NO Word Yet from CPS
Since the report was made last Thursday, we haven't heard a word from CPS. DH called the worker-twice-and there has been no call back. I'm guessing they're not taking things too seriously. I mean, now that SS15 is out of our house and "no longer in danger" I guess it's not a priority. Either that or when they interviewed SS at school, they realized he was full of crap.
Of course DH hasn't heard a work from him. SS15 gave BM his sob story about how he "can't handle our expectations" for him and it's "causing him anxiety" (trademark BM phrases). Our only expectations of him were to do his best in school, help out around the house, and treat others respectfully. If those expectations are too high for him, he can stay at BM's and rot. He's a train wreck waiting to happen. It's sad, but I've washed my hands of it. There is literally nothing either DH or I can do for this kid. He's made his choices. He can live with them.
DH, BS18 and I went to our previously scheduled family photo session on Sunday. Those photos will go to family members this Christmas. When DH's parents think we're just hooooorrible for not including pooooooor widdle SS15, that's tough. SS chose to remove himself from the family. When DH's family members give us gifts to pass on to SS15, we're going to tell them they'll have to mail them themselves. We will probably never see SS15 again, therefore we won't be passing along shit. We're so done with the nonsense.
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Comments
CPS, like most government
CPS, like most government agencies, work at a snail's pace. DH got a letter about BM being investigated and it said it takes up to 60 days for them to issue a decision. No reason to move fast in your case anyway since it's all made up crap. The officer probably realizes that so no need to hurry the report.
I'm picturing SS being
I'm picturing SS being interviewed by the worker. Without any warning so he could prepare a load of bullshit, he just sat there with the deer-in-the-headlights look and his mouth hanging open. Mute. It's classic SS15. I'm all too familiar with it. He figures if he acts clueless and says nothing, the authority figure will go away.
Yup. We're done being put in
Yup. We're done being put in the middle. If they want to keep some sort of (non-reciprocated) relationship with BM's kids, they can. But we're not going to be dragged into it. It's been made clear that the kids don't accept us. Their loss.
Our only expectations of him
Our only expectations of him were to do his best in school, help out around the house, and treat others respectfully.
Damn Ghost, that is an awful lot to ask of a 15 year old!!! He probably has post traumatic stress syndrome or something thanks to you guys and your unrealistic expectations..... {gag}
IKR? I mean, it's so basic.
IKR? I mean, it's so basic. My expectations for BS18 have always been WAY, WAY higher! And guess what? He had no problem living up to them.
Of course we're the evil, strict ones with all the restrictive rules...because at BM's house there are NONE.
Yup. We've had the exact same
Yup. We've had the exact same scenario with SS15.
BM: "SS said he doesn't like XYZ and it makes him feel uncomfortable.
COnfront SS. Huuuuuuuh??
Ghost, from someone who went
Ghost, from someone who went through it I'll tell you how ours went down. After the initial report was made and the CPS officer and police came to our home to interview DH and I the same day as the allegation, they then proceeded to interview each of the five children at school (completely unbeknownst to DH and I, we thought okay??? what's going on? We haven't heard anything). After two weeks I called CPS and asked the status of the claims and that we had not had any contact other than the initial one (still didn't know the kids had been talked to at school), Case worker calls me back and says they have 30 days to close the case or report any findings. We would be notified in writing via letter after the 30 day mark. So I waited some more. 42 days went by...NO LETTER...so I call CPS AGAIN, I'm told oh I haven't gotten the letter out but the case was completely dismissed and expunged there was no findings of any type of abuse or neglect, I'll get that letter out today (because I said, Oh I want a copy!) and I then asked about getting a copy of the entire report for my own personal files (just in case I ever needed it you know if BM or exH tried to pull something shitty) and he said I had to request that IN WRITING...and they have 30 days from the date they receive it to get it to me. On day 33 I called and asked if it was ready, I would pick it up rather than have it mailed...nope needed to give them another week, as they had some change ups in positions within their office.
So I guess my point is, it's not uncommon to not hear anything and for it to drag on forever. However, if CPS felt the child was in imminent danger and still having contact with you they would make some sort of action to stop it.
Yuck. Sorry you had to deal
Yuck. Sorry you had to deal with all that. Yeah, I went around and around with CPS for years when my BS was still having visitation with his father. I have no faith in CPS at all. So much time seems to be spent on bullcrap while the families who actually need help slip through the cracks. I'm a social worker, and I will never ever ever work for CPS.