Why was he in a bad situation? SHE was in a bad situation, now he's just made it his.  There is no middle unless he puts himself there, his first priority should be you and his minor child who lives in the home.

I know it's easy to say and not easy to do, but this would likely break the relationship for me. He doesn't care about your needs and feelings enough to put them first.

He DID choose her over you.  You made it clear you didn't want her to move in and he moved her in over your objection.  I don't know how else you could view it.  If my husband did that to me, the relationship would be all but over.  I might not move out immediately, but I'd be getting my ducks in a row and planning an exit.  That's not the way a partnership works.

If my husband pulled this crap behind my back, after I told him that I could not handle it, NOBODY would be happy.

My SD asked if she could "stay" with us when she was about 21. She also had 2 kids AND a husband. I told DH absolutely not, no way. He agreed with me. Although, the father in him wanted to be there for his daughter, he knew it was not going to work.

That is actually how I found this site, part of me felt guilty, but not after reading some stories here.

Your husband completely disrespected you.

DH put his DD before you and your child.  His DD us going to disrupt yout home.  You know if she "working ". To 3 am. She will not be home until 10 am   Your DH is going to miss work to take care of her kids.   This is not going to be good.  Your DH does not respect you at all.  
Time to let DH and his DD move into a apartment together. 

No way would a stripping 21YO with two kids be allowed in my house and certainly not around a 10 year old.  This is a horrible example to set.  She can't get welfare because she is making money showing her goodies to everyone with a dollar.  DH needs to fix this now.  

Oh please.  She is a stripper with 3 kids.  Like Chris Rock said, he had one job - to keep her off the pole.  He failed.  And now she is back in his house with her own sex trophies and a CPS case.  Give him a deadline for her to find her next mark and GTFO.

No way would I be tolerating this, no way at all. What a great example your daughter has for a sister. If you had been happy for her to move in, fair enough. But for your DH to allow her to move in after you'd said no is really shit- and yes, he has put SD well and truly above both you and your 10 year old. I would be making life in that house miserable for everyone right now until I knew she was well and truly out the door.

I think this is terrible!  It was wrong of him to put you in this stressful situation, and knowing full well how you felt.  I think he owes you an apology and SD needs to find somewhere else to live, away from your very impressionable young daughter.  It is not YOUR fault or his and you guys are not responsible to make up for HER shortcomings.  If he covers her rear every time she fails at life that will only teach her that she'll always have a place to land when she screws up or pops out more kids.  

Is this for real?? It just seems so outrageous that it's hard to believe.

Take your daughter and leave. She shouldn't be exposed to that trash, and with DHS in the mix, you can't take the risk of them finding drugs etc and removing ALL the children from the home.

If your idiot H won't kick her out, file for divorce, request spousal and child support, and take him to the cleaners. Let him figure out how to enable his trashy daughter AND meet his financial obligations while living under a bridge.

They did not understand the nice way of "no".  Step It Up a notch to "Let me make myself clear."

If that doesn't sink in.  Step It Up to a 30 day Eviction notice for them both.  I actually evicted my DH to SD's house for a few weeks.  When you stop talking and take serious action, it will result into an outcome better for you.

Just last year, my jail bird YSS54 asked to move in with us for "a couple of days."  I didn't even take a breath, I just said "absolutely no."   DH sulked a couple of days; he felt guilty telling SS he couldn't let him do so.   

We are doing well; only because I stepped it up.  I'm very sorry you have to face this.  Do it now, it only gets worse.

Hugs!

And he still told you to shove it and suck it up!! Thats what he did by making an executive decision and moving them into the home. 

Do you pay the mortgage or half of the bills? If you di, end that immediately. Tell darling hubby since he never discussed with you and made an executive decision and you aren’t an equity life partner, you won’t pay.

so sd and her 2 kids (3 people are responsible for 50% of household bills), its obvious she can’t stand on her own 2 feet. If sd is at work, hubby cares for them and if he refuses tell them that you have left the house and they’re on their own or better still say that a strangers kids were dumped at your home and you have called cps and the police to get the kids...

me and hubby intend to buy a home for our kids of our marriage in my country, skids will not be allowed. Since we will be 50-50 with purchasing the home and going by the budget i will likely be paying more like 55-65% of the home (hubby has willed his retirement savings to us) because we have 2 toddlers, 2 of his kids with ex are adults, other one is 14.5  so hubby expects that they will be adults if he dies while ours still in basic schooling and he needs to level the playibg field), i will not allow any skid in ever, they have done everything they could along with their mum to sabotage pur marriage and family life, if hubby nade executive decision to bring his kid in our home or have them fly over for holidays to stay for free, i’d call the cops and tell hubby he has 1 minute to get skid(s) out....

Could you get some legal advice in terms of where you live? If you broke up would they be expected to  leave so you could bring your child up. Or would you have to find somewhere else? 

if my partner did this I would get legal advice. Then calmly present the situation, and if it wasn’t listened to I would present him with a letter saying if she doesn’t move out by such and such date, they can all move out (apart from your bio child of course). 

Your 10yo DD does not deserve to have her life disrupted and her childhood stolen by her adult porn star serial breeder of an elder half sister.  The adult half sister has had her turn to be 10yo. It is now your DD-10's turn and that can't happen with the toxic porn star breeder in the house with her spawn.

If she is working, she can support herself.  Buh-bye to her and her children. NOW!

Purge them from your marriage and your young daughter's daily life.  Visits are fine. No over nights.  SD needs to step up and support herself and her children.

smh

I'm sorry, this would be a no go for me unless it was for a very short time period. Is there a time limit on this arrangement? Is this a "hand up" situation or "daddy take care of me"?  The first thing to do is make sure the baby daddy(s) are paying child support and direct her to file to start the process if she hasn't yet.  She should be able to be elgible for some public assistance. My adult son lives with me and gets SSI, my income is not counted. I know people who live in shared households and get food stamps, WIC, etc.  

Make sure DH really is the one babysitting. Men love pawning the kids off on the women. These are his grands, let him fully enjoy them.