Yet another "findings" came in from the Special Ed Dept. As you may know, there's nothing wrong with VD except that she's been spoiled from birth and allowed to do as she pleases as mommykin's BFF. VD is functioning academically at a 2nd grade level; physically however, she looks like she is at least 18 years old. Notice how the report does a fancy fox trot around the humongous pachyderm in the living room:

Here are some of the LOW lights:

Evaluation and Recommendations:

They recommend that VD continue her "special services" under "Other Health Impairment"
(Editor's note: the Behemoth got VD tested several times and each time she tested "normal." She kept testing until she got the "diagnosis that she wanted--learning disabled--other)

The committee considered having VD spend more time within the "general education environment" (formerly known as "mainstreaming" for those children who had REAL disabilities) but rejected the idea due to VD's current functioning levels and skills (those of a 2nd grader)

The Behemoth is in agreement of all of this (of course)

Math: VD has good fundamentals in math. She basically knows her math facts and understands math cognition. (basically?--either you know or you don't know in math) New math concepts escape her. She struggles to process any problems that are multi step or include word problems. (Too much effort required and mommykins says she doesn't have to) She benefits from reteaching of material to retain and practice new material (Editor's note: DUH who doesn't?) VD needs to have her spirals and homework checked before turning them in (Behemoth, where ARE you?) She has a tendency to rush through using her background knowledge instead of using the new process and content she has been taught.

Reading: VD's lexile has increased dramatically this school year. Her lexile was 452 in the fall and 793 this winter (hmm I see a pattern here; this isn't the first report that has brought this out; seems during summer vacation, her brain falls out. . .a good argument for banishing summer vacation if your lexile score drops over 300 points) VD still struggles in her content area classes with comprehension, decoding, written expression and spelling. VD has improved her level in independence this school year but needs to continue to use her services in order to gain the strategies to meet her goals. (remember this statement about "independence")

Study Skills: VD's limited vocabulary and confusion of background knowledge leads to VD thinking she knows the material but she easily gets information confused (hmmmm a KNOW IT ALL--not unlike the Behemoth and GG) VD does not spend as much time as she needs to make connections of new material or review for tests and quizzes (Hmmm maybe that FB post that VD made about everyone needs to back off about her grades would seem interesting at this point)

Writing: VD's writing is impacted by her spelling difficulties, her limited vocabulary, and her difficulties organizing her thoughts. (At this point GG would be going AWWWWW chip off the 'ol block--and beaming with PRIDE :sick:) VD's writing is very basic and does not include supporting details of her topic. She needs to continue to develop her spelling and decoding in order to assist her in the writing process.

Student Strengths, Preferences and Interests: VD is highly organized on an independent level (this statement totally conflicts everything that has been said in this report up to now) Her locker and notebook are very well kept (Ummm yeah if you don't ever bring books to school, leave them at home and never do any homework or classwork, yeah it would appear that you were well organized and "well kept.") :sick: When asked, VD stays in the zone to keep up with assignments and getting them checked (WTF??!!) So basically she needs to be PRODDED to do anything.

Academic, Developmental and Functional Needs of the Student, INCLUDING CONSIDERATION OF STUDENT NEEDS THAT ARE OF CONCERN TO THE PARENT: VD needs to develop decoding strategies which will help her read grade level material more independently. She needs to practice fluent reading in challenging texts to build sight word vocabulary. She needs to use a self check strategy while reading to catch miscues that interrupt meaning. She needs to use key word strategies for math word problems. (This all makes the case that VD has been free ranged from birth as no one is making her do more challenging material nor do they have any real expectations of her other than to smile cutely with her rosey red cheeks, curly blonde hair and blue eyes)

(And here's the money phrase) ParentS are supportive of academic and long term goals. REALLY??!! GG was told by this very same department that is issuing this report that his opinion didn't matter as he's the NON-custodial parent. This statement should be interpreted as "The Behemoth and Snuffleupagus are giving lip service to all of this and feigning concern"

Social Development (here's where it gets interesting) VD has a tendency to be very stubborn. (No shit sherlock; she's been spoiled and given what she wants with zero expectations, boundaries or structure since popping out of the Behemoth's hoo hoo) She will argue her point and not accept a teacher's answer. (GG beaming with pride again "chip off the ol' block") :sick: She does not come across as rude (really? I found her extremely rude and ill mannered) but this has an impact on her ability to learn if she is not open to constructive criticism or refocusing (Ya THINK??!) And now for the standard "good kid" obligatory phrase: VD is very outgoing and well liked by her peers and adults.

Student strengths: VD states that she enjoys theatre, sports and music. (AWWWWWW)

VD needs to be able to refocus when she gets off task. Mom is concerned about her stubborness but is aware of VD's strong sense of independence from a young age (So we went from the "she's just a kid, lighten up" to "she's too old to change" classic free ranging excuses)

Physical development: Appears age appropriate (she looks like she's at least 18) Medication taken for attentional concerns (I KNEW it! All three skids on ADHD meds; I remember when VD last came to our house over three years ago b/c her mother had no other place to dump her off at and she had no other choice. . . she literally had TICS and was constantly blinking her eyes; I knew she was on meds back then, but of course, GG will miss this statement)

Student strengths (phys dev) VD is involved in extra curricular sports (Good move with her low F average, Behemoth)

VD requires encouragement and prompting (Sigh, there's that pesky PARENTING again!!) She requires small group instruction. She needs to be made aware ahead of time when lengthy assignments will be assigned to help with planning, organization and anxiety. Lengthy assignments may need ot be shortened due to frustrations levels (once again PISS POOR PARENTING from birth onwards) VD needs copies of all classroom notes. VD needs preferential seating in front of the classroom (these students who were moved from the back of the class to the front used to be called "troublemakers.")

VD's short attention span and difficulty applying reading comprehension strategies affect her ability to complete assignments (guess those meds aren't working, eh? point of no return once you free range a kid to his point)

Then a whole checklist of things that truly disabled children need such as special equipment etc with a whole bunch of "not needed" and "N/As" written after them.

I smell TROUBLE for the Behemoth and GG in the very near future. A stubborn, "independent" free ranged teen with low social, coping and academic skills!! Gotta put out more ads for my book to hasten my EXIT plan from GG!!! Abandon ship! Abandon ship!

Side note: of course there is MONEY in all this as the Behemoth checks off VD as "disabled" on her taxes plus her two foster children. I'm sure she's getting ready to label Prince Hygiene as "disabled" as well in the near future for more taypayer $$$$