Called my dad yesterday
It was a pretty emotional time yesterday. I called my dad yesterday and when he picked up, I broke down. I managed to just say "dad", and he just lost it.
i've never once heard my dad cry like that before. It was a shocking moment actually. He immediately starting apologizing profusely. He kept saying "I'm so sorry Collin", "Can you ever forgive me Collin" repeatedly. My dad was the "tough" dad growing up. I can't recall him sounding so sincere ever. Just listening to him apologize, I felt like I was 17 all over again.
We talked for a about 2 hours and we just caught up on things. Turns our he has 2 dogs now- he was never the dog person before, so that was kind of shocking. He's still lives in the same house as we did before I moved out. I felt almost lighter in a way-Does that make sense?
He said if he could go back in time and chnage how things ende up, he would do it without any hesitation(that felt nice to hear), and he told me he loved me and was very proud of me (I haven't heard him anything like that in 8 years), and he said "It takes another 8 years for him to fix things, he is willing to do it". I would never make him do anything of the sort. This is about me ad him trying to heal our relationship, and I'm done having my past affect my future. It felt nice to hear though.
I'm meeting him next Saturday for dinner, just me and him. I'm taking things slowly, because it will take time and effort on both ends to heal things between my dad and I, but I'm willing to put in the effort if that means I can have my dad in my life again.
Just a little updat from me,
Collin.
My fiancé kids are coming next week. I'm looking forward to seeing them again. I'm missing ss10 a lot right now.
I think you are doing the
I think you are doing the right thing. Taking it slow, is also the right thing. Good luck.
I know it sounds weird, but I think that going from not being a dog person, to being a dog person, says something. Having dogs means caring about something other than oneself. And dogs can really teach a person about unconditional love. Maybe he is ready to show you how much he cares about you.
I know that some will say, "He's just lonely, now that his wife is gone." Well, sometimes that is what it takes to make us realize what we have done and who we have wronged. It doesn't mean that he is not sincere.
This melted my heart... I’m
This melted my heart... I’m so happy for you!!! You are absolutely doing the right thing, and you will never regret it.
It is amazing how much men’s personalities change as they get older. I was never estranged from my dad.... but he used to be just a grouchy person when I was young (I think I said that in my last response too), and he is so soft hearted now. He was most certainly going through a lot then that you most likely weren’t aware of, and also as a teen you just don’t necessarily always process things in the right light either. All sorts of things can cause strain and make people act how they wouldn’t normally years down the road.
We are in a totally different situation but my DH is VERY alienated from his kids, and I know it breaks him at his core. In this case it is literally no doing of his own, it is the serpent ex wife who is fully responsible.... she has kids with another dad and has done the same to him. Trust me, whatever the reason your dad has been heartbroken, and has thought about you everyday and has hoped and prayed you would contact him.
Reuniting gives you both a chance to heal. Don’t have huge expectations, just enjoy getting to know him- and make sure you take care of yourself as well.
That feeling of lightness
sounds wonderful! Im so glad you had that. When I cry, afterwards I feel lighter too, its such a good release, like when rainclouds release their rain, they "lighten up".
I dont know your story with your relationship, but when healing happens, it changes our lives drastically in many directions.
Glad for you
Powerful story- wow, your dad.
I thought of you today when I received a text from my mom, who I've been in touch with this year after nearly 20 years of not talking to or visiting my parents (they're still "together"). I'm taking it slow, too.
Sometimes that Don Henley song chorus runs through my mind:
... I think it's about Forgiveness, forgiveness...
This is great news for you,
This is great news for you, your dad and your blended family. Continue your healing journey Collin.
Keep kicking butt in you your life.
Enjoy dinner with your dad.