. In fact the only reason he started having visitation was because he "has to pay for them anyway". My exH is a world class douche.

I haven't read the other

I haven't read the other blogs so I may be wrong, but I figure your DH works 12 hours a day so he can pay child support and support his household?

If he asked for a reduction so he could have more time with the kids & work less then that wouldn't be right either.

My DH works a lot when SD is here. BM works when SD is there. Parents have to do what they have to do to provide. Both of them have to use child care. It's completely not reasonable to expect them to take 3 weeks off to stay at home with the kids, I think. Where I work I only get 2 weeks vacation time a year (it rolls over & with time we get more) I could never do that.

I'm sure he would much rather have visitation for 6 months than be wherever they are sending him. I think there are federal laws preventing soldiers from having to pay unreasonable amounts of child support when they have to forfeit visitation. There may be programs through the government to help with expenses while he is gone, I'm not sure. That is if you feel like you can't make it on the amount he is going to be paying. I'm not sure what ur situation is.

But I think he must not be a very awesome dad because most dads get like the whole summer if they don't have custody & him fighting to get 3 weeks seems unusual to me. DH gets 8 weeks hands down didn't even have to fight for it.