How in the world did he think he flattered you by telling another woman about your oral abilities?

He should have called her a tramp (choose your poison on that one) and told her to get away

Um, I think he was bragging to you. Men like to gloat about all the women that find them hot. I still remember my dh telling me about two young (lke 18) girls that offered him a ride when his truck broke down. He thought they were really into him.

He wants you to know he was hit on (becaue it feeds his ego) but perhaps he also knows it would cause trouble if you knew who it was. IMO, and this is only my opinion, is that people in committed relationships dont need to be hanging out at bars alone for this very reason. Too many dumb drunk people causing too many problems.

Wow...your husband had no business discussing anything personal about you with any man or woman. Unbelieable he allowed personal information about you to a stranger.

And husband doesn't tell you who this woman is?

My opinion...husband up to something. This is nasty nasty bad and so disrectful to you. He owes you an explanation and you owe him a kick in his arse!!

What a jerk he is for doing that to you. For any comments about you and for repeating the conversation.

Really sorry for you, been through that bull myself and it's rough!

My personal opinion is that I agree with the other poster who said he was trying to brag. If any of us women told our man how often we got hit on we would have nothing left to talk about because it would be story after story. I think he told you because women hitting on men happens less and less especially since everyone in your popular hang out spot knows about you. He was probably really excited she was into him because it doesnt happen that often. I think he didnt tell you her name because he doesnt want you to confront her. I think this because that would probably lead to a cat fight and then the other girl wont hit on him anymore or other females wont. Men like the attention just as much a women do. He may never go for her or want to or it may never cross his mind but the attention is fun for him. He told you so he could share the excitement except you didnt like it lol. I am sorry it upset you and she is 100% as trampy as they come. Who hits on a taken man with the prospect of getting oral and wanting to compare her skills to hers?? Weird

I have been in a similar bar situation with my DH. He was a regular there before he met me & then I got to know the others there through him. In my time there, I came to see that people there were willing to "cover" for others. They had the mentality that "What happens at ... stays at ...". SO's & spouses come in & nothing is said about their partners ill behavior. There were too many secrets for my liking.

There were a few nights where people had too much to drink & seemed to be oblivious to the fact that I was, in fact, standing right there & they would start hanging on DH. I will say he did back away, but that was only effective for the moment. He should've been vocal. Those women are the ones who brought to light, for me, the idea of respect between women...or lack of. They were all nice to my face, but when I wasn't around or they seemed to forget that I was around, they were showing their newest piercings & approaching him to discuss the names they've chosen for their "girls".

It was that sort of behavior that brought our bar days to a screeching halt.

Personally, I am one who wants to know things. If someone we knew was making a move on him behind my back, I would want to know, but I would also want to know that I could count on him to make his position clear with them. I'm not satisfied with the calmly backing away or running away. I feel like he should make it clear that her advances are unwanted & inappropriate.

I would be upset about it too if I were you. The other replies make good points, like he could have been bragging on you, or making this up to make you jealous. Either way, eww. Why would this woman be questioning him about your fellatio skills? And comparing it to how she could do it? Has she actually sucked his dick before, is that why she is asking? And why can't he tell you her name, that's ridiculous. If you know her, then you have the right to know who has disrespected you to the man that you are committed to. If something like this happened to my DH, he most likely would have told me about it too. But there is no way that if he told me something like that, that he would get away with withholding the woman's name. If someone asked my DH if I could go down on him like she could, he better be walking away or asking this person "Who the fuck are you?" or "Stay away from me whore!"

I wouldn't make it a huge deal, but it is weird. Most likely since he was at a bar, this woman was shitfaced and talking out of her ass because she thought he was attractive. He should tell you who she is, and then you should tell him that he needs to respect your wish for him to not engage in conversations that require him to judge your ability to go down on him.

Men. Are. Ridiculous. Thank you for sharing your story because some days I wonder if I'm the only one with a SO that thinks he's HOTT AS S%^&! I was just telling a friend the other day that I cannot wait for the day some little pretty will look at My SO when he hits on her and goes "eww your old" !!

If you live in a small town you'll find out more. Don't get too upset yet. Also I feel that if he is telling you even if it hurts or ticks ya off... I'd rather know but that's just me. When you stop hearing about all these chicks hitting on him THEN you should worry.

I wouldn't be terribly offended by it, after all it sounds like she is just some skanky bar ho. Can't possibly have an ounce of class to be acting like that. This is exactly why I hate hanging out in bars....no offense to you, to each their own, but I just can't deal with the bar fly, bar ho scene.

My DH is a musician, plays lots of bars. Lots of women love musicians, love hanging at bars, or have a substance abuse problem, but pretty much nothing shocks me. I can so see him reacting the way your DH did because he wouldn't know what else to say to make it clear that he wasn't interested in her, uhm, talents. And I can see him telling me about it. He'd either think it was funny or he'd be uncomfortable about it or something.

Really, and I know my opinion is in the minority here, I wouldn't make a big deal about it other than to let him know his reaction was just as trashy as the come-on and it bothers you.

But not telling you is a little more troubling, though, and I wonder what that's about. Pretty sure my DH would tell me and knowing the sleezeballs at the bar he plays most frequently, I'd just roll my eyes. Not enough penicillin in the world to even shake hands with those gals. I have no idea why some women apparently TRY to look cheap and easy. No clue.

The fact that he wont tell you who it is is what makes me uneasy. The rest is just a typical bar encounter with a trashy bar ho....but because he wont tell you who it is...its like he's leaving himself an oppurtunity to entertain it in the future. You cant very well tell him not to talk to this person or to stay away from her if you dont know who it is. I would make him tell me. If he refused I would ask him why. Maybe it is a mutal friends gf/sister and it would put you in an awkward spot to know....maybe she is nasty and it's embarrassing, but regardless unless he is willing to tell you who it is he should have kept his mouth shut. I would explain that it makes you uneasy to know that there is someone at the bar coming onto him and you dont know who it is. Can you immagine next time your sitting in the bar together...you are going to be wondering about every women that walks by or glances your DH's way..."is that the women!?" It will drive you crazy...it might even make you more hypersensitive about females that speak to him. If he doesnt want that, then he better tell you!

I think you should insist he tell you who it was. Otherwise he is protecting her, and that would be hard for me to accept.

It is like he is saving that offer, just in case? My ASS if I could accept that.

Sorry dear.

I think that he should tell you who it was, since you know her. I mean, why would he mention that?? I guess it kind of comes with the territory when you have a job like that, and she's just some trashy ho. I agree with the others it's like he's protecting her from you, when it should be the other way around. If my DH tells me about some chick who hit on him I'm supposed to be OK with it, but if i tell him someone had interest in me, he gets super angry and inquisitive.

It's just going to make you hypervigilant and uneasy the next time you go to your hangout (which should be all about good times and good memories for you two). I'd demand to know who it was and suggest that neither of you hang out alone at the bar again.

That's ridiculous. Why tell you and then withhold her name? I would be fuming. I would absolutely demand to know who the woman was and then I would definitely confront her!