I tried and really did want it to work, but we both had to really want it. We had one counseling appointment together 2 1/2 weeks ago and ex-FDH refused to go back for the next one, instead he decided that going out on the boat and drinking with his buddy was more important than working on us and said he'd call me when they got back in that night. Well, I didn't hear from him since he left to go on the boat (that was Saturday morning) and so today, I finally broke down and called him and said I wouldn't continue to play this little game he is playing and that I was tired of it and since he won't put any effort into working things out then I'll make the decision to just end it. I told him I would not continue to go on like this, that either we both wanted it to work or forget it. He wasn't too happy, some choice words were said and he said some things that given where we are at I'm not sure if they are even forgivable. He got pretty mean.

I tried to not cry and be rude, but he said things that yes they were out of frustration and being hurt, but I'll admit I got rude right back and told him that maybe if he could be a parent and not treat his son like he was his fiance, that this would have never of happened. That I would not continue to be treated like crap by his son and be expected to take it and not say or do anything - his son is 18 so he is old enough to know exactly what he is doing. Unfortunately, ex FDH is a guilty parent who thinks that his kids can do no wrong and that because they have a 4.0 he overlooks everything else. His kids have never gotten any consequences or punishment for anything that they have done - including when his son drank so much he had to have his stomach pumped and when his daughter (16) threw a party & had unprotected sex.

I tried the disengaging and unfortunately for me, it backfired. ex FDH did not come around and it just caused more problems between us. His son got even more angry towards me for it and complained even more about me to his dad and seemed to make it his mission to get us to break up. Well he finally succeeded, I can't blame him for it totally, I blame ex FDH for not having the balls to be a parent.

Anyway, we are supposed to meet tomorrow so that he can give me the money that I put into his house to have a bedroom and bathroom built (although he is fighting me it and about the amount) and so that I can give him the ring back. I really did not want this to be the outcome, but I want to be happy, I deserve to be happy, and unfortunately I was not happy anymore because of his son. I just wish things could have turned out differently, I wish that ex FDH love me enough to enforce his kids to be respectful, they didn't have to like me, but they could've just stopped the complaining and trying to force their dad to choose. I loved him and at one point I loved his kids, but over the past year or two, his son killed any love or caring that I had for him and his daughter succeeded in killing it in the last couple of months.