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I wish I could go back...

minerva385's picture

About two years ago, my Hubby and I were homeless. It wasn't intentional, although what homelessness is? We had given notice on our apartment, because we were to move into a house that one of his good friend's parents owned and was going to rent out to us. They weren't going to charge us a deposit, so we hadn't saved any money for this. Well, it came time that we needed to be out of our apartment, but the house wasn't ready for us to move into yet. (The whole time it was, "yeah it'll be ready we just have to to A, B, C, etc)

This came at a time where I was supposed to help move, then get on a plane to see my dying grandma, and then come home and start my new job, all in a weeks time frame.

I can't remember how everything came about but I do remember that we were going to go about 6 weeks without a full paycheck. The company Hubby worked for was already failing at that point. He was getting barely 10 hours per week of work, if even that, with promises that there would be more hours soon...(did not happen if you already couldn't guess).

Anyways, moving in with his parents wasn't an option since they lived 100 miles away from where I worked and I barely had gas money as it was. My parents were not an option since they don't even live in the same state as me. So that left us with only one option as we saw it...we went camping. The first two weeks we stayed at a campground near my work. We had an electrical site and used quarter showers. I kept my work clothes in a zip up plastic bag so they wouldn't end up smelling like campfire. After those two weeks (you can't stay at a state park more that 14 days in a 30 day period) it got a little trickier. We squated on some land that my husband used to play at and build forts on as a kid, I would shower during the week at a truck stop every other day because it was $10 to shower and that wasn't really in our budget. On the weekends we would camp in the mountains at a spot we knew that was free.

It was really tough, but I also remember it as being one of the happiest times of my life. I don't remember stressing about money as much as I do now, even though then we had the least money of all. I remember Hubby and I getting a long much greater than we had in ages(he was on the cusp of being sober, but didn't know how to go about it yet...the drinking was less and not angry anymore but still happening on a daily basis). I also remember learning a lot of different things...

I learned that canned food with pop tops were a godsend and that you HAVE to open them a little before putting them in the fire or else they will explode. I learned that people we label as "dirty hippies" are some of the greatest souls I will meet and will likely give the shirt off their back if they could and will NOT let you go hungry if they have food to share...even if they don't have it to share they'll share it anyways. I learned the value of shade since that was one of the hottest summers my state had seen (90+ degrees for three weeks straight). I learned that living in your swimsuit three days a week was not a bad thing. I learned how to pack my car with as much stuff as humanely possible. I learned that Febreeze is amazing when you get to work and realize you really do smell like you sat in the middle of a campfire. I learned that going to bed and getting up with the sun was amazing, but not nearly as amazing as going to bed and getting up with my husband every single day.

We're having money issues, as of late and it gets me thinking...Even though we are "better off" now than before by societies standards I would give anything to go back. Go back to that feeling of simplicity, where all that really mattered was having a safe place to sleep, food to eat, and gas in the car. We had a lot less then, but really we had a lot more...........

Comments

TheOtherMom's picture

This is a test to your character.
I know girls who honestly believe suicide is better than homelessness.
Thank you for your post.

Sita Tara's picture

I am looking forward to simplicity in all I am losing currently. I've realized that I had far "less" monetarily before meeting STBX, but felt like I had everything I needed most of the time. I had a huge nest egg I never tapped into til we met, and now it's gone Sad

But I believe I will build that up again. I feel anxiety about having to penny pinch again, but remember how thrilling it was to have my own money and not have to feel like I had to put things for my sons off b/c I'm not the one making the money to pay for it.

Thanks for a thought provoking post. I have often thought if we really let go of attachment to things, even if not homeless, but only having around us what we really need, that all of us would find a lot more happiness and be more present in our lives.