Summer II
AHHHH. What's making me the most angry right now is that I let that little snot nosed bully infuriate me. If he were my BioS I would look at him and laugh and say get over yourself, take your flippin $246 medicine and stop being nasty. But no, I let him make me angrier and angrier.
When I heard him wake up and go to my BioD's bathroom I said hey SS and I get a WHAT?!?!?!? from him I said please use my bathroom (reason being the kid already peed on my daughter's toothbrush - and don't tell me it wasn't on purpose, he was 7 -and I don't think it's fair that my daughter has to put up with that.
Then he comes out in his pull-up and stands at the window, mind you there are people out there cutting down trees. I told him look get away from the window. You don't want people knowing you still wear those. The reason I say this is he has no concept of personal boundaries. When he lived with his mother he would run around the house naked at 5 when his 12 and 13 yr old half sisters had friends over. I never allowed that at my house. And then when I started making him wear pull-ups at 5 because I was tired of washing sheets everyday, SS7 thought it was cool to walk thru the house and show everyone. I said hold on buddy they are just like underwear and at my house you wear clothes. You don't walk around in your underwear here (especially when there are 15 year old girls here) that was 2 years ago - what happened that all of a sudden he forgets that?? Just like flushing the toilet-I know kids forget but when I ask him if he did it he is like yeah I flushed, only to find out nope he didn't - like everyother time...I know it sounds like I'm picking but it's basic stuff that gets on my nerves!
Then since he is up - like wide awake cause he asked me 50 questions about why there are people over there cutting the tree, who called them, who are they, and then the same questions again - I asked him to take his meds. You would think I am asking him to eat stewed tomatoes??? Forget it I can't push them down his throat so fine. I'll let his dad handle it but then it will be 4 o'clock in the afternoon and way too late to take them.
I tried to ask him on Monday why he is so mad at me all the time and what did I do to make him feel that way. I don't know is the answer I get when I press harder he says cause I feel like it. I said well you didn't treat your old baby sitter that way, why me...he says cause I like her. I said so you don't like me, and he says I didn't say that...ok. Why won't you listen to me and he says I don't want to and I don't feel like it. Thanks kid. I gave up a lot and changed a lot for you and this is the crap I get. My kid gave up a lot and deals with a lot more than most would, she really appreciates it too.
When I was growing up my parents expected certain things out of me. I can't even attempt that with SS7. And my BioD has had about enough of it. Why is it fair that I expect and punish her but can't do that to him-simply put it's shitty. But now my parents think I try to get too much out of him. Seriously, take your pills, lift the toilet seat so that you don't pee all over the lid, flush the toilet, at least attempt to wash your hands, and don't put so much food in your mouth that you can't breathe-LITERALLY the kid was gagging one day from shoving so much food in his mouth. There has always been enough food for him, we always have leftovers, he has never wanted for anything. My DH says that's because at his BM's the older kids always ate all the food-then how come when he came to live with us he was no longer obese...he still ate all he wanted but it was real food, not junk. I don't think that the kid had to fight for food, he thinks it's funny, like he will laugh, when he takes the last piece of pizza-he rubs it in. And I guess that's normal? but my daughter would never have been allowed to act that way. It's just not nice?
Sorry just had to vent...
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Really at my wits end! The
Really at my wits end!
The easy thing to do is say FU*k IT. I give up but I don't want to cause I know it's the wrong thing. But the kid is the most HATEFUL, RUDE, HURTFUL, AND PSYCHOTIC person I've ever known. If I didn't love his dad I would have nothing to do with him-I know it's wrong but I can't stand it anymore. So it's not right to show anger or frustration with him cause he plays off that so WTF do I do???????? SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW...
Positive update...the light
Positive update...the light switch has been flipped!! It was a wonderful day. Don't know how or why but I'm not asking questions!