Things have been good here. SO had a great session with the counselor. He still has a long ways to go to get out of BMs toxic cycle, but he is learning how to build better walls from the counselor and get over his feelings of guilt.

I'm starting to think BMs real motivation for keeping YSD is to have someone to take her frustrations out on. I realize that I have reached a point where I have seperated myself from the crazy because I am not effected by this.

The way I look at it at this point is YSD made her bed. She gave up everything she had here to live a life where she doesn't ever get to go anywhere or do anything. No longer even has her phone. All so she doesn't have to be called out on her behavior and can live in filth, eat all day and never have to clean up after herself.

A few nights ago YSD started texting SO and I at 11pm which means she waited until BM went to bed. Well BM must have found out because the next day according to the app BM took her phone and has had it ever since.

Which says a lot because YSDs explaination to her workers for refusing to have anything to do with SO is she wants the app removed from her phone. Yet it's perfectly ok for BM to confiscate it? 

I am waiting for BM to have a complete breakdown soon. She has a court date with exBF for custody and he is using both SDs mental health issues and the current CPS and mental health services involvement as an argument for maintaining custody of the 4 year old. 

So for a woman who never wanted to parent only make SOs life miserable. Right now for whatever crazy reason BM is living in a place she can't afford. She has both SDs who have severe behavioral problems 24/7, fight all the time, don't listen and are basically feral.  She has to deal with CPS because of it as well as service providers in and out of her home all the time. She has to take time off from work to make sure SDs go to their counseling appointments or risk getting in more trouble with CPS.

She is going to complete lose it when she realizes doing all of the above will likely jeopardize any chances she has of getting custody of the little one because now all SDs issues are well documented by professionals and exBF plans on using that against her to gain custody.