Something I read.

I read this tonight and to me it conveys the sadness of steplife, when you've tried everything you could try, done everything you could possibly do and have come to the realization that it's taken so much out of you that you just don't care anymore.

"My silence means I am tired of fighting and now there is nothing left to fight for. My silence means I am tired of explaining my feelings to you, but now I don't have the energy to explain them anymore. My silence means I have adapted to the changes in my life and I don't want to complain. My silence means I am on a self healing process and I am trying to forget everything I ever wanted from you. My silence means I am just trying to move on gracefully
with all my dignity." - Aarti Khurana

Does this hit home for any of you?

Dollbabies's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

It sure does. I am exhausted

It sure does. I am exhausted with it all .

This is how I used to feel.

Pissed off the Disneyland dad constantly accusing me of "not being involved enough" with his disrespectful loud messy codependent spawns.

Arguing with him about this because he refused to see how his lack of boundaries n structure, enabling their c*nt mother to drop them off anytime off schedule last minute, having them over just to cater to them while they contributed nothing (laid on their duffs all day like broke roommates, refused to clean after themselves, roamed my kitchen all night inhaling food like rabid raccoons, etc) wasn't single-handedly destroying out relationship (as I no longer had any physical attraction to him anymore)

I got tired of the ptsd I experienced when his ferals randomly plowed through the front door and relieved after they left

I got tired of him arguing with me every weekend or more.

I got tired of his willfully obtuse behavior.

Once I reached my breaking point I was DONE being his b*tch beck n call sidekick exisisting just to help him coddle his manipulative ex wife and codependent kids

He was very stupid to think I was about to sit here and waste my already - stretched thin resources on a man who was not ready for a new relationship because he clearly overly prioritized his ex wife and her kids. Not about to play into some sick sister wives fetish where I'm treated like the mistress/5th wife to his ex-spouse and mini-spouse.

Nope!!! He had me effed up!!!

I would intentionally "disappear" during his random custody "schedule" because if Disneyland dad tried to use me as a live in maid - then I refused to use any other resources (expending energy entertaining them, spending money on them, helping him in any other capacity with them, etc)

I disengaged right on out of the house living with him, those ferals, and their c*nt mother by proxy (who conveniently for her selfish interests lived 5 minutes away)

You are your own person

You tried, they didn't want the help. You did your part. It's the birth parent who first relationship failed, like they didn't gave a part in it. Gets involved in a second relationship, thinking they know best. Because they failed already. Just gets on line to fail again. Not many divorce people go for help to find out why they failed. They just do it again. Think they are getting different results.

SP just disengage from the SK, You just stop wasting your time and money, effort for no good reason. Weather you stay in your relationship that up to you. At a certain age the chance to find someone good gets less . Just a bunch of fail relationships people out there,

Definitely hits home

Husband and I are in our "just friends" phase.

I think

this can apply to marriages in general, although stepfamilies certainly complicate everything. I spent long years of my life trying to get my ex-husband to stop being such a jerk and enjoy the family we had. Eventually - and I remember the exact moment - I realized he couldn't hurt me anymore because I just didn't care. I didn't want a divorce because we had minor children and I didn't have kids to only be with them part of the time. So I disengaged from him, did my own thing and was relatively happy. When he threw his temper tantrums he did so without an audience, without getting any reaction from me.

He walked out a couple years later and while it was initially mind-blowingly unexpected my life became SO much better.

Hey, Dollbabies,

I've always wondered how the settling of your DH's estate ended up after his untimely death. As I recall, your awful steps were horribly neglectful of their father yet shed crocodile tears at his funeral. At that time, you feared that the steps would create issues over your DH's will; standard operating procedure for those types of 'bottomfeeders'.

They are doing

whatever they can to make my life miserable, which really isn't that hard these days. I have them blocked on social media and have had to do this with other of my husband's family just to not hear what they're saying. It infuriates me and I just can't deal with that right now.

As far as the estate goes, we unwittingly did the absolutely best thing we could do to make it impenetrable. Shocked the hell out of me! They still have time to file but I have heard nothing yet.

Thank you so much for asking - this is a very lonely time in my life.

Aw, Hon! I can well imagine

Aw, Hon! I can well imagine the suffering and grief that you must be undergoing right now. My DH is the great love of my life and the only fly in the ointment of my happiness is the reality that he'll probably predecease me; I come from a long-lived family on both sides (90s) whereas his genetics are poor. His father suffered a fatal heart attack at 75 and DH has already undergone a triple bypass.

You must be so lonely and sad, poor you! I sure wish that the internet ((((HUGS)))) I’m sending could be delivered in person! Time is the only remedy for sorrow, more’s the pity. ♥️

Thank you

for the kind words. It is a difficult thing to deal with - I hope your DH is around for a long time.

You are here

Comments