Please fill the details but in short we ALL feel left out and less than because that's how they treat us. What we learn is to place our energy and focus elsewhere. My SKIDs are butthurt right now because they complained to daddeee that stepmom isn't giving enough focus on these adult children and their kids - my response: Years of being left out and treated like the villian when I have continued to be nice has left me with no choice. Tell them to be respectful to me and to reach out in some sort of positive way then we can begin the journey to healing. DH sends this message and what do they do? Nothing. That's my answer. More info and we can give better direction.
I have felt like an outcast at times with DH's large family. He is only child remarried out of 7. We don't share cousins together and it makes a difference. I just walked into our computer room that is mostly DH's office and on the desk was a ridiculously large blow up photo of DH with his two young nephews who visit with their father a couple times every year. I plan all the outings. Cook and bake. And every year DH only gets enlarged photos of himself with the boys. And each year they get bigger. Lol. Ugh really. So I feel frustrated. I try. Do I just sit back for their next visit and not lift a finger? That's not who I am. But honestly does my brother in law assume we are going to have a wall devoted to his kids? He's a nice guy and fixes many things when he is here. But I feel like I don't matter.
You indeed are left out. You come after the kids and most of ghe time the EX. These people will never change. Some intact family's the adults put the kids first. Sun rises and falls upon there kids. That's OK when both adults agrees to that. SFanilys are different..SP life doesn't revolve around someone else kids. Tine to have that talk with your SO. Time for him to change or time for you to exit. If he can't change now. It will never get better
I got a note from @invisible_stepmum - she did try to post the details but somehow the message she typed got lost and didn't post. This happens and when you are ready please try again! We are here to support.
Want to tell us more about
Want to tell us more about you, about your situation?
Please fill the details but
Please fill the details but in short we ALL feel left out and less than because that's how they treat us. What we learn is to place our energy and focus elsewhere. My SKIDs are butthurt right now because they complained to daddeee that stepmom isn't giving enough focus on these adult children and their kids - my response: Years of being left out and treated like the villian when I have continued to be nice has left me with no choice. Tell them to be respectful to me and to reach out in some sort of positive way then we can begin the journey to healing. DH sends this message and what do they do? Nothing. That's my answer. More info and we can give better direction.
If you're feeling as
If you're feeling as invisible as your post, hon, you definitely have a problem. Kidding aside, please tell us more; we're here to help.
Second wife syndrome.
I have felt like an outcast at times with DH's large family. He is only child remarried out of 7. We don't share cousins together and it makes a difference.
I just walked into our computer room that is mostly DH's office and on the desk was a ridiculously large blow up photo of DH with his two young nephews who visit with their father a couple times every year. I plan all the outings. Cook and bake. And every year DH only gets enlarged photos of himself with the boys. And each year they get bigger. Lol. Ugh really.
So I feel frustrated. I try. Do I just sit back for their next visit and not lift a finger? That's not who I am. But honestly does my brother in law assume we are going to have a wall devoted to his kids? He's a nice guy and fixes many things when he is here. But I feel like I don't matter.
Have you talked to your DH
Have you talked to your DH about this? If so, what does he say? He needs to look out for you! I hate this!
‘When you feel left out
You indeed are left out. You come after the kids and most of ghe time the EX. These people will never change. Some intact family's the adults put the kids first. Sun rises and falls upon there kids. That's OK when both adults agrees to that. SFanilys are different..SP life doesn't revolve around someone else kids.
Tine to have that talk with your SO. Time for him to change or time for you to exit. If he can't change now. It will never get better
Take care of yourself.
Take care of yourself.
There is a ton of empathy and support here. Do tell, and let us know how we can help.
I got a note from @invisible
I got a note from @invisible_stepmum - she did try to post the details but somehow the message she typed got lost and didn't post. This happens and when you are ready please try again! We are here to support.