I'm so miserable with SD here
I am so miserable with SD here. I've been in such a bad mood that she is back here. DH had a convo with her on Monday to see what is going on with her and BM and why she needed to come back here. Obviously as I already suspected they are just bickering like two teenage girls- OH WELL- TOO BAD- I don't care!!!! She's not in danger over there or being abused- just two caddy bi#$@'s that can't get along for a week. She needs to go the F back over there. I'm sick of SD and BM's games and we always pay the price. This has been YEARS of drama and I'm so sick of it. Especially when we have to hear how wonderful BM is and how their bestest buddies. Both of them make me want to puke.
DH and I have both been working for home for 3 weeks. Yesterday he asks SD17 if she will go drop an envelope off at the PO BOX right down the road. She's supposedly bored and has nothing to do so this would get her out for 10 minutes. She gives him an attitude and says "Why, what are you doing?". Long short- they get into a yelling match and I just want to explode and tell that bratty little $hit to shut her mouth. Instead- back upstairs to hide and work from my room. I'm much happier up here. DH ignores her the rest of the day but never really solves the problem. If I had been in his shoes by the time I was done giving her a peace of my mind she would've been running back to her Mother's.
So just now this girl comes upstairs (her bedroom and bathroom are downstairs).. goes into our bathroom and shuts the door. I can hear my closet opening and closing and drawers opening. Clearly she's looking for something... but do you not know how to ask??? I should've just said something- I know it. But I just can't stand her so much I opt out of any contact when I can. I should say something to DH?? But then of course she'll know it came from me.
I need this girl to leave. DH suggested to her we go back to an every other week scheduled until June. She turns 18 and graduates. God knows I'll probably be stuck here with her all Summer. I'm just SO close to peace and alone time with my husband but still feels so far away.
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Yeah, my big mouth would not
Yeah, my big mouth would not have been able to stay closed. Not during the attitude and yelling match, and definitely not while she rummaged through my closet and drawers.
So a lot of people blur the
So a lot of people blur the lines between what is acceptable behavior or not from a stepkid. It's weird to me that a stepparent will get treated in ways that any other human would not be treated. This is in your case. Would you let any of your friends or aquaintances go upstairs into your bathroom and just browse through your clothes and things? No. God I hope not! You confront them and ask them what theyre doing in your things? You should have done, not run to your DH now that the situation has passed. You know it is unacceptable and from the sound of the girl, she does to and is just looking for someone to start fights with and since your DH is ignoring her.
I get keeping the peace in your house but boundaries are always a must and YOUR BEDROOM, BATHROOM, CLOSET, THINGS are all up to you to enforce boundaries around. She should not even cross your threshold.
I agree with you all. Sadly,
I agree with you all. Sadly, I've been this way my whole life! I struggle with confronting people or speaking up for myself. I could've simply just asked her what it was she was looking for and suggest she ask next time and I'd be happy to assist. But I'm a total coward with all that and I know things would've been better from day 1 if I spoke up as to how I was feeling or if I disagreed with something going on. I lived in fear of any of my skids not liking me which was stupid. Now too much time has passed and my relationship with SD is so non-existent that I avoid having to speak to her at all costs. Definitely not the way I envisioned things but at this point I guess I'm just biding my time??!
Hang on in there
Your post made me laugh. Not because I'm a sadist but because one of my SSs goes back and forth between us (me and DH) and his BM. He's currently living with us and I'm like whyyyyyyyy? He's so fricking weird and annoying and I just want to say - go the f**k back home! His horrible BM must be doing a victory dance right now! Gin in my new best friend!