Can I get THIS MIL???!!!!
I was just talking with a friend of mine (who happens to be the product of a blended family) and she was giving me some insight into her own situation growing up. Her BD had children from his first marriage with a typical, psycho BM. My friend's BM, her BDs current wife, was going through much of the same guilty daddy mess that many of us here are dealing with. The situation got so bad that her mom filed for a divorce....here's the shocker....
When my friend's BDs MOTHER heard about what was going on, she made a trip from Jamaica, where she was living, to talk some sense into her son! She told him "Son, this is you family, now, you divorced your first wife, you knew it would be tough on everyone, deal with it!" According to my friend, it was this that saved her parents' marriage!
WOW!!!!! My MIL would tell my DH the exact opposite! LOL!
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Wow, Blender. Thanks for
Wow, Blender.
Thanks for sharing that. What a wonderful story! It must have made you feel so good to know that the ILs are behind you guys 100%. I think that if more ILs, especially MILs mothered instead of smothered, a lot of blended families would have a much greater chance at success.
Your story is truly heart-warming.
I'm there. MIL hates XW and
I'm there. MIL hates XW and "likes" me if I'm passive. If I have an opinion about how to raise the kids that differs from her own she lashes out on me. She treat my son (her 1st and only grandson) like he is not as important as SD.
My 2 bios like her but they ask me why she likes SD more than them.
My 9 year old asked my MIL "Why does SD get everything she wants?"
MIL - "You get stuff from your grandma too!"
BD9 - "I know, I don't want you to buy me stuff. I love you whether you buy me stuff of not."
MIL _ "I buy you guys stuff all the time."
BD9 - " I like it when you bring me presents, but I love you anyway."
MIL - "Your grandma buys you stuff all the time. I'm just not going to buy you kids anything anymore."
I intervened and changed the subject.
MIL called my husband up and told him my daughter was being a little snot.
MIL is still mad at BD9. She didn't hear a word my daughter was trying to say. She's so materialistic.
"MIL is still mad at BD9. She
"MIL is still mad at BD9. She didn't hear a word my daughter was trying to say. She's so materialistic."
Yep...says a lot for her character, being mad at a 9 year-old and all.
Lovely.
Appalled at societies lack of
Appalled at societies lack of social skills.
I teach my kids social skills step by step.
Example from Boys Town social skills program. (they have steps for everything, it's awesome!)
Following directions:
1. Look at the person
2. Say "ok"
3. Do the task immediately
4. Check back.
My kids (also have step mom w/ XH) exhibit above average maturity and insight. (they are not perfect by any means they just have been taught consistently) Maybe because I'm a psych major. Then I get adults like MIL pulling crap like this.
My DH and XH take the kids places (like the circus)TOGETHER. no joke. They go fishing together sometimes. They never knew each other before me.
My kids benefit from this. I do 50/50 w/ XH and it works. We have no formal arrangement. We work together to for the interest of our kids. It's so easy 99% of the time.
Now DH and his XW are the extreme opposite and his child is the problem.
Yes, and the fact that MIL is
Yes,
and the fact that MIL is dead set on not allowing DH to leave the past in the past is driving me nuts. She texted him yesterday to tell him that BD5 has a sinus infection but is feeling better and he needs to call her. Why are YOU the messenger, MIL? BTW, she knew that she was interrupting our "fun" day with my BIOs.
My mom let me know in no
My mom let me know in no uncertain terms that my second marriage would not fail ..... period. My XW left me for a geriatric Fortune 500 Executive sugar daddy when I was 26. We had been married 26mos. My mom was very supportive during the divorce.
When I decided to propose to my beautiful bride my mom sat me down and told me that I owed my new wife and myself the respect of being fully committed and engaged in the marriage. She also let me know that if I let this marriage fail that I would not have the equipment to enjoy a third marriage.
Elena Bobbit is a personal hero of my mother's. When my dad, bro or I are messing with her a little too much she pulls out the kitchen sheers, gives us a purposeful evil look and clicks the sheers a few times to let us know that we are pushing it........ }:)
If you are reading this ...... I love you mom! :O
Best regards,
LOL!!!! I like your mom...can
LOL!!!!
I like your mom...can you get her to talk to my DH????!!!!!