Well I hope most of you had a better weekend than I did. Here it goes:

DH goes off on Sat morning to a fishing trip with friends. I'm left alone with SS22 and SD16 and SS22's weekend girlfriend. I'm laying in bed reflecting on my life. Paying bills for skids, not seeing my own bio kids enough, alone in the house, blah blah blah...

Stress is setting in and I decide to smoke cigarettes - I haven't smoked in 6 months. I'm not happy with my life. Skids are slobs, don't relate to me, disrespect DH, and on and on and on....

DH comes home and I tell him, "oops, I smoked today." He flies off the handle, throwing shit everywhere and expressing how upset he is about that.

I want to talk about my investing in this home and skids and not getting anything out of it. He's concentrating on the fu@king smoking.

We drive to Walmart parking to talk in the car. Skids are home and I don't want them to hear us fight (yes, I care about that). When I tell him his 22 y/o son doesn't deserve to move into the bigger bedroom in the house b/c 22 y/o can't keep his smaller bedroom clean, he blows his top, gets out of the car, slams the door, and walks home.

BACKGROUND- we're building a bigger master bedroom on to the house b/c ours doesn't have a full bath. His 22 y/o son is a slob!!! His room always smells and is always a mess. He wants his 22 y/o son to move into the old master bedroom. I have two bio sons that sleep in the living room when the come over. I also don't have office space. MY LOGIC : WHY WOULD I GIVE A SLOB A BIGGER SPACE TO BE A BIGGER SLOB!! I'd rather put a bed and futon in there, put my desk in there and use the room for my bio kids and my office. I DO PAY THE MORTGAGE TOO.

I get home (remember he left me at the Walmart parking lot) and he's outside with skids talking. We end up talking to the skids about cleanliness of their rooms. They don't care. They say, "What does it matter? Their our rooms!" SS22 asks his Dad if he really wants their rooms clean. So I speak up. I tell them: "your dad wants you guys to keep your rooms clean, but you're disrespectful and don't listen to him. you ignore him. why does he have to blow his top before either one of you do what he says?"

DH expresses to them that I take care of them too, through paying the bills and food and insurance on their cars. They don't care. They hate me even more, esp SD16. She's such a bitch! She stood there with total attitude and DH is such a pussy - he just keeps talking and talking.

We go inside finally. Well, DH continues fighting about the smoking. Starts blocking my way in our bedroom, telling me to look at him when he's talking to me, standing really close to me.....I'm seeing red flags every where!

Later he's reading all the text messages between my and my sister. Then he actually accuses me of having an affair!!! OMFG!!! I'm home ALL day with the fucking stupid lazy skids!!!

Forget the skids. I may be in bigger trouble.