Again with the SLOBS!!
This is a constant argument between DH and me. For some stupid reason, skids BM and my DH never taught these skids (NOT children: SD16, SS22) how to keep their rooms clean. I swear, my DH is such a coward when it comes to telling the skids what to do!!
I told him ten days ago to have the skids clean their rooms. He ignored me. I reminded him again the day he told me to spray SD16's room for fleas. "Have her clean her room and I'll spray for fleas." He ignored me. I mentioned it to him last night again and he ignored me. After the third time of being ignored, I got an attitude and he asks why I have an attitude so I told him. I don't like being ignored. So he goes to the Princess' room to tell her to clean her room. I don't know how he walks into that room with all the clothes and trash on the floor! I could just hear him: "Baby girl, you should try to pick up your room. I know you come home tired from school and you're a good girl. You're doing really good. Just try to pick up, okay baby?"
Ugh!!! Then he calls SS22 (SS22 is staying with his girlfriend for the weekend, a common occurrence). He tells SS22 (A GROWN FU@$ING MAN) that when he comes back home he needs to clean his room.
Then the tension starts between me and DH! He turns his back on me when we go to bed. Doesn't talk to me for the whole night. How the hell am I the bad guy here? I'm not asking his children (grown children) to wash my car, clean my bathroom, or even clean the kitchen or living room. Why does he prefer to have conflict between he and I instead of just getting those skids to act like responsible citizens of our family?
He basically told me on the phone that if they haven't learned how to do it already, they're not going to do it. I told him, "I'm not gonna keep having this conflict with you every time the rooms need cleaning. Why am I paying the consequences? You should be fighting with the skids, not me." I continued to tell him the skids need to show some consideration and keep the part of the home we've given to them clean and neat. I told him he needs to sit those two skids down and tell them not to wait for him to tell them to clean their rooms. They need to clean the rooms without being told every two weeks. They aren't babies!!! WTF!!!
So I guess my DH would rather fight with me than teach his own offspring how to keep the rooms we provide clean. How can I tolerate this until these crappy kids leave?!!!
- lisa510's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
If you get an answer for
If you get an answer for anything you just said please god let me know....New to this site...not sure how to type with all the abbreviates...since him and I arent married...but I do feel for you because when it is anything that involves his daughter no so much his son but his daughter I might as well be talking to a rock outside...she is almost 11 and I am telling you that I have seen many kids in my life(work in public school system) this kid is in need of so much help...yet its like he is waiting on me to do...yet I seem to be stepping over my boundary lines! He can't have it both ways either we agree to work together or he takes him and his and hit the door running!
Baby girl, you should try to
Baby girl, you should try to pick up your room. I know you come home tired from school and you're a good girl. You're doing really good. Just try to pick up, okay baby?"
++++++++++++++++++++++
DH talks to SS like this too. Makes me wanna puke.
I am not a big fan of making kids keep a spotless room. BUT, we also do not allow kids to have ANY, drinks, food, candy, or anything like that in their bedrooms. If they want to live in a few feet of dirty clothes. Oh well.
And the funny thing is that my DH used to say..."if SS ever moves in with me, that he would not let him keep his room messy like my my kids." This was years ago.
We have all lived together now about 10ish month. My daughter keeps her room spotless. And I mean spotless. My son has matured over the past few years and his room is pretty clean. You can barely open the door to SS's room for all the shit. Oh well, not my problem.
I guess I get hung up on the
I guess I get hung up on the fact that kids should be team players in a home. They should take care of the room their parents provide them and respect their parents' requests. I also resent the fact that I pay the mortgage for this home with DH and I like a clean home. I guess it's one thing if you're a sloppy kid, but it's another if you blatantly ignore your father when he tells you to do something -- time after time!!
I found recently that you
I found recently that you only need two tools to deal with situation like this. My DS11 and SS12 share a room. It looked, recently, like an atom bomb had gone off in there. They were warned. They were told to clean it up. They were finally given the ultimatum, "You clean it up, or I'm going to, and if I clean it up, you won't like the results". They declined the opportunity to clean it up.
I took a snow shovel from the garage and a trash can. I put the trash can outside the door. I used the shovel to pick up everything that the vaccuum wouldn't suck up. I shoveled clothes, toys, shoes, and I'm pretty sure at least one iPod, into the garbage can. I shoveled off the desk. I raked the top of the dresser into the can as well. Then I took it outside and bagged it up, and put the bag in the outside trash, and on Tuesday of that week, it disappeared forever.
I may have to do this again, but I sincerely doubt it. You could eat off that floor right now, it's so clean. Small bonus, my girls have been keeping their room much cleaner after the garbage/shovel extraction day. Thank God DH backs me up! Otherwise this may have been world war 3!