Quick recap: we have 50/50 custody of twin SS/SD5. BM wants to relocate out of state to a location just over 3 hours from us. Her proposed custody change is something like 70/30 or 75/25 depending on holiday factors and she wants CS to boot, of course. The "benefits" of the move is that she would have her student debt eliminated but would see no income increase. If she would stay at that employer for the next 16 years, the kids would be eligible for free tuition at the university system she would be working for. (Kids won't graduate for over a decade and she would have to stay employed there throughout their collegiate careers to continue receiving those benefits.)

She just gave birth Sunday to her fourth. There have been complications and she's been in and out of the hospital all week. She wants to move in less than a month. There's been no offers on her $400K house and there's no way she'll get a loan for the next house without selling the one she's in. Her new husband works here but would be unemployed in the next place she wants to move.

BM has been very grateful to my partner and I for picking up her slack with the kids because of her newborn and medical complications. Hell, she's supposed to have them right now but she's back in the hospital. She's super-thankful that I'm at home full time to take care of them but she's still going to push for a move where we wouldn't see or care for them very much, at all. She's already told us that if the court doesn't rule in her favor that she won't move and we would keep our custody arrangements the way they are now.

We finally got a hold of the lawyer and we'll be seeing her for planning a few hours before the hearing. Even I have to testify this time.

I'm really stressed out. I've been taking care of the kids solo for most of the break and, though they've been relatively well behaved, they're a handful. On top of that, I'm so nervous that every time I think about what's about to happen and what could happen, my stomach churns. I can't seem to think about anything else... Some way to start the New Year. We'll be in court for 5 hours on the 30th and by the 31st, we'll either be celebrating or sobbing.