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I don’t remember

Newimprvmodel's picture

Submitted by Newimprvmodel on Sat, 01/27/2024 - 11:44am

Forums: 
Adult Stepchildren

So the other day DH out of the blue comes out and says that he was talking to one of his kids via cell of course and SHE asks him if "Mary dislikes me or is unhappy with me?"  I told him that I hoped he denied it of course. He said he did and added that he said "but Mary and I want you to visit and for you to come for a holiday". So he says that he talked to her about coming for a  weekend weekend in the spring. Turns out my birthday is on that Saturday?!  I said that I'm sure she would feel very uncomfortable being at my house for my birthday. She has never acknowledged it ever. I've also asked him something must have prompted her to ask him that. I've had absolutely no contact with her since the summer. He of course says he has no memory of it. Yeah right. 
So now I'm afraid my birthday will get hijacked. Look at my age I truly want to forget getting a year older but I usually like to do something with DH as he is always working or playing golf. So now he says I need to suck it up and enjoy her coming.  Although I gotta say she won't. She agreed because she was put on the spot by him. When I asked him why he doesn't drive the few hours to visit her I was met with silence. 

CajunMom's picture

Submitted by CajunMom on Sat, 01/27/2024 - 12:33pm

at this point in my life with DHs kids. Like you, none of them have EVER acknowledged my birthday in almost 20 years. It's MY birthday....I celebrate the way I want and with who I want. I actually enjoy celebrating my day. I would NOT let her mess up your special day. Your DH needs to find his you know whats and tell his daughter that the date will not work. It slipped his mind but it's your birthday and plans have been made.

In other words, YOU suck it up, DH. 

MorningMia's picture

Submitted by MorningMia on Sat, 01/27/2024 - 9:20pm

You make the command decision. Oh no. Absolutely not. DH needs to walk that back. 

(I'm also in the "birthday never once acknowledged" club. I finally stopped buying skid gifts and even signing cards myself.) 

AgedOut's picture

Submitted by AgedOut on Sat, 01/27/2024 - 2:36pm

have fun at home w/ your offspring, I'v got a birthday to celebrate with my family and friends! 

BobbyDazzler's picture

Submitted by BobbyDazzler on Sun, 01/28/2024 - 10:39am

Have DH call her to arrange for another date. It's your birthday. Why should it be brought down by the daughter that doesn't acknowledge it anyway. If DH won't call, you can. If I wait for my DH to set boundaries with OSS, there'd be none. Good luck.

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Sun, 01/28/2024 - 11:53am

You celebrate it the way you want to. DH had no right to do what he did. With out asking first.  It's up to him to fix this and cancel her coming.   What is SD going to do .....not come over.    She is doing that now.. let DH  unrealistic idea of a happy family blow up