Countdown (Cont. Pt 3) … Shaking the table
*possible trigger warning
Trying not to shake it too much ... don't want to live in a war zone next several days but I did want to get out of "sexual obligations" / "bonding"
I ain't a wife and until I am (heck even if/when I am) I'm still not letting any man pressure me into "duties"/not in the mood sex especially when they act undesirable
So I told him that I had IBS but that wasn't enough of a turn off plus without a diagnosis he wouldn't believe it
Then I told him I had a medical condition that causes low libido (which I believe could be a possibility but another possibility is that I'm just not that sexually attracted to him anymore) and needed to get it checked out first before I did anything remotely sexual. I was willing to "throw myself under the bus" to avoid giving him false hopes by continuing to service him like that.
He of course acted completely insensitive.
I accused him of being an insensitive hypocritical a$$hole (expecting me to accept/be patient/understanding when he was seeking treatment for infertility... which his docs discovered was caused by low testosterone), overdosing on his testosterone to the point he had an unreasonable sex drive and demanding that he seek medical (and psychological) treatment
I suppose I kind of need this to remind myself how oversexed he is (he refuses to acknowledge that taking more than the recommended dose of testosterone is unnecessarily increasing his libido) and how his entire existence is hinged upon whether he's getting f*cked or not.
Making my blood boil knowing he expects grace and understanding of his medical conditions (that affect sex/reproductive hormones) but when the shoe is on the other foot he has zero consideration.
I don't care as much since I know this move will clear the path for me to have the space and the clarity in attracting better things in my life.
I guess I needed to bubble up some of the core issues because if i am too nice then he will expect sex bit if I'm too mean he might make it a toxic environment until I leave/try to force me out sooner than I'm prepared to do so.
I hope to be indifferent with him until I leave.
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... then had the audacity to
... then had the audacity to request I just do it to please him
Tell that insensitive asshat
Tell that insensitive asshat that the obgyn doc is concerned you might have a cyst on one of your ovaries, which is bending your uterus into an 'L' shape. Point to a nonexistent bulge on your lower abdomen where "this could be the cyst pushing outward". (It is horribly painful and intercourse is out of question.)
TBH, at this point, I'd agree to fellatio... then gag as if I was going to vomit. Frankly, I think I actually would. He'd be sure to luuuuuuuvvvv that. Insensitive jerk. When I had that cyst bending my uterus in an L, I was barfy 100% of the time.
at this point, I'd agree to
So, when is the day you are
So, when is the day you are finally moving into your new approved apartment?
Just a little under 2 weeks
Just a little under 2 weeks till I can reclaim my life, my bed, my peace, and my freedom.
I already have the place and the movers lined up.
i would have gotten out sooner and moved to a hotel or something but I have strict rules on where I can take my work devices plus I think I would be more overwhelmed trying to do two moves right now (I just got a promotion at work in a new role I feel kind of incompetent/ trying to do my best to learn plus I have a lot to do as far as untangling things/packing and my side business is attached to his account so I need time to set up my business on my own account)
I do think I may be pressing a button for him by refusing sex since his self worth is so tied up in how frequent he's getting effed.
He owes me about $170 so I may let him keep it ... do like Charlie Sheen did when asked why he paid for escorts - and he replied that he paid them to LEAVE him alone after the act was done.
If I need to slide him some chump change to just be a roommate and leave me tf alone these next 2 weeks and either meet his needs himself or with someone else then I guess it is what it is.
Let him take matters into his
Let him take matters into his own hands. Or hand...
Let him take matters into his
EXACTLY... like bruh go use some lotion and the JC Penny intimates catalog and leave me tf alone lol!
I have no problem taking matter in my own hands ... he should too heck if I relied on 97% of these men to please me I'd be a raging neurotic lunatic (even more than I am now hahaha)
Bravo, Lily. You'll feel so
Bravo, Lily. You'll feel so much better. I hope you will stay here and keep us posted because I have a feeling that your soon to be ex will not let you live in peace once you're gone.
Many of us have left partners who would not leave us alone after we were gone, and we can perhaps help.
