As I said before my DS is on the autism spectrum.  He has his quirks and it takes him a bit longer to reach milestones, etc.  He is now 21 will graduate from college in 6 months with a degree in economics and a minor in history.   **Proud momma here**  The kids has also developed a wicked sense of humor.  

When DS was young he had quirks, such as hand flapping to sooth himself, took things very literally, hated hated schedule change.  With all that DH and I took things very slowly introducing our kids.  We started out with meeting in the park for a little, having dinner together at restaurant, having dinner at one of our homes, etc.   It took us almost three years before DH moved into my house, etc. DH and I wanted to be sure this was serious and not put the kids through more than they needed to.  I wanted to be sure DH could deal with my BS as he required some accomodations and I had to take the kid to alot of therapy appointments, etc.  It was very stressfull for me at times, let alone a person who is not my BS's biological parent.

So..Valentines Day rolls around about a year after DH and I started dating.  Kids are all with their other parent and DH and I are out of town.  We were in the Windy City (I grew up there).  DH and Beaver are in the midst of their first custody battle royal.

Picture this if you will..

Halo..all dressed up in dress, heels, etc.

Dh:  dressed in a suit and tie

We are waiting for our table for a restaurant at the top of a  huge building.  Its a lovely romantic setting. 

DH's phone rings...its beaver. 

Dh:  not answering she can leave a message.  Unless those kids are bleeding and in the damn hospital I'm not answering.

Halo:  Ok...

phone rings again....again and again and again.

Dh:  No message must not be important.  Turns his phone to vibrate.

The text messages then start to flood in.

CALL ME IMMEDIATELY.

CALL ME

WHERE ARE YOU

CALL ME

DH responds.

Kids in Hospital??? Yes or NO

Beaver:  No..they are fine..CALL ME

DH:  I will call you tomorrow I am not available right now.

Beaver:  CALL ME NOW.

Dh proceeded to ignore her for the rest of the evening.  (he knew who was going to butter his bread).  **wink*

There were 60 text messages from Beaver...call me, call me now, why aren't you caling me....

Next Day he calls Beaver.

OH the screaching could be heard around the Windy City...

Now Beaver has a very shall we say interesting way of talking.  She draws the syllables out.   Not like a southern accent..she just draws out the words.  Honestly I always have an urge to hit her in the back of the head and say..SPIT IT OUT ALREADY.

The conversation went like this.

Beaver:  DHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...you should have CALLLLLLLLLLEEDDD MEEEEEEEE immmmediately.   It's about SSSSSSSSSSSS. 

Dh:  ok what.  What was so freaking important you had to call my phone 30 times and send 60 text messages but couldn't tell me in a voice mail or text message.

Beaver:  Are you with YOUR WHOOOORRRRRREE..is that why you wouldn't CALLLL MMMMEEEEEE BACCCCK?  Your whoooorrreee's kid is beating up SSSSSSSSSSS.  SSSSSSS says that BSSSSSSSSS hit him and held him down.

DH:  Really now.  Well I highly doubt that since.  1.  They are not alone together.  2.  SS outweighs BS even though BS is older.  (MY BS was a rail. SS was NOT) 3.  BS is not violent and doesn't like to be touched to begin with.

Beaver:  Welllll...SSSSSSSS doesn't lieeeeeeee.  He would NEVVVVVERRRR lie about something like thisssssss.

DH:  I will address it with SS when I see him on Friday.

Beaver:  BUUUUTTTT DHHHHH..I know BSSSSSSSSS is autstiiiiiiiic. They don't have any empathyyyyyyyy and he will hurt SSSSSSS.  I don't WAANNNNNNNTTT BSSSS around SSSSSS.  SSSSS has BRUISESSSSSSS. You don't carrrreeeeeeee.

DH:  Not your call. I will address it with SS when I see him..

and DH hung up the phone.

Beaver continued to try and call/text and DH just ignored her.

DH gets SS that Friday and asks him about the bruises.  

SS:  I have bruises.  See????  Shows him a bruise on his arm about the size of a dime.

DH:  and where did you get that?

SS:..uhmmm...uhhhh...BS?

DH:  really....you sure about that?  I will ask BS and we will see what he says. (To be noted BS at this point could not lie.  He was so literal he would answer very factually.)

SS:....well maybe not BS,...uhmm....uh...uhhhmm.. ( We would come to know that SS stammering around meant he was lying and trying to figure out his story)

DH:  and?????

SS:  Well it could have been when I was wrestling with Uncle A at Mommy's house  But Mommy told me it was from BS.  That BS held me down and hit me.

DH:  so BS never held you down or hit you did he?

SS: No...starts looking at shoes to see if they will help him out.....but Mommy said.

DH calls beaver on the phone and puts it on speaker.  

DH:  I have talked to SS...and it appears that the bruises are from your brother wrestling with SS.  As I told you..it was not BS

Beaver:  IT hassss to be BSSSSSS.  THOOSSE people have no empathy and they HURRRTTT people without knowing.  I don't want SSSSSSSSSSS around him.  I told SSSSSS it has to be BSSSSS.  He has BRUISSESSSS

DH:  Still not your call.  Try telling your brother to not wrestle with SS.  SS has one bruise on his arm.  NOT multiple bruises.  Stop telling SS that it is BS, just because that is what you want it to be to cause trouble.

And DH hung up her....mid sentence...DHHHHH...YOUOOOOO DOOOOON'T CARRREEE.......

I was fuming at this point...WHO TF uses an 8 year old aspergers as a weapon against their ex.  Beaver that is who...this clued me into exactly what lengths Beaver would go to.   DH also was just flabbergasted she would try something like this.  In his words..I knew she was classless but to use another child, one with a disability at that is despicable.  Not too mention she had SS lie.

This was also the point at which....I told DH..no more phone calls/text messages all communication in writing.  Dh's attorney agreed after hearing about the above interraction.  

That didn't get better....she still uses SS and SS no longer speaks to DH or sees DH.