SD says Child Protection Services are Stupid....
Not that I completely disagree, they take away children for NO reason and for STUPID reasons... And sometimes don't step in when OBVIOUSLY necessary... so yes, I agree Child Protection Services are "stupid"
BUT her reasoning is this:
Let me provide a LITTLE back story first:
BM took in a friend whose OWN MOTHER wouldn't take her and the 4-5yo child in, DH used to hang out with this person when he was with BM, he says that she's BIG TIME night life, goes out drinking and "partying" (doing drugs) all the time. The father of this child is SUPPOSEDLY a comeplete dead beat dad (according to BM and her friend)
SO dad apparently accused BM's husband of touching the child. is ALWAYS complaining that the child comes filthy, with her hair matted to her head and spots where you can see her hair has been pulled out... He's called child protective services on the mother and BM's husband MULTIPLE times... SD thinks that itis "stupid" for ALWAYS coming and investigating, searching the house, and questioning everyone
I reassure her that I understand that it's frustrating, but it's actually a GOOD thing that they are taking EVERY report seriously. If the shoe was on the other foot, and the child's mother had suspicions that the child was being molested or neglected and CPS DIDN'T come out, you would be furious! Could you imagine if something WAS happening and they DIDN'T come? How are they supposed to know that NOTHING is actually happening until they DO come.
this 17 couldn't see it even when I turned it around and explained to her the importance of them coming, because her MOMMY said they are stupid, so in her eyes, they are stupid....
It FRIGHTENS me that in 1 year she'll be an adult... but STILL relies on her mother to form her opinions, and can't think critically and form her own opinoins.
If her mum is a narc and very high conflict,
She wouldn't be independent enough to form her own opinions. Everything is bio mum this etc.
same here for eldest sd who was 23, its like a broken record player that my husband told off to stop mentioning her mum, he never wanted to hear about her again.
Me and hubby called this "noise pollution" lol. So far it stopped.
They are both narcissists
They are both narcissists (not diagnosed, but they check EVERY box). The amount of gaslighting they both do is insane. Any time either of them don't get their way, they like to say that that person is detrimental to their mental health. DH has heard that line so many times he's beginning to believe it. He's scared to discipline sd, and he's getting to where he's afraid to call her out for her lies. He doesn't make her apologize for her behavior... luckily she's hardly here. She has been acting "nice" but i think she's wanting something ....
CPS is needed, but…
CPS is needed. There are cases where removal is absolutely necessary. But, there are cases where CPS does not act in the child's best interest. A middle class family is often treated differently than a family living near the poverty line.
https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/takeaway/segments/does-us-child-wel...