The severity of things is greater than I ever really care to remember or mention, I have posted stuff before but you might be new to the forum. My apology for not giving enough information. SD is a sociopath, has been in and out of custody since she was 13 and we have taken her back three times already, this being the 4th and last. SD is 19 years old and does drugs, hangs with pimps, dances in clubs, does batchelor parties and wants life all on her terms. She disapeared for four hours, an errand that really would only take one hour. DH let SD know that vanishing for hours is not how to get back on track, she wants back on track she says. Then SD comes and asks me if I can give her a ride so she can go to work, I said 'no'. DH told her that it was not possible to get her to and from 'work' at those unsocial hours so it would be after the holidays, after new years, not this side of the year.
SD started bitching about her mail was not where she could readily get it, Complaining etc. and telling me she was going to get a PO box for privacy and to make sure she got her mail. I stayed calm, not getting caught up in her dramatic shit but SD very volatile and things were not going her way, She tells DH that she hopes his chemo kills him?! If it helps you to better understand then I should tell you that the entire juvenile justice system could not deal with this girl effectively, she was kicked out of two group homes because she's going to do what SHE wants and it doesn't matter at who's expense.
This girl has to be gone! DH just told her to call one of her friends, pack up her shit and get the fuck out of our house. We gave her food and shelter and somewhere to lay low from the people who she said were abusing her. The rules were simple, lay low, no one knows you are here, have a break, rest up and then pick back up at university. She got her daddy's intelligence and her momma's personality...poor kid! See, that's the chink in my armor, I felt sorry for her the first twice we took her back but then I learned that sociopaths do not change their ways, they adapt to suit their surroundings to get what they want. The diagnosis of borderline personality disorder was made when SD was 15, the things she did were more than just teenage rebellion. There's no history of abuse towards this girl, if she's chastized she yells abuse! This girl was put on a time out, stand outside the back door (a time out was at the front door once and she ran off, flagged a cop down and told him we'd put her out the house...the cop sat her down and gave her a talking to) Anyhow, this time out didn't suit her and she started kicking the door, so hard that the glass was about to break, and DH went to tell her to stop it. SD grabbed DH and beat on him, then she pulled her own hair out, banged her own head and scratched up her own arms and then called 911 and it was the ONE officer who did not know her and he believed her story and DH was arrested! We went to court on the due date, the DA said 'go home, pick up the minutes in the morning sir.' They all know SD and they know us a whole lot better than we'd like them to, we did 5 hours of evaluations when SD first entered the juvenile justice system, so bad was her behavior, we got IQ, EQ and questionaires and an interview with a psychologist, all of these we did in the best interests of SD, I took exception at first but it was court ordered so I complied. Five hours of evaluations is a LOT to deal with, DH and I were exhausted by the end of it all. SD just bounces back to her ways, as easily as you or I would shrug a jacket off and on. There was counselling available, family counselling too. We had some family counselling and SD threw a fork at me (wide but her intention was to provoke drama) and the counsellor wanted me to press charges, this was just the first go round and I said 'no'. Silly me!
Her clothes were to be washed the day after Christmas, she stopped her brother using the machines because she'd asked first and then she did not do her laundry. SD was told to get her stuff and get out, this was a delay tactic on her part and an attempt to aggravate before she left. I said 'no' because I knew there was not enough time between that point in time and her ride arriving. She ended up taking soaking wet clothes with her...what can I say?
I'll be glad when she's in jail (doing the three months because I know she will not pay the $400 restitution and there is a warrant out for her) so I can know exactly where she is. SD was in a secure juvenile facility, sentenced to two years for felony assault on the elderly and a cop. She was offered drug court, in leu of jail time but failed that and had to serve out her sentence.
There are whole catalogues of events that I could describe to you but I think you might get the picture now.

You've seen the light, it is blinding huh?