Yeah, I've decided that I can't let BM get to me anymore, however, the follow-through will be the tough part! Especially since whenever she emails my husband, I can tell just by his mood. But again, once we go to court, we're hoping to have some boundaries set for BM. And the judge will get copies of all the emails she's sent him with threats, lies, demands, etc.

My husband & I had this discussion this past weekend. It was more of a fight than a discussion, but I made it clear how I felt. I can't continue to deal with this nonsense. I told him that I didn't even care how things went at this point & he got mad at me because I don't want SD9 here as much as he does. SD9 would be better off with us full-time, but if that doesn't happen, that's it. No more fighting it. BM wins. I've come to realize that if we do get SD9 full-time, BM is going to make our lives even more of a living hell, so that's the main reason I don't care anymore. (We'd combat it with boundaries from the judge & a restraining order, if necessary.) But either way has it's upsides & downsides. The only reason I have to stay somewhat involved is because of court. I thought about not going, but I really do need to be there to support my husband. But after that, I'm done!

Oh, and my "puppy" is actually 6 years old, but he does act like a puppy still!

I know where you're coming from...I spend days, even weeks dealing with these things that get thrown our way. And for what? I just get aggravated & worry about what's going to happen, what will happen if we do this, what will happen if we do that. It's all pointless. Especially when my husband & I have different views on how to deal with certain things. It puts a rift between us. Yeah, I know this is his situation to deal with, however, I have to live with the outcome of it.

So after our fight over the weekend, I gave up. He wants to deal with the current situation in a way that gives BM everything she wants. He thought my way of dealing with it might upset SD9. We had no other options because once again BM backed him into a corner. I tried to explain to him that sometimes he might have to risk possibly upsetting SD9 in order to stand up to BM, but he wouldn't hear it. Instead, he handed BM exactly what she wanted. I think it might hurt us in court, but oh well. This is where I decided that I'm done! Why am I fighting so hard when my husband won't? With the exception of having to pay BM child support, my life will become easier if SD9 is only with us every other weekend. Part of me wishes now that I had kept my mouth shut a few months ago when my husband was about to hand over custody to BM (just to be done with this nonsense & to spare SD9 the drama of this). But noooo....I wanted my husband to fight BM because if she gets full custody, SD9 doesn't stand a chance in life. She'll be just like BM. That's if she even makes it to adulthood the way BM keeps an eye on her & takes care of her.

I don't how, but you need to find a way to look forward to your wedding & throw yourself into planning it or at least dreaming about it. Something. This is what I'm learning to do (it's not easy!). PM me if you want to talk about what happened. I'll gladly listen to you! Things will get better....SOMEDAY!

Thanks! Actually, looking at baby clothes is an awesome idea. I've been dying to do some shopping (or at least some window shopping!). I would have been at the stores yesterday if they were closer to where I live (the nearest stores are 30 minutes from my house...one of the downsides of living in Vermont!). But I am planning a shopping trip SOON because I now have officially outgrown all my regular pants! Luckily my mom talked me into buying a pair of maternity pants the last time we went shopping.