I'm pretty sure I can't stand my overly spoiled step kids. I used to like them but good Lord have my eyes been opened.  I have two step daughters one is 32 and the other 28.5.  My husband and I married in 2020 after 6 years of dating. 2 months in his then 25 year old had a melt down like I've never witnessed before! Claimed she wanted to hurt herself so we brought her into our home to stay for 17 days. She walked around pouting the entire time. DH finally told her she had to go back home. And by home I mean his old house he kept for her to live in "while going to school". Her wonderful mom wouldn't let her move in with her. DH paid the mortgage, all the house hold bills, helped with groceries AND she convinced him he needed to pay her $1000 a month allowance. This wasn't all disclosed to me upfront. I found out a few months in and explained to him he was enabling her and no wonder she hadn't done anything in life and was depressed. She had gone and bought a truck with a $850 a month payment!! She made like $13.50 an hour at her job but her worthless mother co-signed when dad said he didn't support her buying it. But then his allowance basically covered the payment and gas. When I learned of the allowance I had him talk to a counselor to explain the harm of enabling. Counselor suggested reducing the allowance in steps over the next couple months until it was gone. My husband has a heart of gold and just wants to take care of his girls. His ex is a horrible narcissist who basically abandoned the girls when they were little to do what she wanted and was the one who cheated on DH. Well when he cut the allowance the first time down to $750 SD lost her mind and went running to mommy dearest who came out with her claws. Called me a horrible step mom trying to cut SD out of his life and put her on the street. SD didn't speak to me for a year. We continued to give her a home all bills paid for 2.5 years and an allowance. DH had already told her she would have to move by this past April because we were going to sell the house. She had a years notice but when we showed up in November of 22 to start working on getting it cleaned up and ready. She was filthy! Well that caused another meltdown and calls to mom and big sis. Mom once again came accusing us of kicking her out. He finally said she needed to just go live with mom so she did. Of course mom wanted him to help financially had the balls to say we had 3 incomes and she was just one. Three being DHs retirement, his post retirement job (which had ALL been going to her the past 2.5 years) and then mine. Now I had a 17 year old son I was responsible for but this screaming banshee felt I needed to give her money for her 27 year old! BTW she has never said these things to me only to my husband because she feels she can manipulate him. Older daughter scolded dad and said she didn't agree but would stay out of it. So much drama and bs. Then Christmas rolls around a few weeks later and it was just awful. I barely spoke, felt awkward in my own home. Girls left and I haven't seen the older once since. She lives 3 hours away but will come thru on business and go have lunch with her dad. Her birthday was this past summer and she asked him to come down and visit her but come alone. Says she has nothing against me but that was rude and to put him in the situation where he has to tell me I'm not invited. The crazy SD I've only seen once since then when she graduated from paramedic school back in May. She still lives with mommy who just posted on social media a pic of flowers, a photo and a card that crazy had left on the counter for her "thanking her for all she's done for her" and even mentioned how she "took her and her dog in". *puke* I know we spent over $145,000 on this person in 2.5 years and she's never once said thank you to her dad. Only drama. We have learned in the past year that she's BPD but that doesn't excuse all of this in my mind. I have told my husband the girls are rude and I won't celebrate Christmas with them this year. I feel bad and guilty but their so freaking spoiled and ungrateful. Why should I buy gifts and cook and wait on people who try and avoid me the rest of the year?