Even armed with proof, still no consequences
Dh has a rule, no food outside of the kitchen. Of course the youngest four kids follow this rule and if course oldest sd sneaks food into her bedroom because she's used to doing whatever the hell she wants 
A few months ago I pointed out to dh that she had wrappers under her bed and he said "oh those were from a long time ago, she knows better now.
Flash forward to now, cherries are finally in season so they have only been available as a snack in our house the past week or so. Yesterday I noticed there were fruit flies in sds room. There were cherry pis under her bed and an orange peel in her nightstand. Ali dozens of candy wrappers and a few pieces of used chewing gum which she is not supposed to chew since she has braces. Mind you, she has a trash basket right by her bed and she manages to throw paper and tissues in there so why pray tell would this stuff be under her bed and in her nightstand? Is it perhaps because she knows we empty the trash and she would get caught breaking the no food outside the kitchen rule????
In the past, I would confront dh, he would make an excuse and we would fight, so this time I asked to speak with them both at the same time. I pointed out all the wrappings, told them about the fruit flies and asked why she didn't use her trash.
Dh told her to stop breaking the rule... Nothing about the lying of course and then said I don't know what to do with you. No consequences, no changes, just please don't do that again. Just wow
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But ..... that's his
But ..... that's his daughter. Miss Perfect Princess. No one gives a "princess" something like a consequence. She's a perfect BM in training.
This is guilt in action.
This is guilt in action. Quite a few divorced fathers have big guilt when it comes to their children and i suspect even more so with daughters. Princess is right. Dont be surprised if this princess acts like she outranks you in your own home. Even youre technically a 'queen' the 'princess' thinks of you only as the kings concubine and not worthy of her respect. And guilt turns the king into a coward.
You may be right but honestly
You may be right but honestly I don't understand why HE feels guilty. His fat whore ex wife left HIM.
Oh and the turf wars have already started my friend.
Hahaha the sad thing is he
Hahaha the sad thing is he has another daughter who is awesome. This is the first born though and thus is the Christ child
Well I would tell him "So you
Well I would tell him "So you have changed your mind on the 'no food outside the kitchen ..thing? Great, I will let the other kids know." Just smack it back at him that if he allows it for one child the others get the same rules. He can't argue with that can he?
So he will say "Oh no! Everyone except SD has to eat in the kitchen. She is special." Because to do so would be admitting favouritsm. And if he did .... he would be making his own meals and doing his own laundry until he gets an attitude adjustment.
See he won't admit he has
See he won't admit he has different rules for her. He sets the rules, she ignores them, I point it out and he either makes excuses for her or mildly scolds her, doesn't give her a consequence and she just keeps doing the same. Around and around we go!
So if I said "oh so oldest sd has different rules he would just deny it
Make HIM clean SD's room
Make HIM clean SD's room then. He can deal with the rotting food and filth.
I did this to my DH, same exact scenario you had. My DH HATES to clean. And by god, I stood OVER him to make sure he cleaned to MY standards.
You wanna bend the rules for the precious steppies but hold my childrens' feet to the fire? Hell no.
Needless to say, he got fed up (no pun intended) with the state of their filth and came down hard. Probably not so much because they were breaking the rules, but because HE didn't want to clean up after than anymore.
*shrug* whatever works.....