Comes back around to bite one of us or no?
DH has historically been down about his kids not following in his footsteps in things. But DS has, not intentionally, done a lot of the stuff DH did as a teen (like sports and activities). The only thing the skids did like DH that DS did not is hold a job while in HS. That's tough to do when you're in a lot of activities.
There's a new thing now. DS is taking an intro class for DHs profession to see if he likes it. (DS might have tried it anyway without ever meeting DH.) Neither skid is even remotely interested.
Will this come back to bite me or DS? If DS loves it and goes into that profession I'd hope DH would be happy that someone went into his field (and neither me or XH are in that field...and it's not likely DS would end up in our professions). But DH has a way of looking at things as bad rather than good so there are ways he may make this difficult no matter which way it goes. Will he surprise me and be supportive and happy or will he be upset it's not his kid and harder on DS and what he does in the field if he does choose it as a career?
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If he were to make it hard
If he were to make it hard for your DS instead of being supportive I hope you’ll put the stop to it immediately. I can’t imagine how difficult that would be for your son, and I’d hate for him to give up on something he’s interested in because of petty, immature behaviour from your DH. That’s quite concerning tbh, I’d read my DH the riot act if he ever pulled something like that. It’s not your or your DS’s fault his kids aren’t following in his footsteps, he needs to get over himself. It absolutely should not ever come to a point where it bites you or your DS should your DS follows in his footsteps professionally. That’s nothing short of abuse, your son doesn’t deserve that.
Don't let your DH make it
Don't let your DH make it difficult for your son. I switched majors in college from teaching to public health, and my parents (particularly my mom) acted displeased when I told them. They didn't understand why I didn't just become a nurse. It hurts to be excited about your future, only to have the folks you thought would be supportive turn out not to be.
Don't let your DH be negative about this. If he has constructive feedback to offer, that's one thing. But it's already difficult enough to decide what you want to do, and getting negative feedback just because someone wants to be an a-hole isn't helpful.
I really don't understand the
I really don't understand the need for some men to have their sons be clones of them, and not allow them to be their own person (and be HAPPY about who that person is).
My guess is that if your DS takes up his profession, nothing he does will be good enough or right. He won't get good enough grades, he won't try to get work at the right "company", whatever. I hope you will shut it down.
What do you think your kid's
What do you think your kid's motivation for exploring this field is? Is it a field where you feel his talents and personality would be a logical fit? Is it a field that is generally attainable.. and within his capabilities and your resources to help him achieve it?
I mean, let's say he wants to be a vetrinarian.. that is a tough thing to do.. and expensive schooling.. etc...
Is it a common profession or would your husband's lack of support hurt him.?
If he's anything like Chef
DS will get lecture after lecture about how things *should* be done. Lots of unwanted advice. Basically you'll end up with two cooks in the kitchen and we know how that goes. Awesomeson has been exploring electrician/and electrical engineering.
Chef took electrician courses locally (his most recent trade is HVAC) and was valedictorian (he is one of those people who watches someone do something "handy" and he has it down pat; his reading comprehension just isn't there). Of course Chef constantly yammers on about his projects to Awesomeson who also is a High School Math Teacher and in the AF Reserves. I will say that Chef has MINDBLOWING troubleshooting skills and can walk people over the phone through the most complex of operations but couldn't take a sit down test to save his life.
An answer to the above posts and questions
I agree that I will not allow DH to make this difficult for DS. My parents flipped when both my brother and I changed our majors after our freshmen years. And, gasp, we've been successful in this other field, too!
I won't let DH come down on any of them (kid or skids) for what they choose as a major/career. They don't have to be anybody but themselves. The skids aren't going into DH or BMs profession. DS isn't going into my or XHs profession. Yay! Keeps it interesting. DS took a short summer camp about this profession a long time ago and really liked it, and as an overall profession it has a lot of the things he likes to do and it supports some of his focus (for example, he wants to do something to help the environment).
My personal assessment is that DH is insecure and gets validation when his own kids do something he does/did. Depending on what areas DS goes into, DH could help or hurt DS in his career but there are plenty of places DS could work so they may never come in contact with each other besides our family gatherings and maybe some professional association conferences.