That means so much that y'all
That means so much that y'all will still be willing to provide insight and support after this.
the more he's got his kids
the more he's got his kids around him, the less time you have to spend fending off his advances.
As soon as he realizes she is gone, his kids will consume
his life and every second possible.
When they are not with him, he will wallow in his relationship idiocy.... if he does not immediately jump back in the sack with his X.
Maybe anyway.
As soon as he realizes she is
I'd love to be a fly on the wall watching his over coddled demanding kids and his manipulative ex drive him into the depths of trauma bonded single parent struggle (his ex wife is lazy af so even though those kids have two parents neither one of them can hack it as single parents)
But you know what more power to them hopefully they improve themselves for the sake of those kids and those kids somehow learn to be productive members of society
Barf!!! But LOL if he did. He just might be desperate enough to go back to her. I can't imagine any woman in her right mind wanting to be 7th place behind these dysfunctional domestic t3rrorists
YESSSS.... good point.
YESSSS.... good point.
Im going to invite them over more these last few days lol ...
Hey Lillie,
Hey Lillie,
Your post triggered some ugly, old memories that were best left to molder in the crypt of ancient times. Sex with my pathologically oversexed first husband (the psychopath) was an abomination worse than a root canal. I hated the jerk so much and was so disgusted with his twice-daily (yup, you read that right!) advances that it took all of my self-control to keep from pushing him off during the deed!
In my opinion, there are few feminine aversions more intense than unwanted sex; particularly when the advance comes from a man who does not appeal. One of the best things about my 4 years of single life was the ability to choose my lovers and refuse all unwanted sex. So freeing!
You’re getting close, Hon; hang in there!
One of the best things about
EXACTLY
He tried to gaslight me and say I "never" desire sex.
Im like look here mf...."maybe if you acted in a more attractive manner I would and I thoroughly enjoyed my sexuality when I was single and I had the choice to engage in intimate encounters, on my time, when I was in the mood not on some weekly quota bullsh*t
And twice daily quota?!? ... glad you left him.
ROFL!
Good one, Lilly!
Actually, just because demanded sex twice a day did not mean he GOT it twice a day! Once a week was the limit of my endurance. Thanks for the laugh.
GD and Lilly, I am so angry for you both.
While my XW was about as close to non engaged sexually in our marriage as is possible, I never once pressured her for sex. Though I definately put her in a position to say no night, after night, after night and I slept on the sofa ... to make a point. It turned out that her libido was being serviced in volume by any number of willing lovers she was racking up by the dozens while we were married. She left her diaries when she moved out. It was all in there in gory detail by date and location of activities.
I am sorry you have had these characterless pathogical men in your lives.
Take care of you. I am glad that you are long past these men, or soon will be.
I’m curious why you don’t
I’m curious why you don’t just tell him no? If you did are you worried he would force himself on you…well then that’s rape. Or will he get angry and get physically violent…because then that’s assault. If you are worried that these are two options then waiting 2 more weeks really is not the best option for you, you need to leave immediately. If you just don’t want him to pout and be upset with you, well I mean you are leaving in two weeks, who cares.
If you just don’t want him to
Exactly....like you mean to tell me your ego is so fragile that you're that desperate for seggs?!? I told him he needed to talk to his doctor about the fact he is overdosing on his testosterone which is making him even more oversexed than he already is. Not my fault his self esteem hinges on whether he can get sex or not. He needs a therapist and a lobotomy.
If he is wise he won't do that bc I will tase tf out of him AND call the police in front of his kids. I already told him off the top I will have him arrested if he dare! He might not be scared of me but he will be scared of his kids seeing him get toted off to one of the worst jails in the nation / being poked in the slammer / having layaway plan pr0stitut3 using her cs for bail
This is O/T but ...
Does his doctor know that he's overdosing on his testosterone and does he understand the risks of doing so?
He claims his doctor told him
He claims his doctor told him it was okay to take extra
But he fails to understand (or purposely pretends not to understand) that testosterone impacts libido and the extra dosage is also unnecessarily boosting his libido