Had enough of step children
I have been a step mom for 12 years. I have a 23 year old and a 18 year old step son. The 23 year old has lived with us for 8 years. His mom and him did not get along and he and I was super close. His mom was always more partial to the younger child. Me and the younger child has never been really close. The BM wasn't at hardly anything my SS done. It was always me. People often mistaken me for his mother. Well fast forward a few years and he had a baby. He was 21 when he was born. Him and baby momma isn't together so we allowed him and the baby to continue living with us. Now, the SS is a complete jerk. He doesn't even talk to me and he keeps the baby from me and my husband. All the sudden BM apologized and told him she was a bad mom and now she is mom of the year. I am honestly to the end of my rope with him. He is getting married in a few months and I am debating on not taking part in the wedding. He's so rude, unappreciative, and disrespectful to me and his dad. I have had all I can take from the both of them....
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Sorry that you are going
Sorry that you are going through this but as Futuro stated above stop making an effort with SS and disengage. I don't think I'd attend the wedding and I'd just live my life without that negativity in it. It always boggles my mind how someone can turn against the very person who loved and cared for them the way you did. You stepped up when BM didn't and now its like all is forgotten.
Keep your head up and take care of you!
Thank you So much! I am so
Thank you So much! I am so happy I found this website and get to talk with other stepparents. My daughter is 12 and she doesn't understand why we aren't seeing the baby, and quite frankly I don't either. The mom is a wonderful mother and has agreed for us to come visit the baby at her house. I have been telling myself one day he's going to need me and I'm not going to be there. I told my husband I had to focus on my bio kids and he can worry about his. I have to have piece of mind and staying away from his is what provides me with that.
Sadly, this seems to be a
Sadly, this seems to be a common theme on here - stepkids who are close to SM until BM suddenly wants to be mom again, then SM is thrown out with the trash. I'm sure he's always wanted a good relationship with his mother, I'm sorry it had to come at your expense. All you can do is disengage and not do anything more for him.
Hopefully he will mature at some point and realize who was there to support him.
Thank you!!! It just seems
Thank you!!! It just seems like sometimes the more you do and the more you try the worse it is. I bet I have not said 10 words to him in 3 weeks. It's actually been peaceful not having to walk on eggshells!
SS23 Being Disrespectful
Im sorry you have to deal with this. As an older Skid, they can go either way, and its painful to put love and attention into them and then they just turn on you.
What is the reason? Did he move out under negative Circumstances? Where is your Dh in all this?
Definitely disengage and dont do anything wrt to the wedding. It is very common for skids to "hold" the grands hostage for various purposes. Very.
I hope your DH is on the same page as yourself...
More detail?
Thanks so much!!! Yep, we can
Thanks so much!!! Yep, we can only hope he will mature. I decided a couple weeks ago I was done and I wasn't going to do anything else for him. He has hurt my husband so bad the way he's treating everyone. The ones that have always been there for him are all the sudden scum of the earth.
Sorry, DH is there during this time and he's treating him the same way. He hasn't moved out yet at all. He told my husband he heard me tell his fiancé that if it hadn't been for the baby he wouldn't be here. He said that meant I would have kicked him out. He said that hurt him more than ever...whatever!!!! His fiancé is even telling him that I never said that and that's not what I meant.